Serious High School Bitches

Gabe

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What should I do? There's this friggin' hypocrite girl in my class who thinks she's the friggin' queen and goes around talking about people behind their backs, but when someone else makes a comment about her, she freaks out and gets people involved with stupid drama stuff, somehow gains everyone's respect and turns their friends against them. This is totally ridiculous, and I'm involved with this right now. I am EMBARRASSED to be involved with this situation. It's crazy. I told these people I'm done with their bullshit, and will leave them all alone and just move along, BUT THEY KEEP COMING! They're confronting me and saying things like "I heard you said _____ about _____!" and then I'm like "NO! I haven't said that for a week! I take it back now! Screw it!" and stuff. I apologized already, got jack shit from them. I was even nice about it, too. They're going crazy and it's immature. I just want to move on and actually pay attention to school?
 
I know exactly the crowd you're talking about and let me tell you this:

Nothing you say will ever be good enough for them.

These kinds of people have watched way too much of High School Musical and Glee and think life is all about the big HS. They feed off the drama the way a parasite will slowly drain the host before killing it, with the exception being that the parasite is a noble and proud creature in comparison.

And I know exactly what you mean when you say you've gotten tangled up in this shit somehow -- the same has happened to me, for no other reason than the start of a new semester and some bored bitch saw me quietly taking notes day after day and decided to have some fun and spread rumors around that I sleep around the school. Ironic, considering her own street-corner history.

In any case, how I solved it was by going to the authorities, but then for me, it was a case of extreme sexual harassment. If this is just a social drama you're dealing with, that has no solid grounds for going to the authorities, then you have a few options.

I always started with ignoring them, but when my vast patience ran out, I resorted to threatening (in a carefully worded way, mind you). Things like, "Say it again, and I'll make sure it's the last thing you say to slander me." This generally makes them wary and bright-eyed, eager to push the envelope again, and when they do, you can then take it to the authorities, and then you can present your case of harassment, bullying, and slandering to them. ^_^ See, you have to set up the potential for there being an official case that can be addressed by school rules, and when the idiots inevitably cross the line, they'll get fried by the Big Brother! You only have a case when you tell them to specifically stop bullying or harassing you (having a friend nearby to witness this is a good idea) and when they eagerly pursue this course of action you've asked and warned them to not continue, then you have a valid case that breaks the school rules and you can get the faculty on them. And if these people are as bad as you say they are, they're probably well known in the office already, validating your position as the victim even more. It's revenge by manipulation and working the system. :)

Additionally (and this should be done without any delay), remind yourself that you don't give two royal shits what they think. These kinds of people are like pond scum -- it proliferates alarmingly fast, feeds on fecal matter of other living things, and is nearly impossible to get rid of. A person of your standing passes biological byproduct more intelligent than they are. So when they come up to you and say "OMG I HEARD YOU SAID THIS BIT OF TRIVIAL GOSSIP!", the first thing you should do (aside from immediately suppressing the natural instinct to punch them in the face) is to say, 'And I should care why?'

I know that this reaction is difficult if your personal dignity and reputation are under assault. But keep in mind -- you already know how to manipulate them in such a way that if they utter a single word about your good name and reputation, you have already set them up so that it is an actionable case of harassment and bullying. So you have effectively guarded your own standing and integrity while ridding yourself of these humanoid parasites. :dave:

And thirdly, reflect on this drama bitch of the damned and consider that if she has any influence over those you consider 'friends' then those people are not your friends at all. The number of friends you have doesn't mean a thing if they are in it only for the drama and insanity. I only say this because I've been in such a predicament.

