Pedophilia - Is it wrong?

[The Witch]

To me, and this is a rough, honest truth, I think people are just in it for the submissiveness, innocence and the shape. By shape I mean that some folks, which this is where we call it a mental disorder, prefer really petite folks in general. It is almost child like though.. to be to petite. Think about it.... what differentiates a 20 year old from a 12 year old (physically)? Their bone structure, so no offense to you really petite women (small size, small shape) it would be like dating a minor. That's the hard honest truth for me, and call me a sexist pig or whatever you can throw at me, but that's just my preference to have someone who is the right size both in size and figure.

The submissiveness is really effed up in my honest opinion. Now among men, we have prejudices about you women, that should probably remain in the man hand manual but, we are brain washed to believe that Asian women are submissive. Could be movies, now don't get me wrong I do not believe this, but some times I'm skeptical when I hear a dude brag about how he has a woman that does what he wants, and keeps her in line.

So I believe this is what it falls back to among girls who are not of the age of consent or lower. The physique and the ability to be in control .. etc.. and to be with someone who is a little more naive than the average bear.

Although what differentiates a pedophile and a sexual predator? In my opinion not much.

I see. Well, that's a few reasons why a pedophile would be attracted to them... That's kinda what I always thought they liked kids for, too. I just wasn't sure how to say it.

Although what differentiates a pedophile and a sexual predator? In my opinion not much.

It's actually very interesting that you brought that up. Because a sexual predator rapes women because of the mere fact that they're the one in control of the situation. Much like how you pointed out that pedophiles are attracted to young children because of "the ability to be in control."

So, in a way, the attraction of being in control, for sexual predators and pedophiles, is one of the things that sort of links the two together.

 

[Harlequin]

To me, and this is a rough, honest truth, I think people are just in it for the submissiveness, innocence and the shape.

Many paedophiles are also turned on by the dominion they have over the subject and how they can engineer social situations in which the victim is trapped, such as family members commiting the act and suppressing the victim socially within their own comfort zone.

By shape I mean that some folks, which this is where we call it a mental disorder, prefer really petite folks in general. It is almost child like though.. to be to petite.

Wait a second. To prefer the smaller 'petite' frame is not a 'mental disorder'. I prefer the fuller woman but I would never call someone who prefered smaller women mentally defunct.

There are males who are smaller and prefer a woman who is, in kind, smaller as well (or petite) so they would appear, at least aesthetically speaking, to suit one another and the woman wouldn't appear larger than the male.

Think about it.... what differentiates a 20 year old from a 12 year old (physically)? Their bone structure, so no offense to you really petite women (small size, small shape) it would be like dating a minor.

Although the difference you've stated is more or less the biggest one, there are other physical differences such as pubic hair, the menstruation and sexual organ development.

so no offense to you really petite women (small size, small shape) it would be like dating a minor...

...but that's just my preference to have someone who is the right size both in size and figure.

You've worded it wrong. It wouldn't be like dating a minor, it would be like dating a fully grown woman with a smaller physical genetic makeup. You're giving the impression that a 'petite' woman would have to date a man with a 'mental disorder' or be single for the rest of her life... or become a lesbian :dave:

Also, many would argue that there is no 'right size'.

Although what differentiates a pedophile and a sexual predator? In my opinion not much.

A sexual predator is an individual who harasses someone into sexual relations with them, be it constantly sending explicit pictures to an individual and constantly haranging them to have sexual relations all the way to physically forced relations, crucially, without the consent of the victim.

A paedophile (often mistaken by default to the predator) is someone who has a mental attraction to someone who cannot legally give sexual consent to the paedophile within the laws of the land they're frequenting at the given time.

I realise this crawl of text could be interpreted as a targeted attack and that's not what I meant to do Shu I just don't want people getting the wrong idea.

 

[SaShman]

What exactly is so attractive about a little girl or boy under the age of 13?

To be honest I think you'd only be able to get an answer from a pedophile. Also I think it would be naive to assume that all pedophiles are attracted to children for the same reason.

