Help needed, fellas

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Will Graham

Hello, Dr. Lecter
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So my sister was on the computer yesterday, on facebook of course. Anyways she went up to have dinner, so I decided to take the computer for a while, to look up some Mexican yahtzee porn

She had left her facebook open, and I noticed she had a chat open with one of her friends

Being a kind and Orwellian big brother, I happened to read whatever the last thing they had said to each other was

Her friend said something like goodbye

To which my sister replied "kk seeya ltr hun xx"

I have already started writing her 'suicide' note, but am unsure what to do with the body. I am torn between the tar pits outside of town, or burying her in a shallow grave by some old rail road tracks
 
Send her body to James. He will completely consume it.
 
burying her would be pointless if you made it look like suicide :hmmm: and the tar pits is a weird way for someone to kill themselves.

have her taken behind the chemical sheds and shot :grin:
 
They'll work out okay if the suicide note says something about not wanting to be found.
Leave some of her blood in her room.
 
I advise that you try your kill method on yourself first, you know, to make sure it works :hmmm:
 
He should try it twice to be sure its a definite hit. There can't be any room for error in this sensitive operation.
 
Dear familial units,

I have self terminated myself due to some teen girl bullshit type thing, you know what I mean, watch the O.C. or something. Nonetheless I digress, post-termination I hired some Mexican labourers to ship me round the world, endlessly following Hannah Bieber and Justin Montanna round because oh em jee they are so great

Naturally you will suspect Conor because he is so handsome and covered in my blood, do NOT investigate those suspicions

Yours, girl child
 
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