Love Satisfaction

Aztec Triogal

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Who'd a thought we'd see a love topic not made by Warbourne :P

I'm curious to know how many of you are happy once you're in a relationship? It sounds like a stupid question but I know a lot of people who really struggle to find that perfect person... and one of the major reasons for that is because when they get with someone, they're just not happy with that person.

They either seem to pick people that are totally incompatible with them or they're very "I want what I can't have" kinda people. And when they get what they've desired for so long, they no longer want it. I'm kinda guilty of that but I'm greedy and would have the world if I was allowed to take it. If you gave me a blonde, I'd ask for a brunette and a redhead just to try them all out.

There are a lot of people out there though that I could find myself happy with. However, I'm not someone who wants to settle for anyone who isn't completely compatible with who I am. And there's a lot more women out there that I care about and would like to be with short-term than there are women I could marry and spend the rest of my life with. Most of the time the division is pretty clear for me, although it doesn't win me any brownie points with women in general.
 
I have been happy in my past relationships and my current one. But the last one kinda has scared me mentally and Im finding it difficult to relax even though its 6 months this month *touch wood*

My boyfriend has never been in a proper relationship before and hes just abit unsettled with us. He is use to being alone and not opening up with feelings, but we are getting there slowly but surely.
 
i've only been happy once...
usually it's fine for 2-3 days, but then the fire just starts... dying...

and then it's over after 10 days or something... and well, i'm usually the one left heartbroken..

perhaps i'm the one to blame.. i usually get "complaints" that i game too much(if you call 4-5 hours per day much) but meh, if you want a relationship with me, you'd have to be prepared to take my gaming with it, i'm not gonna give that up for a girl...

corrently i am... "working" on a getting a relationship with a girl i consider extraordinaire... i've never felt like this before.. perhaps it's a sign?
 
I dated a gamer and I put up with his gaming for over 3 years. But after awhile, it does become tiresome and it was recking the relationship as he constantly had to train for tournments nonstop. I tired my best to put up with it, but it drove me to the brink of madness.
 
I thought I was happy in all my relationships before, but they always used to get irritated by my problems in life, I cant help having a shitty family life, it just seems in big familes there is more likely to go wrong, my family's medical history isnt the best ever and I have a high chance of falling under the same category, and no one seems to understand I have alot to deal with, but then Kirsti came along and accepted me for who I am and not what they wanted me to be, I fell in love properly for once but now it looks like it is failing...
 
My current boyfriend has had problems with himself and family for years and I have been told that it would be good for him if I left him, yet it would also destory him. I cant win. I care about the guy alot and even though its only been 5 months, I have strong feelings for him.

I dont want us to spilt up, but I think if we do, it'll be him who does it. He is alot happier since we had a serious chat where we spitl up and got back together that night and is getting in contact with his feelings for me. He finds it difficult as hes never had to do this before.
 
I find it difficult to find a woman who carries the same interests as me. And that's probably why both of the major relationships in my life have failed. The first one was promising. We were pretty compatible. She liked video games, gettin high, listening to metal, and she was HOT! Then she quit smokin weed, started listening to hip-hop, and quit playing video games. We were together for 6 years before I finally broke up with her. We just couldn't get along. She didn't like the music I was playing on my guitar, she wanted me to quit smokin weed, and she wanted me to give up Final Fantasy. We were arguing at least twice a week. 3 weeks after I broke up with her I found a different woman. We were not compatible at all. She listened to Tejano and Norteno (music sung in Spanish here in Texas). Never played video games, and didn't care if I smoked. In the 2 years I was with her we got into 2 arguments. But she was 17 years older than me and she treated me more like a kid than as a boyfriend. I had to get away from that as well. Now I'm dating a woman who is just like the first one. I'm a little afarid that we will end up just like in scenario #1. I like this girl a lot and I'll just have to see how it turns out.
 
I'm not sure about the women you've dated or you specifically... but just as a general rant your situation #2 pisses me off. I hate when guys and girls don't get along at all and yet they stay together for some unfathomable amount of time. 2 years seems like a lot for a decent relationship but for a crappy one... why? I'm sure there were other guys that came along that would've loved to have dated her but she was "taken".

