Can't We All Just Get Along?

[CassinoChips]

I thought it would be fairly obvious by now, but I suppose that's a discussion for another day.

Obviously it's not, otherwise I wouldn't be asking.

They shouldn't be forwarded to staff in the first place unless they are legitimately spam or threatening messages.

Or if a member had a concern that the member who PMd them was breaking a site rule. Which was the case here.

What I dealt with was an emotionally insecure staff member who was looking for reasons to suspend me because of some personal disagreements we had in earlier threads.

You can act like it was that particular staffer going rogue all you want, but that wasn't the case. It was discussed in HQ, and a mutual agreement was reached. As is the case with any non-standard situation.

After being falsely accused of PM advertising, said member decided that instead of talking to me or even giving a warning about the issue, that I should have to sit in the proverbial "time out corner"

Warnings are a courtesy. They are not required. And "falsely" is inaccurate, as you were advertising another site via PM. You even admitted your guilt.

"I understand you are trying to enforce the rules and that by the most literal definition, I was breaking one of them."

while being verbally taunted for trying produce logical evidence in my defense. That wasn't effective enforcement of the rules, it was targeted harassment, and it taught me a good lesson on being very careful where I post and to always assume that the worst will happen in potential conflicts.

You weren't "taunted." The discussion got heated. Was that handled in the best way possible? Maybe not. Would it have changed anything? Probably not.

 

[Donald Trump]

I like a bit of tension, if everyone got along things would be very boring.

And without trying to take too much credit, I am one of the people who is most often blamed for hostility etc. And I haven't seen any particular rise in hostility.

I come on here to have a laugh. If people decide to take me seriously and think I'm targeting them etc, then I couldn't give a fuck. I have never and almost certainly will never apologise for something I've said.

 

[Marquis of Granby]

Regardless of what Shaun decides to post on the forums, it doesn't warrant others to troll him for it. This is the point I'm getting at. Regardless if someone doesn't like Shaun or believes that he posts to much information about his life on a forum, it gives nobody the right to take shots at him. Nobody deserves to be trolled, but such mentality of others believe that it's okay. If you don't like reading what Shaun has to say about his life, then walk away and read something else. I see many threads roll around that I don't like and/or have no interest in, and its as easy as staying away from it. Self-control is something that should really be practiced more.

these two

I haven't noticed anything like this yet really. People have always argued and bickered and there have always been people who cry when everyone doesn't act like they do in kid's TV shows.

I say suck it up and get over it.

I come on here to have a laugh. If people decide to take me seriously and think I'm targeting them etc, then I couldn't give a fuck. I have never and almost certainly will never apologise for something I've said.

plus what lew said.

its a nice ideal but thats all it is. as cliche as it sounds this is only the internet and i think quite a few folk take it all far too seriously.

 

[Gaige]

I have to agree with Hal, Pooley and James here. In a place like this, you're gonna get someone whose sense of humor is taking the piss out of you for all it's worth. And if you can't take that with a pinch of salt, you're only gonna get it worse. It's all about reaction.

 

[Rasputin]

Or if a member had a concern that the member who PMd them was breaking a site rule. Which was the case here.

It was a example of a staff member failing to understand the intent of the rule and twisting it's meaning to punish members they simply didn't like. They could have easily started suspending anyone who posted youtube links in the shoutbox and calling it "advertising". But they didn't do that. How many people have sent Facebook links to friends through PMs and gotten suspended for it? Nobody. But that didn't happen with me. Instead, I got suspended without any warning and without a fair hearing. Why? Because I was an easy target. Don't even try to justify their actions. I should be getting an apology, not a bunch of excuses for how poorly they did their job in my case.

You can act like it was that particular staffer going rogue all you want, but that wasn't the case. It was discussed in HQ, and a mutual agreement was reached.

"Mutual agreement"? Really? Then where were all the other staff accusing me of breaking the rules? It was only ONE person who was biased against me since the day I started posting who conversed with me in that prison thread. Of course there would probably a few other staff who were willing to take the accusation for granted, but that's to be expected. They're supposed to trust another mod's better judgment. The problem was that this particular mod decided not to use any. It's an unfortunate conflict but I have a right to be angry about it.

