Serious When people don't give you constructive criticism

[Rydia]

I just have to get this off my chest.

So, I have recently had a very frusterating experience.

I was doing my clinicals so I can graduate in December. Clinicals are 12 weeks long. For the first 8-9 weeks, my CI (Clinical instructor) would always give me positive feedback. (like, "you're doing great!" "you did so good today!") Almost nothing negative.

Well a week ago, I started following another CI around while my first one was preparing for a wedding. This other CI said that she had some concerns for me. I was a little worried because I had not heard this before. I was using some of the equipment wrong and positioning myself in relationship to a patient wrong.

I thought that maybe it was from with working with the new CI. So I suggested that I go back and work with my first CI. But then I found out that the first CI had the same issue.

Ok, so why wouldn't the person that I had been working with for 8 weeks not tell me this sooner? Why would she not correct me when I first did it wrong? And why would she make me think that I was doing everything right for the first 8 weeks? I could have corrected what I was doing wrong weeks ago if she had told me. Espeically since it is something I would need to know for a full time job.

I withdrew from that place yesterday and I play to retake the clinical in January somewhere else. I thought about sticking it out for two more weeks, but there is so much that I would have to change that I wasn't sure if I could do it in the two weeks given. Also withdrawing refunds your money and does not give you a failing grade. I really would have liked to have finished it though :/

I am at least glad that the new person I worked with told me everything I was doing wrong and there were concerns. Imagine how it would have been if I got to the final week and suddenly found out I failed with no warning? D:

 

[Espurr]

I agree. I would prefer to have some constructive criticism every once and a while. Don't get me wrong compliments are nice and all but if I don't get criticism, how will I know what areas to improve in? If you keep telling me stuff you think I want to hear yet you know I am doing something wrong how am I supposed to correct the said mistakes and make everyone else happier?

 

[Dee]

Have you straight up asked them to explain to you the issues they had? I'm not familiar with any of the terms or whatever, but you should ask your CI's, if you already haven't, to give you the criticism you're searching for. If they're truly an instructor, they should give you the feedback you seek. That's what they're there for; to guide you through the process and tell you how you're doing along the way. Perhaps it was confusing when the first CI praised you and then the second one said otherwise, but now it's your turn to step up and seek out those answers, whether it be from them or from someone who can provide you with the right instruction.

It may've been their fault for not saying anything, but now it's your turn, now that you've discovered you actually weren't doing so well, to get the clarification you seek.

 

[Gaige]

It's great that you were told so you could retake the course. It might be difficult now but I'm sure you'll appreciate it in the long run.

But really, the fact this guy didn't tell you this can be taken as incompetent. God knows how many students failed because of her, and how many could fail in the future because of her. I'd definitely confront her and tell her where he needs to change. If she doesn't, then I'd really take it further. It might sound a bit drastic but it could help students in the long run.

 

[Rydia]

Have you straight up asked them to explain to you the issues they had? I'm not familiar with any of the terms or whatever, but you should ask your CI's, if you already haven't, to give you the criticism you're searching for. If they're truly an instructor, they should give you the feedback you seek. That's what they're there for; to guide you through the process and tell you how you're doing along the way. Perhaps it was confusing when the first CI praised you and then the second one said otherwise, but now it's your turn to step up and seek out those answers, whether it be from them or from someone who can provide you with the right instruction.

It may've been their fault for not saying anything, but now it's your turn, now that you've discovered you actually weren't doing so well, to get the clarification you seek.

Well we had a meeting about all of it. My first CI started telling me all her concerns and said that she wasn't sure if she could pass me. I asked why she didn't tell me this at midterm and instead, that I was doing good. She didn't really have an answer. She basically said in a very vague way, I thought you would have figured it out. How could I have figured it out if she told me that I did good with each patient? I also told her that I would have appreciated it if she had corrected me when she first saw that I was doing something wrong or unsafe. The few times she did give any criticism, she did not make it sound like a huge deal or serious. It was like "oh that is something that just needs to become automatic." Her tone wasn't serious more flighty. It would have been better if she had said, "you really need to get better at this or it could have detrimental effects on your final grade!" or "you need to make sure that you position your body correctly or the patient could fall."