And lastly, know this: Just because you promised to move on and leave it alone doesn't mean that they ever will. These are parasites, remember -- they suck all the drama out of a soul until they've driven it to suicide or therapy. Each is equally bad. They have clearly not left you alone, and are still bringing the conflict to you. The obvious solution is to stop playing on their battle ground. Take the war to them. Spread false rumors if you must (or simply want to out of spite), but only well constructed ones that are neither provable, disprovable and extraordinarily damaging. Like saying, "Well, I heard that whoever's bf/gf was sliming some other person." See, you didn't actually witness it, so it can't be traced to you. You overheard it in the hallway one day, but didn't actually see who said it -- again, leaving no one to verify/discredit your purely false claim. And always -- ALWAYS -- leave that little bit as all you know. You know nothing else; no more elaboration, just a suggestion of some scandal. They will create the actual trouble themselves. This technique is what I like to call 'deflection'. You're essentially directing their attention to another set of railroad tracks that leads to nowhere, leaving them to careen wildly down the drama-coaster and leaving you alone. Trust me, they won't remember you in the drama feeding frenzy. But only do this if you're absolutely sure it will work. This kind of group is fairly stupid, so you can get away with it most of the time, but caution will make it work best.

So. There you have it. A few ways to deal with the situation. I hope this helps ya out some. ;))
 
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"Mind your own damn business!" also works if you don't feel like apologizing to people who have nothing to do with it. Nosy people are obnoxious and won't stop being nosy until someone tells them to mind their business. Screaming just gets the point across better and lets out some pent up aggression.
 
I think Dragon Mage laid it out perfectly well for you. All I have to add is that these are the type of people who think HS is the end all, be all. They think that if they control power in HS, they will always control power and think they can do whatever they want (be that spreading rumors, starting drama, causing others to be in conflict, etc).

They're trying to milk as much as they can out of the power they have been "given" in a sense. They want to make other people's lives hell because they know that outside of HS they aren't going to have ANY power over ANYONE, and if they try they're going to be conceived as bitchy, false, and arrogant. And no one wants that as a friend, and they won't get far.

I had to deal with them in HS. I think everyone has to. If they are making your life miserable, then you can do as DM said and deflect it back their way. If you aren't that type of person, try to ignore it to the best of your ability. If it doesn't work, get help from the faculty. There's not much you can do to talk reason into these types of hard heads, unless you want to beat the shit out of them - however, that is NOT a wise path to go down, and could lead to bigger problems.

Once you're out of that place, though, they'll lose their edge, they'll become powerless, and they'll realize that they shouldn't have been assholes.
 
I was wondering if someone would ever get a thread like this... considering who all we got.

I, after dealing with people like them in a semester (Thankfully, I don't talk to any of them now), and I figured out my own ways to deal with this.

First, offer your services as a mediator, as a peace-keeper. If your smart, and word it right, they'll figure out that it's not wise to start anything too serious. It'll keep the noise level down at least.

Secondly, treat them all equally. You show favoritism, it won't end well.

Beyond that, my methods spiral down more towards being an absolute ass-hole (and since I'm big enough and self-confident enough to know no one's going to pick a fight with me without thinking twice, I can do it), so I'm gonna stop there. Generally, it's a good idea to NOT punch them in the face, NOT to pay much attention to them, and if they attempt to start it on you, make it very clear you haven't done anything, you never have done anything, you never will do anything, and would you kindly get the fuck out of my face before I lose all self-control. (Works for me).

Besides all these helpful pointers, it's generally a good idea to form your own method, as everyone has their own way to deal with this stuff. Good luck man, and I hope we all helped!
 
I know it's hard to believe this now, but high school is a small part of your life and will be over before you know it. when that happends, those bitchy girls will not matter. College is the best years of your life because you will have more freedom. I could honestly care less about things that happened in high school.

Also, best thing to do is ignore or laugh at them when they start acting up. It will piss them off.
 
The highschool bitches are usually the ones who fail at life after school... Get pregnant with a man who will ditch them before the baby is born, will probably live in a caravan and will become a smoking whale.

Just think about that :D
 
What should I do? There's this friggin' hypocrite girl in my class who thinks she's the friggin' queen and goes around talking about people behind their backs, but when someone else makes a comment about her, she freaks out and gets people involved with stupid drama stuff, somehow gains everyone's respect and turns their friends against them.

