Poetry My poem

[Twit]

Oh well here goes....


How we love the worlds we can explore
The characters we all adore
The might blade, the shiny shield
This is what we must wield

Every moment, you stare death in the face
Before it wipes the varied race
Before the fight you must speak true
You only ever rely on you

The fight may start, the fight may end
But there is a message you must send
To all those worried you must say
Heaven is not that far away

Please tell me what you think and don't lie, i can take it

 

[Cyannie]

awesome!

 

[eisprinz]

Not bad. The meter is a little shady at the beginning, but it starts getting better rhythm toward the middle. I like the iambs in the last stanza - I think that's probably the best kind of meter for what you're writing about, anyway.

 

[Twit]

Thank you both. As i said though i only wrote this because i got bored, but i'm also writing a book.

 

[Mitsuki]

Wow, that's really good, actually. I feel like there's a hidden message, what with the way you wrote it. xD Bravo!

 

[Scooter1900]

only u cud write somethin that deep aye twit *Im only screwin the wheel* lol

 

[Twit]

HAHA cheers loads mate. And thank you mitsuki

 

[Scooter1900]

o i done the 1 part of weapons for the book btw

 

[Twit]

Nice one mate. Thank you for helping me on that.

 

[Dark-Angel]

Not bad. as said before, the rhythm in the first verse is dodgy, but yeah the rest is quite good.

Could you tell me what you think of mines...https://www.finalfantasyforums.net/index.php?threads/13044/