As is the case with any non-standard situation. Warnings are a courtesy. They are not required. And "falsely" is inaccurate, as you were advertising another site via PM. You even admitted your guilt.

I linked to another webpage, yes. I didn't advertise. All I did was admit that I could see how in this staff member's warped version of reality, how I could have potentially done something that could be considered advertising. That's called being a reasonable debater. However, I never admitted to violating a rule.

You weren't "taunted." The discussion got heated. Was that handled in the best way possible? Maybe not. Would it have changed anything? Probably not.

Anyone with an ounce of common sense, outside the little circle that ganged up on me, would see that the actions taken were not taken in the best interests of the site and were clearly malicious. Obviously I can't copy and paste quotes of what was going on there because the Prisoner's board is hidden. What do you expect?

 

[SapphireStar]

Wow, I can see where youre coming from. I have noticed some people have been crabby. I mean heck I do sometimes get peeved at people for how they act on here. But you need to chill out and just remember its the Internet and not everyones on the same wavelength as you.

I respect other peoples opinions and sometimes can lash out. But I make sure I apologise straight away. You need to just chill and get on with it. Some people dont like the mods, but I actually like them as people and respect them. Im not being an arse licker or anything, its hard being a mod and keeping peace.

 

[CassinoChips]

It was a example of a staff member failing to understand the intent of the rule and twisting it's meaning to punish members they simply didn't like. They could have easily started suspending anyone who posted youtube links in the shoutbox and calling it "advertising". But they didn't do that. How many people have sent Facebook links to friends through PMs and gotten suspended for it? Nobody. But that didn't happen with me. Instead, I got suspended without any warning and without a fair hearing. Why? Because I was an easy target. Don't even try to justify their actions. I should be getting an apology, not a bunch of excuses for how poorly they did their job in my case.

A member forwarding the PM to staff is a staff member failing to understand the rule?

Also, Youtube, Facebook, etc. don't have RPGs. Therefore links to them can't be considered recruiting for another site's RPG.

"Mutual agreement"? Really? Then where were all the other staff accusing me of breaking the rules? It was only ONE person who was biased against me since the day I started posting who conversed with me in that prison thread. Of course there would probably a few other staff who were willing to take the accusation for granted, but that's to be expected. They're supposed to trust another mod's better judgment. The problem was that this particular mod decided not to use any. It's an unfortunate conflict but I have a right to be angry about it.

Again, the staffer didn't just go off half-cocked. It was discussed in HQ. Our policy is not to broadcast everything that takes place in HQ all of over the site. But just because every staffer didn't personally give you the thumbs down doesn't mean it didn't happen.

I linked to another webpage, yes. I didn't advertise. All I did was admit that I could see how in this staff member's warped version of reality, how I could have potentially done something that could be considered advertising. That's called being a reasonable debater. However, I never admitted to violating a rule.

" ... rules ... I was breaking one of them."

outside the little circle that ganged up on me

So was it one staffer who was biased against you? Or several staffers ganging up on you?

 

[M1ghty Mous3]

I haven't a lue as to weather I'm respected or not here on the boards. But i do like to try and keep a peaceful atmosphere when it comes to presenting myself and my views towards others. Yes people have ideas on topic i don't agree with but idon't see tha tasa reason to start taking jabs at them. And unless im ignorant on the subject or if it's something else, ihaven't seen much hostility around here lately. But maybe it's just me.

But like i said previously I don't know weather people like me here or not, but I've tried and hopefully succedded in beng a pleasent member.

 

[blakstang98]

I think my point is being lost here. For one, I'm not talking about one person or a handful of people taking shots, I'm seeing just about everybody at one point or another getting something thrown at them. There are people taking hits that I've never seen take hits before, and I'm also seeing people that don't normally take shots, taking them. My point is, I want EVERYONE to clean up their act. This includes me as well, I know I've been a bit off lately too. And for two, I'm seeing the spiral get created in this thread, which is ironic. So trolling is okay, so long as people can let it go. But we all know that not everyone will just let it slide, yet it continues. Sure, the ones who don't let it slide, can lighten up and let it. Or the trolls who commit such acts can troll less. The latter being the point I'm getting at. It's the more peaceful route to take in my opinion. And yes, I understand that not everyone will get along, and that's all well and good, but keep it out of public domain. I know there are people I don't get along with, but none you know who they are, do you?