Ahhh I remember those kind of people in high school., That's a common trait of any drama queen.
Unfortunately, there's no way of avoiding that kind of crap besides dismissing it and letting it boil over.
And really, that's the appropriate thing to do, anyways. Girls like that typically self-destruct at some time or another. She'll find herself hellbound before too long.
I saw it all the time in HS. I was one of those stoners. We see everything.
EVERYTHING :awesome:
 
What a lot of people have already said is right. At this age, friends and people in general (in your age group) tend to matter the most. And so what they say, what they do can have a frustrating and sometimes devastating impact. The absolute best thing you can do, right now, as irritating as it seems to be at the moment is to just ignore what is being said about you. I understand that for some folks its just absolutely impossible for them to keep their mouths shut and end up saying one little thing, one word and in turn fuels the fire. When people say things about you, whether they're true or not, chances are they're doing it in order to get a rise out of you. If you respond to those comments, even making what seems like a harmless response can put you down to their level or even worse. You are no better than those people who you think are acting immature or ridiculous because you are participating in the very situation by saying something in return.

I've had the pleasure to be in high school as both a student of students and a student of the teacher. It's amazing how much of a difference 7 years makes. I am about that age apart from the seniors and let me tell you, those guys were almost worse (in some ways) than the freshman who you kinda expect to be immature. There was a guy and a girl in my senior class who were at each other's necks constantly. Whenever the girl was conversing with her classmates, the guy would eavesdrop and butt in. She didn't like that and gave him the glaring of a life time, making little comments about how annoying he was and then whining to me about how he wouldn't "grow up". I found it humorous being on the other side, looking at it from a different view. This other girl would join in, attempting to be a referee when really she would end up defending the girl and opening her mouth, too. We split them up eventually in hopes that would solve the problem. It did, for a little while, but there were times when they still went at it and I had to mediate.

Like I mentioned before, no matter how much you think denying whatever was said will actually solve the problem, you have to realize that it will not--in most cases. Teenagers are social creatures and friends and gossip and chit chatter and knowing things about people even if they're true or not is a major part of their life. I know because I was a teenager 6 years ago. I know because I, too, went to high school. I went to two different high schools and they were exactly the same in terms of there existing social groups, gossip, nasty kids who just have problems, etc. It's sad really. Some grow out of it, some don't. But I think and know for a fact that if you do not give them anything to feed off of that the situation will eventually go away.

Someone says something about you ---> that information is spread through gossip and the "telephone" game ---> that information eventually reaches you ---> ??? Those question marks are you, obviously, which is where you have some choice in the mix. You can either a) respond, or b) ignore and go about your business. It's really up to you. I'm not saying if you ignore that the problem will go away immediately. In fact, it won't. It'll probably get worse, especially if someone is just trying to get a rise out of you. That person will do everything in their power to achieve that goal. However, for teenagers at that age, I know that if the resistance is there and it upholds, if there is a legitimate barrier presenting itself and it doesn't look like it's going to budge (i.e. you not 'fueling the fire'), it is very, very likely the chatter will die and their focus will aim somewhere else.

Plus, the good thing is one only really has to endure high school for 4 years. While it may seem like forever at the moment, you will look back in 5 or 6 or 7 years and say to yourself, "man, those people were such a joke. I can't believe I played into that," if you're smart enough, that is. The decision is yours.
 
Oh this crap bothered me to no end in high school, but at least I was never actually involved in any of it. I did see it on a near daily basis though.

Next time, you should probably just be like "Yep, I said it. Now get off my back". Hey, sometimes it's fun to get under other people's skin. Otherwise, You should just try to ignore as much of it as you can. Friends or not, if they confront you, just ignore them (unless they have your back and are trying to find out exactly what happened from you).

Seriously though, what more do you expect from high school girls? Watch anything on MTV and you'll see the same typical high school drama. It's complete and total bullshit, and people just need to get over themselves.

The world doesn't revolve around them, and in the big picture, they are nothing. That goes for EVERYONE who always starts drama, not just those prissy high school girls.
 
