Social norms that do your head in

[Linnaete]

Or in other words: do you find any ordinary societal expectations and customs that you're expected to do to be particularly unpleasant, irritating, galling or downright unnecessary that to this day you still have no idea why we still practise it?

Here's my first answer: I don't like shaking people's hands, especially if it's a stranger who I'm meeting for the very first time.

Look, I don't know who you are, much less what your daily routine is and what bathroom rituals you perform. Personally I am very particular when it comes to personal hygiene, erring on downright germaphobia half the time. This person whom I'm shaking hands with because it's just a social norm that we are subconsciously conditioned to do may not have washed their hands all day. Maybe that hand has been to unspeakable places and has yet to be thoroughly scrubbed down with soap since. Mayhap this person heads straight out the door the moment they flush the toilet. Conceivably they could have a cold virus and have been coughing or sneezing into their hand for the entire day. Cold and flu season and I find myself having to shake hands with someone who looks like they could faint from the flu any moment now? I may as well take the next week off.

How about you lot?

 

[Dionysos]

I certainly agree with you on that one! ^^^ To add to that, I hate it when I'm washing my hands at a public toilet and I'm aware of other people walking out behind me without even looking at the sink. Not just from the urinals, but the cubicles as well... They are people I don't know and I'll never need to shake their hands, but by extension that means that I've very likely shaken someone else's hands who has done this.

The germs aspect aside, I'm also a little lost with handshakes these days. On the one hand I've never had a firm handshake because I've always respected that other people probably appreciate their circulatory systems not being disrupted, or people might have sore hands or not want the bones of their fingers to be squeezed together. And yet much of the literature on how to present yourself as a smart, respectable individual of means in a competitive world tells you to give a firm, confident handshake. I can't connect the two. In my quest to be the best I can be for myself without harming another soul, I struggle with that - but maybe I'm weird.


As for urinals.... I really dislike them. I know a lot of men aren't fond of standing there, exposed, with their pet snakes out with a row of other men also standing there doing the same. It's just weird. People were expecting to be out shopping / at the cinema / on a day trip, etc - not entering into a porno shoot... I appreciate that time is saved having people able to quick-fire and get out rather than having to walk into a cubicle, close the door, lock the door, then go, etc... But is it worth it? You can tell a lot of people get embarrassed when it is busy and there are men either side of them and a lot of other men are waiting behind them for their turn. Do you look to the ceiling and look like an idiot enjoying himself? Do you look down at your own and hope others don't think that you are looking at theirs with sideways glances? Do you look forward at the wall and read the posters? Do you close your eyes and risk everything going wrong? Sometimes it stops working and you can no longer go. I sometimes notice that people give up and walk into a cubicle because at least there they will have the peace of mind.
I wonder if one day people will look back on urinals in the way that we look back on Roman latrines...