I'm a big fan of smooth operation. For a forum, that would mean a small amount of hostility. Naturally you can't stop everything, but keeping it to a minimum is what I like. Whether its in a forum or in real life, you can never solve a problem with another problem. If person A is not liked by person B, and person B decides to torch person A, what did that solve? Now person A feels like shit, friends of person A may take objection to it and higher authority may have to take action. Could this issue between person A and person B have been solved differently? Yes. Was this method used the best possible solution? Maybe in certain situations, yes, but on a forum, no. So what could have been done about it that would have warrented better results? Person B just shuts their mouth and walks away. Why is that better? What person A doesn't know won't hurt them and person B won't have to waste their time doing something that can ultimately get them in trouble.

Hopefully this clears up some of my concerns. I thought I layed it out in black and white before, but that wasn't the case. Now lets gather around the circle, while I sing "Cumbaya".

 

[Rasputin]

A member forwarding the PM to staff is a staff member failing to understand the rule?

Also, Youtube, Facebook, etc. don't have RPGs. Therefore links to them can't be considered recruiting for another site's RPG.

There was no other RPG. There was some experimental software we were going to toy around with for personal amusement and a look at how the coding worked. There never was going to be community competing with this site, and there was never going to be a finished game. The people who got the link knew it was coming, and everyone who received it other than the one particular member who PMed the mod acknowledged that it was NOT advertising. Both of these facts were blatantly ignored in my prison thread. It would be different if I was spamming links to other Final Fantasy themed communities, which was the whole point of the rule in the first place.

I'm still convinced this was a targeted incident. Staff members are hardly suspending anyone posting in the Omegle thread, even though by your logic the people who link to the site are "recruiting" members for a competing site's chat software.

" ... rules ... I was breaking one of them."

Devil's advocate. How many other ways can I repeat this?

So was it one staffer who was biased against you? Or several staffers ganging up on you?

I already said it was one staffer, plus a few others who didn't understand the extent of the situation but, as any reasonable mod would, assumed that this person was correct. I don't blame anyone on the current staff. In fact, most of them seemed quite reasonable about the whole affair. I'm simply using this as an example of certain individuals going out of their way to cause conflict with other members on this site.

I think the lesson that can be learned from the whole mess is that trolls eventually tend to leave this site of their old accord (as this particular staff did) as they realize harassing other members does nothing to improve their personal lives. Our job should be to try to speed up this process by ignoring them when possible, confronting them when necessary, and standing up for a welcoming and productive community.

 

[Kelranox]

No, we can't. Because some people here would go about taking one of two routes (mostly with newcomers): 1. Ignore them and go about conversing with the members that have been here for ages. 2. Insult the newcomer as if his minuscule post count represents the fact that he/she isn't a person.

Very rarely have I been acknowledged in a positive manner, such has been done on behalf of a staff member or two, mostly whenever I've had questions. I'll say 2/5 have been answered just as a round about way of going at it. What's more, if you complain about it then you'll obviously be hecked. To be honest, the main reason I come here is to find out about updates regarding Square Enix. I've found that I can't quite take the shoutbox for too long.

Such behavior really defeats the purpose of a forum, which as I recall is to create a gathering point on the internet in which for people to congregate and discuss matters of the same topic in a positive manner. What's more, I could see myself being hecked for this but as I said, my purpose on this forum is no longer to make friends. I may be defeating my own purpose mentioned above but sometimes the actions of others ruin those of the willing.

 

[Toshiya]

I've noticed a bit of this but its part of life... some people go through rough patches or have their off days, and people who are normally the best of friends can take shots at each other for no real reasons

It's part of life... if, as you say, people are being more 'hostile', then I'm sure it'll sort itself out soon. But some people don't get on, will never get on, aren't meant to get on. There's nobody here I have a problem with and I don't think anyone has a major problem with me. Sometimes I can be a little snappy but that's generally if I'm tired or not in the best mood... everyone does it at times.

