My dear pal

[Will Graham]

Toshiya

So my extended family was over today, aunts, uncles, and cousins. My mam hid the SCART and HDMI leads, because I was going to spend the day in my room with the PS3. So I was forced to interact with that familial cunts

A particularly doe-eyed cousin convinced me to play chasing with her and a few of the other younger kids. After proving that being four times their age granted me superior athletic abilities, I went back inside. Mainly because I was out of breath, the only exercise I have gotten in the last ten years is wanking to Jeremy Kyle and stealing my dad's cigarettes

I ended up sitting beside one of my uncles, and chatting about music. His eclectic and old taste dwarfed my pseudo-hipsterdom. Anyway he was telling me how back in the punk-rock era he used to do lighting for concerts. One night the band who was playing had no sound engineer (because he was too stoned), so my uncle ended up doing the lighting and sound for them. Afterwards he was chatting to the bassist backstage for a while


Now I am sure you are wondering what this has to do with you in particular, I have not told you the band's name yet to build up tension. They were,























































































































































































The Sex Pistols, meaning the bassist was... :licky:

 

[Marquis of Granby]

...shit?

like the rest of the "band"

 

[Will Graham]

Ah but James, she is in love with him

She even has a poster of him above her bed

 

[Marquis of Granby]

mhm. no doubt.

 

[Will Graham]

And she loves the film Sid and Nancy, which I may watch

 

[Marquis of Granby]

do not.

 

[Will Graham]

It has Gary Oldman though, an excellent actor I'm sure you agree

 

[Marquis of Granby]

of the parts ive seen him play i can say that he played them well

 

[Squid]

Every single member of your family seems to have met some awesome cool band member something is fishy

 

[Marquis of Granby]

its called bullshit. and its not fishy. its shitty.

 

[Will Graham]

Two is not many considering my brother's girlfriend is not family

Is this because you have never met anyone you saw anyone from the magical box in your cave out in the wasteland?

 

[Marquis of Granby]

mhm aha

 

[Will Graham]

You are so clever, James

 

[Donald Trump]

Actually the bassist was probably Glen Matlock.

 

[Will Graham]

He told me it was Sid, then again I have no idea if he was telling the truth

I think he was but I cannot be sure

I asked was it Sid, then admonished myself saying he was dead by then probably (I do not know much about the band) and he said no Sid was there, then he told me about their sound man being stoned

 

[Donald Trump]

Sid was like a groupie, except he did not have sex with any band members. He followed them about and started fights in the crowd.

 

[Will Graham]

I take it you have heard about when he met Freddie Mercury

 

[Donald Trump]

He called him a poof then punched him.
Or,
he called him a poof then fucked him.

 

[Will Graham]

Wessex Studios, summer 1977. Queen are hard at work on their sixth album. In a neighbouring studio, the Sex Pistols are putting together Never Mind The Bollocks.... "So you're the bloke that's supposed to be bringing ballet to the masses?" asks a sneering Sid Vicious during a brief encounter in the conjoining corridor. "Ah, Mr Ferocious!" pipes back Freddie Mercury, "well, we're trying our best!"

Basically

 

[Big Casino]

...shit?

like the rest of the "band"

lmao i was gunna say this. Sex pistols are pure shite.