As for the moral questions about pedophilia it seems that some people hold the view that pedophilia can be tolerated providing someone does not act on it. However, where is the line drawn upon actions? For example if a pedophile masturbates to child pornography he/she is essentially supporting an industry built on child exploitation. Is that right?

If an adult doesn't rape or have sex with children but still interacts with children whom he/she finds attractive, would there still be sexual undertones involved in the interaction? Could such undertones still affect a child psychologically? I would argue yes.

Personally I don't think pedophiles are inherently evil. But I don't think pedophilia should be considered as acceptable (even if a pedophile doesn't actually have sex with children). I think pedophilia should be more of an open subject so those who do experience attractions to children can talk to people/psychologists about it before they act on it.

 

[Saints&Storms]

Yeah I'd say its very wrong, whether being acted on or kept to yourself, its something I think and believe is a mental problem and needs to be fixed. I'm not trying to be sexist here but: when don't men act on sexual feelings? Whether with other people or themselves they will act on them.

And if we say peadophilia is 'Okay', then sooner or later they are going to think marrying a child is okay, and the road won't stop their, when that ends they'll probably move on to babies.

 

[Shu]

you're giving the impression that a 'petite' woman would have to date a man with a 'mental disorder' or be single for the rest of her life... or become a lesbian :dave:

Well, it was still a good response, though I didn't mean to come off like that. What I meant was, some folks look REALLY young, and even prior to chatting someone up, the person is actively pursuing them all because of their looks. Now it would be different if they had been talking first or whatever.. but a lot of times this isn't the case.

I think out of context, how I worded it sounded bad, but what I was aiming at is some ladies, some fellas, look literally like they are 12. If someone is auto-attracted to that, I have a bit of concern..

There are petite girls, who are extremely attractive to me, but this not what I meant. I mean the ones who are young in the face as well, I know I know, some folks on the forum might say.. "ugh.. he's talking about me", but all I'm saying is some guys are predators (as well as women are too), and they are attracted to a certain makeup (not cosmetic, I meant profiling) of a woman/man.

The guy could be okay, who knows - but this is what I'm getting at with this. For instance I think a person.. who I once knew is actually a pedderass, because at first he was into really really petite ladies, in which afterwards he would always make inappropriate comments how if the age of consent was lowered, he would be greatful. Safe to say, my stomach curdled a bit.

The sad part is these days 14 year olds can pull off a 22 year olds look in a heart beat. So some folks see it as hard to determine.. But personally, if one knows the person age, and still actively pursues her/him.. that's when it comes down to pedophilia.

 

[The Witch]

Okay, now what stops a pedophile from fulfilling their sexual fantasies with a child?

Especially if they work at a school or live near one, or have young family members(pedophilia rape happens most in families), what exactly is stopping them from fulfilling their fantasies with a 13 year-old or younger?

 

[Ewan]

The same thing that stops me trying to fulfill my fantasies with the girl that lives below me? I'm sure they are capable of doing that. Why not?

 

[Harlequin]

Get ready for this

For example if a pedophile masturbates to child pornography he/she is essentially supporting an industry built on child exploitation. Is that right?

That's a very good point. The idea behind it is if the material in question involves lude acts on a minor then not only are the creators of the video charged with paedophilia but also the distributors and indeed the consumers by direct extention for allowing an criminal industry to thrive.

However, there is the rather solid argument that if an individual wants to watch that kind of material but the material is GFX or manga then that's at their own discretion, as long as they keep the material to themselves.

Personally I don't think pedophiles are inherently evil. But I don't think pedophilia should be considered as acceptable (even if a pedophile doesn't actually have sex with children).

If a paedophile doesn't engage in any sexual contact or harassment of a minor then that man/woman is the same as any heterosexual or homosexual.

We all have our sexual preferences and unfortunately paedophiles have a hard time seeking help because of the immense scorn and relentless threats they'd receive were they to come out about it.

I think pedophilia should be more of an open subject so those who do experience attractions to children can talk to people/psychologists about it before they act on it.

Perhaps in an ideal world, but sadly not this one. It'll continue to be an underground problem.

Paedophiles are like any other person. They feel shut out because of what they are and a deep and intense resentment builds and they may act upon it out of jealousy for those that aren't.