 

[CassinoChips]

There was no other RPG. There was some experimental software we were going to toy around with for personal amusement and a look at how the coding worked. There never was going to be community competing with this site, and there was never going to be a finished game. The people who got the link knew it was coming, and everyone who received it other than the one particular member who PMed the mod acknowledged that it was NOT advertising. Both of these facts were blatantly ignored in my prison thread. It would be different if I was spamming links to other Final Fantasy themed communities, which was the whole point of the rule in the first place.

"I don't know how busy you are now, but if you could help me with art and quests and stuff I'd think we could make a really cool version of Inferno."

I'm still convinced this was a targeted incident. Staff members are hardly suspending anyone posting in the Omegle thread, even though by your logic the people who link to the site are "recruiting" members for a competing site's chat software.

It's not the same. Omegle isn't a forum.

Devil's advocate. How many other ways can I repeat this?

Devil's advocate is saying "Let's say for a moment I broke a rule," not "I realize I broke a rule."

I already said it was one staffer, plus a few others who didn't understand the extent of the situation but, as any reasonable mod would, assumed that this person was correct. I don't blame anyone on the current staff. In fact, most of them seemed quite reasonable about the whole affair. I'm simply using this as an example of certain individuals going out of their way to cause conflict with other members on this site.

I think the lesson that can be learned from the whole mess is that trolls eventually tend to leave this site of their old accord (as this particular staff did) as they realize harassing other members does nothing to improve their personal lives. Our job should be to try to speed up this process by ignoring them when possible, confronting them when necessary, and standing up for a welcoming and productive community.

Fair enough.

I am curious, though, as to why you feel you can't be involved in the RP section. That bothers me, as I don't want that to be the case for any member.

 

[Rasputin]

Here's a thought. If there's a conflict between two members, instead of having them duke it out in a thread, why not make an arbitration system of some sort?

 

[Big Casino]

If person A is not liked by person B, and person B decides to torch person A, what did that solve? Now person A feels like shit, friends of person A may take objection to it and higher authority may have to take action. Could this issue between person A and person B have been solved differently? Yes. Was this method used the best possible solution? Maybe in certain situations, yes, but on a forum, no. So what could have been done about it that would have warrented better results? Person B just shuts their mouth and walks away. Why is that better? What person A doesn't know won't hurt them and person B won't have to waste their time doing something that can ultimately get them in trouble.

It sounds like your really the only once thats really bothered by this majorly. I dont know how to put it without sounding rude but just loosen up and get real a little. From what everyones posted saying here. It doesnt sound like either person a or b really give a toss.
Avoiding conflict isnt alwyas possible. And i know id rather get something out if it bothers me. And at the end of the day like EVERYONE agrees. Its the internet, not something worth losing sleep over.

 

[Shu]

No, we can't. Because some people here would go about taking one of two routes (mostly with newcomers): 1. Ignore them and go about conversing with the members that have been here for ages. 2. Insult the newcomer as if his minuscule post count represents the fact that he/she isn't a person.

I don't think I've ever seen anyone obviously get ignored on this forum unless they stand out to either have terrible grammar (no offense it's just hard to read for me) or outright doesn't want to become active. I.E. Just come here to ask questions about FF and then leave when they get the answer. (I did it at first in 2006 as well).

I've never seen anyone insulted for post count, ever. Unless of course they didn't give the forum a chance because they were making up lies about themselves and when found out they went silent over long periods of time, and then finally said "I'm leaving."

I'm responded to about everyone's leaving thread, and no offense to those who say they are leaving, but no you are not, unless you don't write anything. Jane/bei bei/Casanova.. a few other folks.. I never really saw leaving threads.. they just stopped coming around. It's like a suicide post.. I don't believe it, because I've been on the affected side of 2 real suicides. I'm just saying..

I'm one of the nicest dudes you'll meet, unless you lie to me. That's the only thing I do not handle very well. Otherwise, you can call me a Homosexual Redneck Inbred who gets it up the butt by his father, and I'll be like... , a bit much? Well I'm serious. I just don't take too many folks seriously unless they come to me in a serious light. I know when to knock the shit off, and I know when to joke around. It's humanity at it's best in my opinion.

