Serious Essay on me

[SapphireStar]

Lol, dont know why I open up on here all the time. I guess people on here dont judge others by their problems and wish to offer advice.

I dont know what to do at the moment. Im in a part time job I dont enjoy as much as I thought I would.

Im a uni drop out. And want to go back to university maybe this September, but I know I wont be able to afford more laons from the loan company I used last time.

Ive started feeling angry that I found out my first boyfriend had gotten into a new relationship and even had a serious one after me. I wanted to be serious with him, yet he said he wasnt ready. But he was for the next one. Now he has another girl who happens to be married.

I dont see any of my old friends like I use to and they all stil see each other. Its money and location that make it hard. Yet they plan trips to London, etc. Im not the most social person. I barely see friends outside work and beside my family, my boyfriend is the person who sees me the most.

Im happy in my relationship and we want to move in together this year. But he wants a better job first. But from the way things are at the moment, its not going to happen. Nowhere will employ him and its like a dream that isnt going to happen. Plus he gets upset if Im upset and lately, we've both been depressed and down.

I just dont know what the hell to do with my life. Im wasting it at the moment and I'll look back when Im older and think Im a miserbale cow, but the smallest thing can trigger me to get upset. I'll never be a writer, talented or rich. Its like everything I have is just fantasy and dreams that would never happen in reality, no matter how much I try.

You probably think Im some sad cow who has nothing better to do then moan. My family hate it when I try and talk to them and tell me to grow up. I grew up years ago and sadly I have nothing to show for it. Sorry for the rant guys, Ive needed to get this out. It was driving me mad.

And Im getting that annoying sever busy message. FUCK OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Jack's Smirking Revenge]

Lol, dont know why I open up on here all the time. I guess people on here dont judge others by their problems and wish to offer advice.

Most people find it easier. xD

I dont know what to do at the moment. Im in a part time job I dont enjoy as much as I thought I would.

You've probably already thought this over, and it is an obvious solution: get another job.

Im a uni drop out. And want to go back to university maybe this September, but I know I wont be able to afford more laons from the loan company I used last time.

Is that just an assumption that you won't be able to get the loan? The worst that can happen is they say no to you. Because of your age, you might have to get a normal loan (with interest) from your bank or somewhere similar.
I know you've commented on your family's thoughts on that before, but would they not be able to help you out financially with tuition fees and the like?

Ive started feeling angry that I found out my first boyfriend had gotten into a new relationship and even had a serious one after me. I wanted to be serious with him, yet he said he wasnt ready. But he was for the next one. Now he has another girl who happens to be married.

I know it's far easier said than done, but forget him. You're in a state where you're obviously very happy with someone else, so it'll be a lot easier to do that. Just look at what you have, and not what you could have had.

I dont see any of my old friends like I use to and they all stil see each other. Its money and location that make it hard. Yet they plan trips to London, etc. Im not the most social person. I barely see friends outside work and beside my family, my boyfriend is the person who sees me the most.

I actually know that feeling myself. I only see my mates from school every couple of weeks, if we decide to go up town one night. I do talk to some of them online occasionally, but we don't spend anywhere near as much time with each other as we used to. But that is because we're all always too busy. You should try and put some time aside to all get together.

Im happy in my relationship and we want to move in together this year. But he wants a better job first. But from the way things are at the moment, its not going to happen. Nowhere will employ him and its like a dream that isnt going to happen. Plus he gets upset if Im upset and lately, we've both been depressed and down.

Can't help there, I'm afraid, but it does look like you'll both have to wait it out until you can afford to live together.

I just dont know what the hell to do with my life. Im wasting it at the moment and I'll look back when Im older and think Im a miserbale cow, but the smallest thing can trigger me to get upset. I'll never be a writer, talented or rich. Its like everything I have is just fantasy and dreams that would never happen in reality, no matter how much I try.

Everyone goes through periods when the future looks horribly bleak, and this seems to just be your time. Try and keep your chin up and look at the positives and eventually you'll get a bit of luck and everything will get brighter for you.

 

[Vincent Crescent]

I know you might be told this all the time, but you gotta look at the positives in your life. You've got your family and your boyfriend, as well as some friends, even if you rarely see them. I can understand why you're getting depressed, everyone does at some point in their life.

First things first, decide what you want to do. If you truly want to go back to university, do it. If you're from England (which I think you are), the new laws and rules make it a lot easier for paying back. I'm currently at uni, and we only start paying back once we earn over £15k. This applies to everyone applying to university now, so your money status isn't taken into account. You'll also get bursaries and other similar forms of money based on your household income, and that you'll now be called a mature student.

If you don't really want to go to university, decide on a job you'd like to do. Have a look around the area for available jobs, if you're unable to think of a job you'd like to try. Who knows, it might jump out and grab you!

Your previous boyfriend is a jerk. I mean, who says they're not ready for a serious relationship and then goes and gets in one the next time around? I'd say give him a piece of your mind, but I don't know if that would actually help or not.

As for only being able to open up on here, well, great! Opening up anywhere is a good sign for anyone, it means you have the chance of receiving advice from people, especially if you enjoy talking to them.

Try not to force your worries on your boyfriend. He clearly loves you, but make sure you check if he actually enjoys his current job before he moves on quickly. If he regrets his decision to change job, it could affect your relationship!

As for your friends, well it sounds like you do better online at talking and such. So arrange a day out through your emails. Or if you've got them on myspace/facebook, get a hold of them there and see if they're up for anything.

Hope at least some of this advice helps you!