I know this is a age-old topic that everyone has probably gone at least once in their life but i fell in love with my best friend. I can't be around her, her presence is intoxicating its like i can't breathe sometimes. I don't know what to do sometimes, so i stay away and bury my feelings. The reason im posting this is i want to hear (or read) some opinion or advice on this subject
Serious I love my Best Friend
- Thread starter ZiDane78
- Start date
- Tagged users None
*Serenity*
You can't take the sky from me
This can be a tricky situation. My best friend fell in love with me about 5 years ago, and we did end up dating for 2 years before splitting up. Luckily, we are still best friends to the day because our friendship was so strong before we dated. How long have you guys been friends?
If it really is as bad as you describe, I think you should tell her. If you don't, she will likely find out anyways because girls are much more perceptive than guys think when it comes to this stuff. And don't put any pressure on her, just tell her how you feel and see what she has to say. Maybe she's interested, maybe she's not. If she is, great, but if she isn't, you're going to have to move on. It will be hard, but at least you'll know you tried. If you truly are best friends, telling her this shouldn't mess up your friendship.
Since I've been in the reversal of your situation, I can tell you that I WAS a little weirded out at first when my friend told me and asked me out. I took a week to think it over, and decided I really did want to give it a shot. Even though we aren't dating now, I don't regret my decision one bit. We're stronger friends now because of it.
Lemme know how it goes=)
We been friends for about 2-3 years. I think she already knows (not sure). I want to tell her but i don't want to embarrass myself or sumthing stupid like that. The kicker part is i don't even feel confident enough to have a relationship with her even if she did like me. Maybe im just scared
*Serenity*
You can't take the sky from me
You really should tell her then. In person. You'll really regret it if you don't. Who knows, she ma want to go out with you! If that's the case, you SHOULD be confident. If she isn't sure, give her some time and space to think. And if she says no, well, at least you tried.
I had the same 3 years ago. It feels good at one side but at the other side it's just weird.
She was the first girl I fell in love with. I ended up telling her a few months later because I couldn't deal with it anymore. (jealousy was involved)
If it's already hard to be around her then you should definetely tell her, because you can't just go on like this. At first she'll probably be more distant after you told her because she needs the time to accept it, but after that you can have a good talk about it and see where it goes from there.
Good luck.
She was the first girl I fell in love with. I ended up telling her a few months later because I couldn't deal with it anymore. (jealousy was involved)
If it's already hard to be around her then you should definetely tell her, because you can't just go on like this. At first she'll probably be more distant after you told her because she needs the time to accept it, but after that you can have a good talk about it and see where it goes from there.
Good luck.
Just have a question for you, how old are you? I haven't exactly been in this siduation, since I've never fallen in love before. Just saying because I would say if you're around 13 and not in high school yet, I'd advise to wait. I've never seen a relationship between two kids in MS that has lasted for more than a month.
Good luck to you though.
Good luck to you though.
- Joined
- Dec 23, 2007
- Messages
- 4,919
- Age
- 35
- Location
- A bunker in Munich
- Gil
- 0
- FFXIV
- Unban James, he is innocent
- FFXIV Server
- Ultros
Only when it comes to shoes.
Kust ask her out. You'll have to do it eventually, so you may as well do it now, so that you can avoid what you're feeling now.
phantasmor
Blue Mage
hmmm it sounds like you are luckier than me, i have never felt that way about anyone even though i had a few i thought i should have and i never could figure out why i did not feel that way about them...... i have always said that if i ever felt that way i would tell them so go for it i am interested to hear how it goes
Well, here's what I would do.
Go and hang out with her, take her to a nice spot, and tell her how you feel. Don't be too quick with it, but also don't take too much time, find the right moment. If she feels the same way, great! If she doesn't, make sure that it won't affect your friendship.
Go and hang out with her, take her to a nice spot, and tell her how you feel. Don't be too quick with it, but also don't take too much time, find the right moment. If she feels the same way, great! If she doesn't, make sure that it won't affect your friendship.
Ok Thanks I want it to work to least try and see
MOD EDIT: Can we please put a little more effort into our posts. Single line posts are classified as spam, which is not allowed in this section, thank you. Further single line posts will be deleted without notice.
MOD EDIT: Can we please put a little more effort into our posts. Single line posts are classified as spam, which is not allowed in this section, thank you. Further single line posts will be deleted without notice.
Last edited by a moderator:
Good luck, I hope my advice works for you!
MOD EDIT: Can we please put a little more effort into our posts. Single line posts are classified as spam, which is not allowed in this section, thank you. Further single line posts will be deleted without notice.