And it's interesting how much people change over the course of a relationship. Granted a lot of stuff always stays the same... and they always seem to be pet-peeves but a lot of the major things about a person really seem to alter throughout a relationship.

I've always imagined relationships to be like large balls of yarn that were just rolled across the ground. They don't have to start off anywhere near one another or even necessarily be rolling toward one another... but as they roll out, the way they unweave and the bumps in the road they're rolling on determine where they roll to next. And if two balls of yarn happen to roll parallel to one another for a portion of time, the yarn that is laid down connects to one another. The longer they roll side by side the stronger that connection becomes. The yarn being laid down eventually becomes one big strand produced by the two rolling balls. At any point, due to the way the balls unravel or the topography of the road they're traveling on, the balls may be pushed farther from one another... but if those bonds are strong enough the balls will always roll back together. If not, the balls will roll apart. They will always be tethered together to some degree but that tethering won't necessarily affect where it rolls in the future.
 
I dated a gamer and I put up with his gaming for over 3 years. But after awhile, it does become tiresome and it was recking the relationship as he constantly had to train for tournments nonstop. I tired my best to put up with it, but it drove me to the brink of madness.

well, i don't do tournaments...
i'm an amateur gamer, all i ask is my daily portion of gaming... at least 3 hours(2 on a schoolday)... then all my attention can go to my GF

i used to be a 10 hour per day gamer... but seriously, that's only outside of relationships...
i do respect my GF, unlike your BF did then

i guess i was just (un)lucky to get the types that want every little bit of your attention and don't want to share you with anything or anybody else(friends or games in my case)
 
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I'm not sure about the women you've dated or you specifically... but just as a general rant your situation #2 pisses me off. I hate when guys and girls don't get along at all and yet they stay together for some unfathomable amount of time. 2 years seems like a lot for a decent relationship but for a crappy one... why? I'm sure there were other guys that came along that would've loved to have dated her but she was "taken".

And it's interesting how much people change over the course of a relationship. Granted a lot of stuff always stays the same... and they always seem to be pet-peeves but a lot of the major things about a person really seem to alter throughout a relationship.


We stayed together because we were high school sweeties. Another thing we had in common was that we were each other's first loves. Everytime we got mad at each other we would make up quite nicely (oh how nice it was;)). It was like we couldn't live with each other, but then again we couldn't live without each other as well.
 
I've only had one relationship in person...it was with a girl i met at my old job a few months ago, wasnt the prettiest girl but she was really cool to talk with and hang out with, and she wanted to go out with me so i was like "okay, sure." I was kinda hoping the personality would make up for lack of prettiness...and at first things went okay...then i found out she was a complete psycho. She acted like she was all vampiric and had "bloodlust" to sound cool, and then she took it to a whole new level...she asked me to start carrying a knife around so i could cut myself so she could get blood. I was rather aghast at that, so i asked why couldnt she just cut herself if she wanted blood...idiot said she was afraid of the pain. I told her any real gf with real bloodlust would rather cut themselves than ask their bf to do it, so i broke up with her (there were other things too, but that was the final straw).

So now i'm going out with a girl i know in California i've known for a year and 3 months. Yeah, it's long distance, but she makes me really happy. We've liked each other for a long time, but a couple weeks ago we finally decided to officially be bf/gf. We have music taste in common, and we think alike, she isnt much of a gamer and isnt much into movies, but that really doesnt hurt anything. We're going to try to visit each other sometime in the next year, and once she turns 18 (she's 17) i'm planning to move her out here.

So um..yeah...there's quite a bit of satisfaction in my relationship right now ^_^
 
I used to go through stages. I'd get lonely, want companionship, and once I found it then I'd find myself craving the freedom of being alone. Although I think ultimately the problem with that is that we were just never attaining a comfortable balance between spending time together and by ourselves. Not many people realize it, but distance from each other can be just as important in a relationship as spending time together because while you shouldn't be ignoring each other's needs, you also shouldn't be smothering them.