Even on minors.

These people don't need to be judged, nor punished, they need help.

when don't men act on sexual feelings? Whether with other people or themselves they will act on them.

In fairness males are constantly building testosterone which needs releasing. It's unfair to cast a disdainful attitude (sorry if I've misinterpreted that) over an entire gender when, given that you're a female, you couldn't possibly fully understand the issue in question.

It boils down to how centered a male (or female for that matter) is psychologically and indeed morally. I myself have had various propositions (from males too :ugh: ) and have turned them down because of what I believe.

I realise you're angle is statistical and not meant to be sexist. It's based on the fact that males are the vast majority to act upon it whereas what your words actually implied is that males are more likely to do it, which is sexist.

And if we say peadophilia is 'Okay', then sooner or later they are going to think marrying a child is okay, and the road won't stop their, when that ends they'll probably move on to babies.

That's a giant 'if'. The 'act' of paedophilia will never be allowed under western governments, but the condition is something that a person develops. The two are worlds apart.

Racism for example is permitted, but only in the mind. When it is exercised (be it with insults to an individual or throwing away someone's CV based on race) that is when racism becomes a crime and isn't tolerated.

But personally, if one knows the person age, and still actively pursues her/him.. that's when it comes down to pedophilia.

Wholeheartedly agree.

I know I know, some folks on the forum might say.. "ugh.. he's talking about me"

ugh... he's talking about me

 

[Linnaete]

There's not much I can add here as many people have covered the points.

Paedophilia is one of those controversial issues that are divisive with a definite answer that is blurred and unclear. The original article just shows a straight example of a sexual assault on a minor. That of course, is wrong. Under no circumstance is it acceptable for a young child to be victimised like that and be mentally stricken by shock and helplessness.

I certainly don't think that it is entirely fair that we can just make the sweeping generalisation that all individuals with paedophiliac tendencies are evil and should be hanged etc. As people have said, it's a sexual preference they have that is unfortunately for them, heavily despised upon by society. If they keep these feelings to themselves and do not act upon them, then that would be fine to an extent. There are people who are able to suppress their sexual fantasies to themselves.

However, I find it unacceptable if they enjoy watching actual child porn (and not just cartoon depictions of them). As someone has said, that only encourages the unsavoury industry to continue having minors sexually abused. That isn't right. At least with cartoon depictions, no one is really being harmed - not that I condone them either.

Okay, now what stops a pedophile from fulfilling their sexual fantasies with a child?

Like I said in two paragraphs above, I'm sure many people are capable of suppressing their desires. I know there are plenty of people who can't, but the rest of us can at least think about where our actions may land us into and weigh out the consequences.

 

[Harlequin]

The original article just shows a straight example of a sexual assault on a minor. That of course, is wrong. Under no circumstance is it acceptable for a young child to be victimised like that and be mentally stricken by shock and helplessness.

I agree with you, but you haven't explained why you believe it's wrong to be a paedophile or dare I say sexually assault a minor.

Having said that I'm obviously now going to have to explain myself. I believe in Christian ideology which prohibits such behaviour, but in Islamic ideology for example, many followers believe that having an 'underage', as it were, wife is fully sanction by Allah.

Then there's societies such as the Spartans' who believe that creating that bond with their mentor and overcoming the trauma makes them stronger for it.

Darwin, arguably the father of Athiesm, stated 'survival of the fittest' and that in the end, we may have huge mental capacity but are all animals and end up dead like all animals.

So if life is indeed 'survival of the fittest' surely anyone could do what they wanted without fear of moral reprisal? Isn't that what the athiest has subscribed to?

I don't believe in that. Which is why I believe those acts to be morally wrong. But I have to explain every why I can possibly think of when regarding morality.

It's doubtless going to look as if I'm bashing all ideologies other than my own, but the question was asking is: Is Paedophilia wrong? - To which my reply is yes, in my ideology. But the majority of posts in the thread are stating that it's wrong because it's damaging to another person, which doesn't answer the question. We have to think about why harming someone else is wrong as well.