MOD EDIT: Can we please put a little more effort into our posts. Single line posts are classified as spam, which is not allowed in this section, thank you. Further single line posts will be deleted without notice.
Last edited by a moderator:
- Joined
- Aug 28, 2007
- Messages
- 13,511
- Location
- Manchester
- Gil
- 224
- FFXIV
- Bambi Branford
- FFXIV Server
- Lamia
dude, youre 15.... marriage?! She has guys walking in and out of her life? Id assume she's also 15? So unless she's some little hussy, it's just the odd hand holding and dates for a couple of weeks before the next dude comes along. You're teenagers. This is what you do. Ruled by bloody hormones
You're infatuated, not in love, there's a maaaaassive difference. Sure tell her how you feel, it's better than brooding on it (easier said than done mind) but don't make a complete tit out of your self over it. Play it down a little and just say you think you like her abit more than friends
Declarations of love and marriage so soon would (hopefully) send normal people running
I said they can be, not that they always are
that made me laugh though.@OP: you're 15? i would hold off on the marriage bit. marrying anyone before you've fully matured usually spells disaster. in any case, get it out of your system and tell her before your logic is smothered by your hormones.
Just as a friendly reminder folks, this is a section for quality posts and not spammy single line posts, if we can refrain from that in the future. Thank you and carry on.
As for the topic at hand, I pretty much concur with what Bambi said a few posts ago. You're certainly not in love, you're basically just realizing now that you have an interest in women. You're realization of your sexual preference is basically making your homones rage when you're in the presence of a woman that you know and talk to frequently, with the thought that maybe she feels the same way. But you're certainly way to young to think about marriage. And love is something that gets mistranslated a lot, even by us older folks. I think it's just a crush.
I think telling her delicately would be a good idea. But nothing along the lines of love or marriage, just that you like her as more than a friend. Either she'll say she's not interested and you'll continue your friendship or she may have the same crush and you can start to date. But if you lay out the love and marriage thing, you'll scare her from being a girlfriend and a friend and she won't be a part of your life anymore. Losing a friend that way would be very painful, hence I advise against declaring love.
As for the topic at hand, I pretty much concur with what Bambi said a few posts ago. You're certainly not in love, you're basically just realizing now that you have an interest in women. You're realization of your sexual preference is basically making your homones rage when you're in the presence of a woman that you know and talk to frequently, with the thought that maybe she feels the same way. But you're certainly way to young to think about marriage. And love is something that gets mistranslated a lot, even by us older folks. I think it's just a crush.
I think telling her delicately would be a good idea. But nothing along the lines of love or marriage, just that you like her as more than a friend. Either she'll say she's not interested and you'll continue your friendship or she may have the same crush and you can start to date. But if you lay out the love and marriage thing, you'll scare her from being a girlfriend and a friend and she won't be a part of your life anymore. Losing a friend that way would be very painful, hence I advise against declaring love.
Ok I know what im going to do. Im going to show my Interest in her and if she feels uncomfortable, I am automatically backing off. If she does show a interest in me, I am seeing where this goes. But considering what guys have to say on this subject i am going a little easy on the words. (I wasn't planning on telling her that I wanted to marry her anyway). But Thanks for the advice guys (God I was going to do something stupid again) 
(God I was afraid of that)
(God I was afraid of that)
chronotrigger
Klim Dicnar (read backwards)
I have been in this exact same situation, twice. One worked out (sort of) and the other didn't, but I kept both as friends, to this day. I will say that even though I mostly agree with Bambi and blackstang98, I do want to add that infatuation isn't always what young people find. My grandparents and great-grandparents on my mom's side and her dad's side both found their true loves when they were 15 and 13, respectively. It can happen, albeit rare. I would definitely follow their advice, but I thought I would add that sometimes, it is actually true love. The only thing I would add to the advice is taking it slow is a good idea, but don't jump to conclusions later either. That is the fastest way to ruin a good friendship and a good relationship.
Since you are still young, if it lasts, give it a few years before making up your mind on whether you actually are in love with her. And make sure that you both find a way to keep your friendship either way. If it doesn't work out, at least you still have a good friend and you will have some extra confidence. Just don't rush, don't jump to conclusions, and keep the friendship part of it no matter what. It's not easy, but you will be glad you did.
Since you are still young, if it lasts, give it a few years before making up your mind on whether you actually are in love with her. And make sure that you both find a way to keep your friendship either way. If it doesn't work out, at least you still have a good friend and you will have some extra confidence. Just don't rush, don't jump to conclusions, and keep the friendship part of it no matter what. It's not easy, but you will be glad you did.