Overall, I'm the kind of person where when I have a bad day, or if something is bothering me and weighs heavily on my mind then the best thing to do is just leave me be, give me a few hours by myself to vent, go off on some video game, or otherwise sort it out and then I'm good. In fact, I'd say I'm someone who just needs that kind of freedom in his everyday life. Ultimately, right now where I'm at I don't even think I'm suited for, nor do I even possess the patience for getting into a relationship with some chick. I'm a man who's really enthusiastic over his hobbies. I like playing my video games, I like going off in a corner to read some book on my own. I have to get up at 3am for work and when I get home at noon I'd rather have my sleep than stay up all day with someone else. I don't have much patience for putting up with other people's drama, bullshit, or headgames. And honestly I hate the whole "Well fine, you can go off and do this but only if you come back and do this for me or with me later." sort of situation that EVERY single relationship I've ever either been in or witnessed between two other people always ends up degrading into. Fuck you, I'm not going to sit here and use a bartering system to be able to enjoy the things I enjoy doing. You'll respect me enough to take me "as is" and let me pursue the things I wish, and the same kind of respect will be extended to you in return. People can't seem to follow so simple a mindset. Perhaps my problem is just that I simply need to meet people who are more compatible with me. But I think overall at this point in life I'm simply just not in the proper kind of place or situation to be complicating things up with a relationship.
 
I don't believe in soul mates or perfect partnerships. Basically all you can do is "settle down". I have only dated 4 people in my life. My first boyfriend was a dupe; our relationship lasted 8 months though. My second boyfriend was a dick; but I stayed with him for the...benefits. My third boyfriend was the first guy that I was ever really infatuated with. It took me months to get over him; no years. I still loved him when I hooked up with my current boyfriend.

I have never been picky about my relationships. Typically I just wind up "falling into like" with someone...things happen...we wind up telling people that we're together. You know...
I've never gone after anyone...and I've never hooked up with someone who pursued me either.

I'm happy where I am now though. I've learned to move on and throw away my unnecessary emotional baggage. My boyfriend and I have a mutual love and attraction for one another. Respect, loyalty, yada yada.
I'm content with the person that I settled down with.
 
I don't believe in soul mates or perfect partnerships. Basically all you can do is "settle down". I have only dated 4 people in my life. My first boyfriend was a dupe; our relationship lasted 8 months though. My second boyfriend was a dick; but I stayed with him for the...benefits. My third boyfriend was the first guy that I was ever really infatuated with. It took me months to get over him; no years. I still loved him when I hooked up with my current boyfriend.

I have never been picky about my relationships. Typically I just wind up "falling into like" with someone...things happen...we wind up telling people that we're together. You know...
I've never gone after anyone...and I've never hooked up with someone who pursued me either.

I'm happy where I am now though. I've learned to move on and throw away my unnecessary emotional baggage. My boyfriend and I have a mutual love and attraction for one another. Respect, loyalty, yada yada.
I'm content with the person that I settled down with.

i know what you mea, by the bolded part... i've been through it once.. almost twice, but i managed to break away earlier the second time by completely shutting down my emotion..
i ran around emotionless for 2-3 months... i was like a zombie, i didn't do anything for gaming day in day out, happy i didn't have to go to school or they'd kick me out for being exceptionally rude
i didn't know happiness, sadness, love nothing, while it was great i did find out i missed some things this is the point where i tried loving once again
sounds a bit odd, i know, but it wasn't my choice, i was a wreck and my body took care of that

now i've found a nice girl.. and am hoping something will grow out of it, if not... so be it...
 
I've only been in two relationships in my life. The first one was good, but at the end he showed me how immature he was so we broke up even though we had the same interests (video games, movies, etc.) The second was great at first, but then something happened that showed me what kind of person he really was. Suffice it to say were not together anymore. So now, I'm a single gal, and I don't care. I believe that love will find you when it's the right time. No need to rush. You have to learn to be happy by yourself. Your personal happiness can't depend on somebody else.
 
You know reading this thread, actually depresses a lot. I have had very few girlfriends and in general the realtionships lasted a week because we were two different people. I used to delude myself into fancying different girls just because i knew they actually had a crush on me at the time. I knew fine well inside that it would never last because we were two completely different people. the longest relationship I've had is 2 weeks. The phrase "blindly in love" says it well.