The issue is far from resolved... and I'm going to be looked at as a raving lunatic now

 

[Ewan]

Darwin, arguably the father of Athiesm, stated 'survival of the fittest' and that in the end, we may have huge mental capacity but are all animals and end up dead like all animals.

So if life is indeed 'survival of the fittest' surely anyone could do what they wanted without fear of moral reprisal? Isn't that what the athiest has subscribed to?

First of all, Darwin is not the father of atheism. He developed the theory of evolution which has nothing to do with whether or not you believe in a god.

Also, 'Darwinian morality' is a harsh system given at face value. But you don't have to subscribe to it and to say that an atheist has done so is ridiculous. I am an atheist and I still find pedophilia to be wrong. I still have morals because I can think for myself and society has engineered me to think in a certain way. If they could do what they wanted without fear of moral reprisal then people would steal from each other and kill each other which is obviously a poor way to survive seeing as people are likely to do the same to you. That's why people work together and we see the same in the animal kingdom.

EDIT: Actually, I don't think Darwinian morality is harsh. I take that back, but my point stands. I think.

 

[Rasputin]

If people always acted on attraction, the levels of rape on society would go through the roof. The fact is, most people do NOT act on sexual attraction, especially in cases where it is considered socially unacceptable. None of you have yet to show WHAT is so inherently wrong about finding kids sexually attractive. You are not the thought police, and you don't get to decide what is morally right and wrong simply because one legitimate sexual preference makes you feel uncomfortable. As long as people don't act on those urges, absolutely nothing is wrong with being attracted to whoever or whatever they want.

 

[Harlequin]

First of all, Darwin is not the father of atheism. He developed the theory of evolution which has nothing to do with whether or not you believe in a god.

Admittedly I may have slipped in calling him the 'father of atheism'.

I am an atheist and I still find pedophilia to be wrong.

Do you realise that you've failed to qualify your statement there?

I still have morals because I can think for myself and society has engineered me to think in a certain way.

Do you see where you've contradicted yourself?

If they could do what they wanted without fear of moral reprisal then people would steal from each other and kill each other which is obviously a poor way to survive seeing as people are likely to do the same to you

Which is frequently what happened before Hammurabi founded a code of laws and others followed suit.

Why should I care if I can do it and get away with it? Who's going to punish me if nobody can do anything about it?

"Because it hurts people" isn't a valid argument for the demonisation of the act of paedophilia. You have to ask why hurting people is wrong.

None of you have yet to show WHAT is so inherently wrong about finding kids sexually attractive.

I have shown why I believe the act to be wrong in several of my posts.

Is Paedophilia wrong? --- Yes because I believe one should strive to be as virtuous as one can possibly be to go to Heaven and I believe the act of paedophilia is a backward step to that goal.

Aside from being prohibited it stifles or even warps the mental growth of the victim and can turn that person into a self hating, resentful person and as a direct consequence handicap their chance of reaching Heaven.

I don't believe a paedophile cannot get to Heaven, it's just how his/her brain has formed. Much like a heterosexual or homosexual.

You are not the thought police, and you don't get to decide what is morally right and wrong simply because one legitimate sexual preference makes you feel uncomfortable. As long as people don't act on those urges, absolutely nothing is wrong with being attracted to whoever or whatever they want.

I'll not delivering that as fact. I believe the adjudicator decides, whomever he/she/it may be.

Attempting to prove that it's wrong as a fact would be an exercise in futility.

 

[Rasputin]

Let me rephrase this question then, since you're clearly bent on beating around the bush.

What about anonymous pedophilia, which does nothing to hurt you or anyone else, gives you and all the other moral zealots in this thread the right to harass and stereotype them on a public message board?

 

[Ewan]

It's not contradiction to say that I have a process for thinking and that I can use that process to think for myself.

Also, I don't need to qualify it. I'm simply saying that an atheist has not subscribed to they way of thinking you had stated.

I wasn't really replying to you concerning pedophilia, I was just objecting to what you said about atheists.