The second one did all the talking during the meeting and told me everything I had to improve upon and used specific examples. I thanked the second one for being honest and that I would take her criticism and improve upon those areas at another facility. I also talked to my advisor at school and she said that it was fine for me to take the clinical somewhere else in January. The meeting was very stressful and I think the last two weeks at that facility would have been overly stressful.

But damn, talk about being knocked down and a blow to your confidence!

 

[L]

id call your other CI a complete bitch and tell them to go hang herself for acting like such a stupid fuck.

This is what the fuck I don't get about people in the job field. You are not there to be someone's friend, you are not there to make them feel good about themselves, you are there to do your job and do it well.

There is no good reason to hide constructive criticism.

For example, during my job training program... People were always complaining that this chick would never SHUT UP. They said it's not like she wasn't working, but she'd probably get a whole hell of a lot more done if she didn't talk so much.

But did they ever want to make the guy who was training us for jobs aware of this fact? Nope.

These are the people who go out there with their balls flying in the wind and get hired just because they have a decent pair of tits. It's really retarded, because I'm the one who made the guy aware and I have to take the class/course whatever the hell you want to call it again

 

[Rydia]

lol yeah I wanted to. But I was professional about this as I could possibly be.

The worst part about it all, was that everyone knew EXCEPT for me! Would have been nice to talk to me first instead of every other collegue. For the past few weeks, everytime I'd go in, I'd get this very strange vibe, like people were uncomfortable around me. Why the hell would she be afraid to tell me anything?

Ah well, nothing I can do about it now except take these experiences to the next place.

But people seriously need to speak up if they see someone doing something wrong and let them know.

 

[GalaxyFlare]

This is your Chance to familiarise your self with the parts you had trouble with, work on them, you may not have the technical aspects available having withdrawn but theory and repeating mental imagery can help you to establish the "correct" way.

Did the CI say anything about your interpretive skills?
how you perceive set practices, follow instruction, maybe your truthful CI could give you some tutelage and help outside of the professional arena?

At least your not sulking about and were smart enough to withdraw,hopefully you have a better CI next time round,also set out your preferred style of teaching tell him/her you would like the deepest level of criticism for your own edification.......its your career after all!

id call your other CI a complete bitch and tell them to go hang herself for acting like such a stupid fuck.

Yes..........because that would have been very constructive lol

 

[Dee]

Well we had a meeting about all of it. My first CI started telling me all her concerns and said that she wasn't sure if she could pass me. I asked why she didn't tell me this at midterm and instead, that I was doing good. She didn't really have an answer. She basically said in a very vague way, I thought you would have figured it out. How could I have figured it out if she told me that I did good with each patient? I also told her that I would have appreciated it if she had corrected me when she first saw that I was doing something wrong or unsafe. The few times she did give any criticism, she did not make it sound like a huge deal or serious. It was like "oh that is something that just needs to become automatic." Her tone wasn't serious more flighty. It would have been better if she had said, "you really need to get better at this or it could have detrimental effects on your final grade!" or "you need to make sure that you position your body correctly or the patient could fall."

Sounds like it would be very stressful. The second one did her job, but the first one seems to have kind of screwed you over in that she was not being straight forward with you. For whatever reason, it seems like it was both your fault. If there was any concern in your mind that she was hinting towards something being wrong, you should have jumped on it immediately. But how were you supposed to know when she wasn't being all that serious? In any case, I do hope things are worked out. It's not cool when you work that hard and you're there to learn and your instructors aren't on the same page and end up telling you different stories when it's too late.

 

[strifehart]

Well, to be fair, sometimes it can be really tough to give constructive criticism...or any type of criticism at all. I have this friend who likes to write. He's obsessed with writing a short story and getting it published. (he's not an english major or anything, he's actually an engineer). Anyways, he wouldn't let me or any of our friends read his story because he thought we would be assholes (which we kind of are to each other for fun). So he finally let me read it a few weeks ago. It sucked dick. It was absolutely horrible. His vocabulary was sub-par and the whole damn thing was repetitive as hell. Anyways, I couldn't tell him how awful it was because I knew he would get pissed. So I told him it was great. I mean it's stuff like this that lets awful singers get into american idol. If stuff sucks, you gotta call people out on it.