All girls want to be with me now is friends. I mean i apprecate having great friends like them and I've asked them why I cant find the "one". They didn't know, they said I had everything. I am affectionate, caring, loving, romantic and loyal and even have a good sense of humor.
There was one girl back two years ago that actually cared for me in a boyfriend/girlfriend way, but she was forced to move down south to England because her dad had to move work.
I just dont know where i stand anymore when it comes to the mysteries of love.

The message of that is: Be lucky you have your boy/girlfriend. Love them, care for them and be loyal to them. There are others more lonesome out there. Only split up if you aren't meant to be.
 
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All girls want to be with me now is friends. I mean i apprecate having great friends like them and I've asked them why I cant find the "one". They didn't know, they said I had everything. I am affectionate, caring, loving, romantic and loyal and even have a good sense of humor.

Awww, well you're still pretty young (I assume you're 14). From what I've seen, teenage girls tend to be extremely shallow and date assholes and "bad boys." Of course, when those girls finally grow up and mature, it's people like you they want to date and marry, and all the bad boys are left all alone because, well, they're dicks. I'm sure it doesn't really do you any good hearing this now, but you'll definitely win in the end ;D


Bleh, as for me...I'm terrible at relationships. I hate commitment, so whenever I'm in a relationship, I feel like I've been handcuffed to someone. The thought of marriage is enough to send me into a panic attack. Someone once told me they wanted to marry me, and while I felt somewhat flattered, I mostly wanted to run the other way. I feel really bad, because it seems as though most girls always fantasize about their wedding day. I never understood that, so I feel like I'm kinda missing out on something.

My idea of the perfect relationship is something like friends with benefits. I had that with a guy. We would never go on dates or anything like that. We would mostly play video games together, make dumb nerdy jokes, and just hang out like friends. When we started dating, it turned into a disaster, and we just fought all the time.

I'll take a really good guy friend over a boyfriend any day.
 
I've always been happy in the beginning of my relationships. I digress, they were online. -_- That was one problem. Why did I go for online relationships? They just happened. I found a connection there, inexistent elsewhere.

The longest relationship I had was with a guy called Shaun. 8 1/2 months. I was happy for most of that time, and we met 3 times. But things became more detached. I felt suppressed and had too much pressure to go to Uni there, when the time came. He didn't trust me enough, either. I lost one of my best friends 'cause of Shaun's paranoia. Shaun thought I was flirting with Nathan, a friend of mine from the U.S. Because of this he felt threatened and basically told me that if I didn't block him, we'd be over. Things built up, and Shaun became less open minded about things too. I won't go into grave detail. Let's just say my love faded as things changed, and now he's disrespectful to me all the time.

The other relationship was with a guy called Chrisotff (Christopher). That relationship went well, for the whole 2 weeks... See, the problem was he doesn't have the 'net at home. He uses his friend's computer, and his friend went into full-time work. But I was so happy for those 2 weeks. =] I've often wanted to dance out of happiness yet I've not felt confident enough to do so. Christoff gave me that confidence, and he made me smile everyday. He made it so there was always "sunshine in [my] smile". ^_^


You know reading this thread, actually depresses a lot. I have had very few girlfriends and in general the realtionships lasted a week because we were two different people.

Don't feel depressed. You're only 14. :) At your age I hadn't even had 1 boyfriend. Trust me, as you and girls your age mature, things will get better and you'll have more meaningful relationships.
 
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I have only had what I would classify as 3 long term relationships, the first lasted a year, the second 5 years and the last one (which ended this year) 7 years. There was never a period of being single between them. It never gets any easier and that is why I try really hard not to give advice on matters of love.

Now I've moved back to my home town and am actually single again. I guess I thought it would be fun to sleep around a bit, have a few non-serious relationships and get on with life but I just have no desire to do so. I miss the companionship. When you meet somebody you are attracted to it feels great, over time it loses its passion and turns into somthing else, contentment. Now, as contentment isn't as sexy as passion you generaly want to re-kindle that initial feeling (which is usually the cause of infidelity).

It's only when you lose that contentment that you realise how much, much, much more important it is than passion.

Having said that, I met up with my first crush a couple of days ago (havn't seen her in 17 years) and she made me feel like a gibbering teenager. I doubt anything will happen, but I'd give my signed copy of FFX for a date with her! :)
 
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