Laugh. Laugh at what a pathetic idiot she is. She's trying to get a reaction out of you and make you upset but if you just realise how pathetic it is and laugh at her, you'll really take the wind out of her sails. Or better yet, confront her and tell it like it is.

High school etc etc will go right out the window once you get to Uni. The people here are a lot more mature and yeah, you do get bitches but it's not nearly as bad as high school. If you act like a bitch, you're going to distance yourself from people because they don't want to be involved with petty high school issues at Uni where they're supposed to be transitioning into responsible adults. It's a change of mindset more than anything.

As long as you have a group of good mates then you should be able to easily put it to the back of your mind. Not reacting will just bore her anyway and she'll stop.
 
Good ol' high school. I had a few encounters with a few of those types of women. Strangely enough, they were all cheerleaders. I would, being the asshole I am, make sure to dig in where it hurt with snide comments. I would comment with, "wow, you should probably cut down on the Twinkies, I can see your fat jiggling around."

Very often they would brag about getting into college with their horrible GPA's and how they have money, and I didn't, to which I would only reply, "Have fun serving me my coffee in the near future". They wanted to major in fashion studies. :rofl:

If you can play the "intelligence" game, you can outsmart them and make them feel incredibly stupid. High school is a dog eat dog world, and the top dog has a big fucking brain. So while they may be bitches, at the end of the day, if you're clever enough to do it, you can completely tear them down. :griin:

Or you can just ignore it. But I like my way more. :mokken:
 
First off, let me say I have not been in High School for years, and for that I am truly grateful. When I was in High school I was one of those people who was never in any one particular clique. The fact is though that everyone else writes you into one, regardless. Things were bad when I was in school, but now they are much worse. Case in point: one of my friends was talking about her daughter who is one of the more popular kids in her high school and her altercations with a select few of the student body that has a huge axe to grind with her because of rumours about her "sex life" and a huge meeting was called and there was the possibilty of a good few people getting 5 day suspensions for spreading rumors and "talking smack" about each other. High school is VICIOUS nowadays...I am so glad that I am done with that short phase in my life.

Now, on to your problem. Some people talk smack because they apparently have nothing better to do with their time. Talking smack back is only feeding into their apparent need for attention. Belittling for some people makes them feel better about themselves. The trick is to not feed into it. HARD AS IT IS, and believe me, I know, you can't do it. Not only can it apparently get you in trouble like in my above mentioned story, but you are only degrading yourself personally. You need to rise above the triteness that is high school, and let the crap that people talk roll off of your back. People say that high school shapes part of who you are in the future, and I truly believe that it does. I used to have to deal with someone in homeroom when I was in High School and whom I went to church with at the same time who would sit there and talk crap about me quite loudly during those achingly long 15 minutes everyday for 4 years because he didn't like me because I liked his cousin (who also went to our church). It was hard all those years never saying anything back to him, but I instead kept my cool and let him look like the ridiculous loser that he was, since he was the one who had the problem, not me. I'm still grateful to this day that I did. We will always have people who talk about us in our lives, whether to our faces or behind our backs...you can take the words with a grain of salt, or you can stoop to their level and be no better than them. Hate reciprocates hate and you really loose either way.
 
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Thanks for your help, guys. I decided if she ever talks to me again, or one of her friends talk to me, I'll just burst into laughter and leave. But if she takes it to another extreme, I'll have to go to the school authorities and see if she's smiling then :)

Btw, in case you want some comedy on this drama girl who's involved here, just imagine: She looks almost exactly like Snookie, is the same height (four foot nine), but is more pale and wears glasses, doesn't have an italian accent, but has a combination of an italian accent with a southern accent. (sounds messed up) She always says "whatchas" when she types. Example: "You guys better stop whatchas doin or stuff's gonna happen" (quoted word for word what she said). I still have people coming to me on facebook everyone once and a while and freaking at me, but it's simmering down, and I've been telling people off (including this main Snookie hypocrite girl).
 
Good for you! Glad things are cooling down for you. Always remember the techniques listed on this thread for future reference, though. Or if you like, look up the internet swearing project for some truly creative insults! :D
 
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