I've found that I can't quite take the shoutbox for too long.

Such behavior really defeats the purpose of a forum, which as I recall is to create a gathering point on the internet in which for people to congregate and discuss matters of the same topic in a positive manner. What's more, I could see myself being hecked for this but as I said, my purpose on this forum is no longer to make friends. I may be defeating my own purpose mentioned above but sometimes the actions of others ruin those of the willing.

Not everyone is going to agree that Final Fantasy VII is the greatest Final Fantasy and most revolutionary Final Fantasy like myself, I came to grips without even before entering this forum, thanks to my buds back at home. Everyone has a different taste, but most came here to banter on at first about Final Fantasy and then moved on to other genres and then to their own life since we found many similarities among another.

You won't catch me in the FF side of the forums, unless I'm playing it.. don't get me wrong, I just think Square Enix has been really disappointing as of late with the franchise, and done better in other new franchises. Final Fantasy will always be "close" to heart as far as games, but I refuse to retain hours and hours of knowledge that I've played. To be honest I am sickened at myself for playing 120 hours+ on both FFVII and FFX. 80 or so on VIII, IX, XII and 50 or so on XI, I and II. I also played probably around 300 + hours on XI the online game. All of it is great and stuff, but it sucked the living life out of me thanks to the unhealthy addiction =P.

--

For Adri and Immenseman - Busta went out of his kind way to allow Immenseman back after doing the whole Mr. Stone thing, and we aren't going to cover that up forever. Sexual harassment and racism are both reallry big deals on this forum, so that's why when you are let back most folks were really taken back. So be nice to folks, will ya? Don't call folks nerds, for playing Halo3 and being MLG. They found what they are good at and they make money from it, there will always be people like that. I.E. War and soldiers. If you want to flirt with girls on the site, that's none of my business, all the more power to you, I'm married, I can't.

If you want to keep creating these little spam threads and/or get offended every time someone posts something, you are enabling them. Grow some skin, and move it along, or join in the fun. They are only picking at you because they see how easily angered you get.

---
That's all I got.

 

[Gingerbread Lesbian]

Here's a thought. If there's a conflict between two members, instead of having them duke it out in a thread, why not make an arbitration system of some sort?

This isn't going to be a long post but that's actually quite a good idea, I think something was once brought up like this about members having problems with mods and vice versa. I'll bring it up in HQ and see what is said.

 

[blakstang98]

It sounds like your really the only once thats really bothered by this majorly. I dont know how to put it without sounding rude but just loosen up and get real a little. From what everyones posted saying here. It doesnt sound like either person a or b really give a toss.
Avoiding conflict isnt alwyas possible. And i know id rather get something out if it bothers me. And at the end of the day like EVERYONE agrees. Its the internet, not something worth losing sleep over.

No offense, but that's a very selfish way of looking at it. I had a long hard day, so I'll take it out on you so that I feel better. I understand that at the end of the day, they're just people on the internet, but on the same token, getting a laugh at someone elses expense is wrong in my opinion. They are still people and still have feelings after all.

 

[Jack's Smirking Revenge]

If they're letting something that a randomer on the internet who was probably only being half serious anyway get to them that much, then they deserve it tbh.

 

[Big Casino]

No offense, but that's a very selfish way of looking at it. I had a long hard day, so I'll take it out on you so that I feel better. I understand that at the end of the day, they're just people on the internet, but on the same token, getting a laugh at someone elses expense is wrong in my opinion. They are still people and still have feelings after all.

Where did i bring up about taking things out on other people? Where are you getting that from????
Loads of things are wrong and you cant do a things about them sadly. Its not your forum, you cant make people get along no matter how much youd really like it to be, whether you be admin or member.
Im saying that the general repsonse says that people arent really bothered by having the mick taken out of them. If thats the case then theyre not gunna lose sleep over little things that are said.
Likee shu said. If you cant beat em join em. If you show your annoyed then thats makes ya a target. Although it sounds like the whole thing bothers you alot. Maybe you should take time off.