 

[SapphireStar]

I dont see how people can argue it to be right!!! Its beyond wrong, the trauma the child suffers from for years to come is upsetting and the individual needs to be punished serverly. Some prisons and courts are shit when it comes to dealing with sick bastards, they get treated better then the victim! No, its wrong, wrong, wrong, fucking wrong. In no way is it bloody right!!

 

[Rasputin]

I dont see how people can argue it to be right!!! Its beyond wrong, the trauma the child suffers from for years to come is upsetting and the individual needs to be punished serverly. Some prisons and courts are shit when it comes to dealing with sick bastards, they get treated better then the victim! No, its wrong, wrong, wrong, fucking wrong. In no way is it bloody right!!

BECAUSE YOU KNOW WE'RE ALL CAVEMEN WHO ARE INCAPABLE OF CONTROLLING OUR THOUGHTS AND ACTIONS, AND obviously if we have ONE fetish, we're completely incapable of going out in public without acting on it, right?

 

[SapphireStar]

BECAUSE YOU KNOW WE'RE ALL CAVEMEN WHO ARE INCAPABLE OF CONTROLLING OUR THOUGHTS AND ACTIONS, AND obviously if we have ONE fetish, we're completely incapable of going out in public without acting on it, right?

Oh my God, let people have their damn opinions. We are answering the thread question and dont have to prove oursleves to you for God sake!

And what has that got to do with what Ive said? Where did I say that everytime one steps out of the house they attack a child? I never said no such thing.

 

[Harlequin]

What about anonymous pedophilia, which does nothing to hurt you or anyone else, gives you and all the other moral zealots in this thread the right to harass and stereotype them on a public message board?

First off, clearly I've offended you and I apologise, it was never my intention.

This was my definition of a stereotypical paedophile:

A paedophile (often mistaken by default to the sexual*** predator) is someone who has a mental attraction to someone who cannot legally give sexual consent to the paedophile within the laws of the land they're frequenting at the given time.

***Edit

Perhaps in an ideal world, but sadly not this one. It'll continue to be an underground problem.

Paedophiles are like any other person. They feel shut out because of what they are and a deep and intense resentment builds and they may act upon it out of jealousy for those that aren't.

Even on minors.

These people don't need to be judged, nor punished, they need help.

If a paedophile doesn't engage in any sexual contact or harassment of a minor then that man/woman is the same as any heterosexual or homosexual.

We all have our sexual preferences and unfortunately paedophiles have a hard time seeking help because of the immense scorn and relentless threats they'd receive were they to come out about it.

I've only said that I believe that the act is wrong and not the thought.

If I've offended you or anyone else there's no need to bite my head off, just quote me and I'll happily address the issue.

 

[Shu]

If people always acted on attraction, the levels of rape on society would go through the roof. The fact is, most people do NOT act on sexual attraction, especially in cases where it is considered socially unacceptable. None of you have yet to show WHAT is so inherently wrong about finding kids sexually attractive. You are not the thought police, and you don't get to decide what is morally right and wrong simply because one legitimate sexual preference makes you feel uncomfortable. As long as people don't act on those urges, absolutely nothing is wrong with being attracted to whoever or whatever they want.

Finding kids attractive on a sexual level is only wrong to the person who is doing it. Meaning.. they go by their own code, now my state of mind will not allow me to think like that. It's like finding my dog attractive or something along these lines. It just don't go hand in hand with "what" I'm attracted to. Same thing with fetishes and so on, some people are into some freaky deaky shiznit... but we are talking about children here.

Our future generation is the key here. Zealot or not, I find it disgusting, due to my thought process not yours. Now only if they act on it, is it truly wrong. So that's what people are getting at, I don't think people care if you like to stare holes in my mom, cause you feel her attractive Adamant. As long as you don't act on it, it's fine.

Let me rephrase this question then, since you're clearly bent on beating around the bush.

What about anonymous pedophilia, which does nothing to hurt you or anyone else, gives you and all the other moral zealots in this thread the right to harass and stereotype them on a public message board?

Secondly, this was not needed. People are entitled to their own opinion. If you do not like it, the best thing for you to do is either respond, in a calm manner, or back away. "BIG" text does not get a point across more than a well thought out post.