Police of a New York suburban town, McDonaldland, have reported that there is corruption afoot in their local political offices. Apparently the mayor of said town was caught having sex with a newly hired intern inside a sleazy hotel near the outskirts of town. Suspecting trouble, the hotel's manager called the police immediately after a complaint was filed by a rather large man rooming nextdoor. When the police arrived, they barged into the room, to discover the mayor and his intern in a rather compromising potition. The young girl was said to still have the remnants of a yellow gooey substance on her face when she was escorted in handcuffs from the hotel room. The young girl, whose name has not been officially confirmed, is believed to be one E. Bird, as based on a yet uncashed check found in the hotel room. The signature of said check was none other than the mayors. Grimace, the large man who initially reported the disturbance had only this to say: "I can't believe I voted for that scum."
There you have it ladies and gentlemen, another case of corruption in politics. When will this tyranny ever stop!? It pains me to live in such a wonderful country that is stained by this filth!
There you have it ladies and gentlemen, another case of corruption in politics. When will this tyranny ever stop!? It pains me to live in such a wonderful country that is stained by this filth!

