Serious To give up or not to give up ? That is the question..

[Ashe B'nargin]

Four or three years ago. Knew this young man at High School. We were great friends, but had a small crush on him. However him being more keen on Video Games and such he always got picked up and bullied by others. Before High School ended- he said that he was going to leave and focus more on a sport scholarship or maybe music..

.. He had enough of High School..


Years have gone by and still think about him. Did met a male-friend until he left weeks ago last month. But we were just friends we had a good friendship and miss him as a Friend..
But this old Friend from High School still think about strongly.


But the sad thing is when the High School crush left. Didn't really say goodbye to him.
Was too scared/ shocked and really regret not saying anything to him. But the words just wouldn't come.

But just wonder if should really give up on this man and maybe move on and find somebody else or just wait for him for return and maybe try and find him after the money- recession is over and maybe after College ?

Remember in High School how a Teacher was reading a book how a man waited until he was in his mid-60's for his lover to return and she asked us- '' How many years, would you wait for love '' ? and of course put the hand up and called out-'' At least one million years... '' XD

But now thinking that focusing too much on the past isn't healthy mentally..
But also think that it's strange that still thinking about him for about 4 odd years...

What to do ? Should give up on this guy ??

 

[Big Casino]

IM not really the best at giving this kind of advice, but il tell you how i see it.
What if he comes home you see him and hes not interested in you at all, or maybe hes in a relationship already, or even married. You will be setting yourself up for a huge blow if you wait around years for this guy to come back only for him not to want you like you want him. I would say move on and look for someone else, id personally avoid the possibility of getting really hurt and upset at all costs.

 

[Erazor]

This aint sum sick thing ppl do is it just to get attention is it, if not then i'll say sumthin.

yea i'm going tho the same thing atm, i just don't know what to do either its fckin hard what 2 say or do lol but i know she's the 1 for me ^^ (this aint njo joke)
just go 4 it what can he say yes or no whats the worst that can happen?

hope u do it for every1 that's like us ><

 

[Shu]

Alright I'll offer a simple and blunt solution. Don't take this the wrong way or think it is too cold, but here it is.

Move on. If you believe in a thing called Fate, then he will be coming around. Life works in a circle most of the times, and we are given moments of opportunities to act on them, but the opportunity is out the window really now.

Four years is way too long. Most likely if the kid didn't finish high school then he had it rough, that is reality.

Don't kid yourself either, I believe in chivalry to a degree, but it is all primarily character these days. I'm sure he did not hold out. I'm sure he moved on. Just remember if he didn't have the same feelings for you, it would be totally one sided. If ya'll never had anything at all in general, say a relationship. There really is no point to hold out on a crush.

Crushes are the purest form of puppy love. It is all they will be. They are meant to teach us that we can't always have what we want.

 

[blakstang98]

Well, I think the question you need to ask yourself is, is he coming back any time soon? When you say you heard the question in class, "how long would you wait for your love?", I personally don't think it's worth waiting a really long time. I'm not trying to be negative, I just think that dwelling in the past is something that will only make you depressed. I know the love of my life is unavailable to me, but I can't just wait for her to be available, so I moved on.

Try and look at it this way, you may have some feelings for this guy, but what makes you think you can't feel more feelings for someone else that you can be expressive too? At least give dating with someone else a try. Your feelings for the guy your dating may overcome your feelings for the past guy. Then again, you may realize that your feelings for the past guy are too strong.

I say you give dating a try, then if the other guy does come back, you can express your feelings to him. If the guy from the past doesn't feel the same way, then you'll know and you can completely move on. But I do think holding on to the past isn't a great idea, but then again, you know the situation better. Use your best judgement and you'll be fine. Best of luck!

 

[SaShman]

Ok I'm going to try to look at this situation as realistically as possible. So I might come across little harsh.

Four or three years ago. Knew this young man at High School. We were great friends, but had a small crush on him. However him being more keen on Video Games and such he always got picked up and bullied by others. Before High School ended- he said that he was going to leave and focus more on a sport scholarship or maybe music..

.. He had enough of High School..


Years have gone by and still think about him. Did met a male-friend until he left weeks ago last month. But we were just friends we had a good friendship and miss him as a Friend..
But this old Friend from High School still think about strongly.

I could have misinterpreted this, but judging by the way you phrased that, it sounds like you haven't seen him for three to four years. If that is the case, I suggest you move on. Seriously, a lot can happen in that amount of time, he may have found someone else or he could be a completely different person now.

But now thinking that focusing too much on the past isn't healthy mentally..
But also think that it's strange that still thinking about him for about 4 odd years...

What to do ? Should give up on this guy ??

It's not really strange that you are still thinking about him, you said yourself that you guys were great friends. But I'd seriously suggest you move on. As I said before, people can change a lot over four years and from my perspective you seem to just be basing these feelings off a high school crush. If you two haven't kept in contact over the past four years, there is quite a good chance that you will not see each other again. My advice is to let it go.

 

[Estella Vanilla]

So you don't know if he moved away or not? Don't you have his full name? You can look up his phone number and give him a call, facebook him, myspace, IM anything?

I mean I don't see why you can't get into contact with him again and just talk to him for a bit and see if you still feel the same after talking to him. Maybe he has a girlfriend now? Who knows.

But don't let this restrict you from seeing other people. <-important

 

[Sirsparrow]

I think you should hold onto the crush. Crushes are fun to keep, no matter how realistic/unrealistic they are.

When you find someone you like a bit more they'll quickly overtake him. But I wouldn't obsess about this guy.

But who knows. In a few years down the line you could always tell him whne you see him.

 

[Ashe B'nargin]

Thanks for the advice. No the advice wasn't harsh. It was realistic and kinda needed reality to come back again. No lost his E- Mail address during a computer crash not long after he left and both of us were never really into the whole Bebo and Myspace craze. XD

But going to move on and leave the past behind but still keep the memories. He was quite talented at music and have a feeling that could end up hearing his songs in the future..

If he is married right now or already dating will want to be glad for him. Because as longs as he is happy and with somebody that really cares about him. Just would like for him to be happy..


If we meet again one day. Marriage/ Date or no date. Will be happy/ grateful just for the chance to see him again. But if we don't then guess still have those wonderful memories. Something that somebody else or fate can't take away.

But yeah. Going to give up on hoping.