 

[Rydia]

Sounds like it would be very stressful. The second one did her job, but the first one seems to have kind of screwed you over in that she was not being straight forward with you. For whatever reason, it seems like it was both your fault. If there was any concern in your mind that she was hinting towards something being wrong, you should have jumped on it immediately. But how were you supposed to know when she wasn't being all that serious? In any case, I do hope things are worked out. It's not cool when you work that hard and you're there to learn and your instructors aren't on the same page and end up telling you different stories when it's too late.

At the end of every week, I would ask the first CI what I needed to work on for the next and upcoming weeks. She would ask, "well what do you think you need to work on?" I'd kind of get confused and name the areas that I thought I needed to improve upon. So that is exactly what I worked on the next week.

In the meeting it was frusterating to hear all the things my first CI was concerned about. She waited till then to tell me and for the second CI to be the one to tell me everything.

It was awful because with the second CI, she would correct me on everything and tell me to do something a completely different way. And I thought she was being very nitpicky and I would get very annoyed with her. But it turns out, she was teaching me to do things the RIGHT way. I feel bad for feeling that way now and I wish that I had started with her!

My advisor is going to be cool and let me observe at places, and then I can choose the place where I want to make up this clinical. The second CI also gave me a list of things that she was concerned about, so I could look over the list and be aware of it for the next place I go to.

And Strifehart, I agree that it is hard to give criticism. But for a job, especially in the medical field, criticism is very important. You don't want a doctor or a nurse to do someting detrimentally wrong to you because no one told them that they were doing it wrong during their training. Also, if you can't give criticism, then you shouldn't take the responsibility of training someone else for a job.

I get the feeling that there was talking behind my back too from the first CI too. Seriously, why tell everone else and Not me! I'm the one that needs to know that I am doing it wrong. Not the rest of the staff!

Oh well, time to breath and calm down and move on. My next rotation starts in three weeks. Lol I have two extra weeks to prepare for it and build myself back up.

And sorry for ranting. I'm so frusterated over this and still recovering from the shock of it all.

 

[Tmoo]

it could be that your first CI didn't like you for whatever reason and was withholding advice with the intention that you would screw up. that's how i read that kind of behavior - if not that, then utter stupidity and lack of responsibility. she deserves to be fired, or at least have a paycut.

 

[Kandy-Sugar]

I can imagine how frustrating this would have been for you.

I had the same sort of problem in my job, but nothing as major as what you've just talked about.

Just different managers who will tell you to do something in a certain way and you practice this for a while and then another manager then comes along and says, 'Oh wait, you're doing that all wrong'.

Then the original manager agrees with the second manager and then you have to start from scratch and relearn the process all over again.

It would help if they knew what they were doing in the first place.

However, you said that your first instructor said that she had concerns from the start and yet never expressed them?

I don't understand this. Some people are too scared to say you're doing something wrong I think. They want to make you feel good and not upset you and this only ends up hurting you in the end unfortunately. =/

Good luck next time around. Maybe let someone know what happened with your last instructor and ask your new instructor to please be upfront with everything. >.<

Hate to see you have to go through that all again.

 

[Valvalis]

Wow, sorry this happened to you Rydia I hope the next time around it works out better.

At the end of every week, I would ask the first CI what I needed to work on for the next and upcoming weeks. She would ask, "well what do you think you need to work on?" I'd kind of get confused and name the areas that I thought I needed to improve upon. So that is exactly what I worked on the next week.

That's really an awful way for her to do things. I can understand trying to keep a trainee aware of what they're doing, and making sure they're not just waiting for someone to tell them they're good without paying attention to what they're excelling at or not, but you also need to know what SHE thinks you need to work on. It sounds like maybe she just wasn't paying attention or something, which she should definitely get in trouble for, even minor details in this field are critically important.

And Strifehart, I agree that it is hard to give criticism. But for a job, especially in the medical field, criticism is very important. You don't want a doctor or a nurse to do someting detrimentally wrong to you because no one told them that they were doing it wrong during their training. Also, if you can't give criticism, then you shouldn't take the responsibility of training someone else for a job.

I agree here too, it is very difficult to give constructive criticism to people sometimes if you don't want to hurt someone's feelings. But in a serious job situation, much more damage can be done by letting the mistakes slide. In this case though I think the trainer must have just been an idiot, she knows you have to take a test and it was irresponsible for her to "assume" you would "figure out" what you were doing wrong >_>