Tsukianei’s Review of Final Fantasy X (PS2)
Introduction – The few of you probably know me from one of my many posts bitching about something that is relevant to the thread title. Do yourself a favor, and don’t expect anything different from my review. I bought my PS2 with the soul intention of buying the next FF game that came out for it, and lo and behold I got it a few days after its North American release. You can’t imagine the excitement as I popped that bad boy into my PS2 and waited for it to load. I got to the menu, hit “new game”, and started to play what I believed was going to change the face of RPG’s forever, and you know what, I wasn’t wrong about it changing RPG’s, I was wrong for believing that it would be for the better.
This was the first, and hopefully last, RPG that I actually had to force myself to sit down and beat. To be honest, about the time you arrive at Luca, I knew that I was tired of it. Everything about this game was terrible. (At least in my opinion, but you know that already or else you wouldn’t be reading my fucking review.) The characters were awful, the voice acting was terrible, the battle system was so simple it was easy, the leveling up system was full of fail, and all of these will be addressed soon. All in all, this game was about as fun as being a one legged man in an ass kicking contest.
I suggest not reading any further if you’re a die hard fan of the game. Mainly because you’re probably going to spam my inbox with your opinion, that of which I’ll just laugh at and never reply to.
Why am I writing this review you ask? Not to troll, as anyone who has gotten to know me may think, but to inform. Everywhere I go, I see a review on how great this game is, how epic it is, and when I state that I don’t like it, people look at me as if I’m a triple breasted whore. It’s almost as if the term “bad” has never been applied to the term “Final Fantasy X”. So, here I sit, offering a much different view of a game that most of you seem to love.
Storyline – Most of you have played this game, but in case of the off chance of someone who hasn’t, I will try my best on not giving away any spoilers. In West Zanarkand born and raised in the Blitzball field is where Tidus spent most of his days. Whining, complaining, and relaxing all cool while shooting some Blitzballs at goal pool. When a giant fucking monster, who was up to no good, started destroying his fucking neighborhood. He got in one little fight and Auron got vague, and said “You’re moving with some idiots in another world.” He fell into some water and when he came to there was a fish trying to eat him which wasn’t very cool, when he escaped he complained “YO IT’S COLD IN HERE!” Then some funny dressed guys came and found him and said “BITCH YOU A FIEND!” Tidus had finally made it, he was finally there, to sit on the ground as an idiot of Spira.
Yeah, I just fucking went there. I Belair’d FFX, sure it wasn’t great, but you do better. Essentally, everything that I just said is pretty accurate. That’s how the story starts, and that’s about as interesting as the game got before I thought to myself, “how bland.” Yes, this story has been done before, and guess what, it’s going to be done many more times before the death of video games happens. I was expecting something original, and was left… Disappointed, vastly disappointed.
You go on to find out that there is a giant monster out to destroy the world (Godzilla anyone) and the only person that can possibly stop it is the Summoner, that can summon big scary monsters, and with her wooden stick, give you a very nasty series of splinters.
Accompanied by a generic group of characters, you guys go on to save the world while only running into two plot twists along the way. Plot twists that I might add, a person with an IQ on par with a monkey could have saw coming a mile away. The ending… was HILLARIOUS! Seriously, that part where Yuna runs to hug Tidus, but… Well, you know where I’m going. That part makes me burst into full on laugher for a good 10 minutes.
3/10 Boring, not great, not even average, just bad. It has poorly written dialogue, way too bland for a Final Fantasy game. The only thing that saved this from getting a “1” was the fact that it did manage to sneak in a couple of plot twists (as predictable as they were) and the ending that made me bust out laughing.
Characters – They all piss me off. They’re annoying and very generic and all of them have little to no character development, meaning that the attitude of the character when you first run into them doesn’t change much at all over the journey.
Tidus: The main character of the game. A star Blitzball player from Zanarkand, this little boy has some daddy issues. He loves to whine and complain, and he does it often! Borrowing his attire from the ideals of the young group “Cris-Cross” he wears his pants one pants leg up, one pants leg down. Easily has the worst attire in the- oh wait, I stand corrected. Wakka, whom of which I’ll get to later, has the worst attire in the game. Typically, he fails all around.
Yuna: The main female protagonist of the game. Yuna is that girl that is so sweet and whenever you see her, she just gives off that “I’m so nice and lovable” vibe. She’s the summoner of the game and the daughter of the summoner that defeated Sin (Godzilla) 10 years ago. She’s a klutz, and overall, actually not that annoying. (Yet, still annoying enough for me to hate her too.)
Wakka: ANNOYANCE FUCKING INCARNATE! How the hell can anyone like this douchebag? He’s annoying, has the worst voice actor ever, and over all fails at everything. His attire is the worst in the game due to the fact that it’s essentially fucking overalls and some stupid looking hairdo. Yet he’s the comic relief of the game. Always there to lend a hand, or a smile, he’s guaranteed to piss you off immediately.
Lulu: Local Goth chick that is trying way too damn hard to be dark, mysterious, and a badass. She’ll frequently look down on you, say some harsh things, while wearing all black, over exposing her massive “assets”, while performing Black Magic as your Black Mage. Oh, and get used to that annoying ass personality of hers, like I said, little to no character development, IT DOESN’T FUCKING CHANGE.
Khimari: What do I need to say about this guy? He’s… there. Utterly useless, he’s quiet, and… Useless.
Rikku: Annoying, but in a… slightly less annoying way than Wakka. She’s the thief, she steals things and is also the cousin of Yuna, and also Al-Bhed, but don’t tell Wakka that, because he’s racist!
Auron: The only redeemable character in this game. He’s pretty awesome, and wields a huge blade that will seriously give you a head splitting headache. (GET IT?! I made a pun!) Sporting the only good attire in this game, Auron shops at the AWESOME STORE!
The antagonists… If you can even call them that are Jecht (annoying), Seymour (what the fuck kind of name is that?), and Yu Yevon (practically non-existent throughout the game.) and Sin (Godzilla). None of which, upon learning their back story, can be rightfully classified as a true villain. They’re all just about as useless as a four cylinder engine in a motherfucking tank.
2/10 – Because you’ve all seen these characters before, only there were in just about every anime you’ve ever seen ever. Only, those anime’s did it better, and they did it with a little something I would like to call CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!... Also, class.
Gameplay – Fucking simple. You run, you fight, you “level up” and proceed with the linear as fuck storyline.
The battle system is so simple; it made the whole game terribly fucking easy. You get to see when your opponent is about to attack, and if you have even the slightest sense of strategy, you are able to kill all of your opponents without much difficulty at all. The only way you can really lose is by being under “leveled”. You might ask why I’m putting quotation marks around the word “level” in every variation. Replacing the leveling up system is the Sphere Grid, an un-clean, un-holy, beast that shouldn’t be there, because it sucks. You use it by moving a piece on the board in a monopoly type style around attempting to collect everything on it. After a while, you can have Lulu learning Auron’s skills on his sphere grid, completely throwing the concept of classes and jobs out the fucking window.
THE AIRSHIP SYSTEM!!! FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-! The overworld is gone. And you can’t control the airship, taking 98% of exploration in the game out of the question. Shit sucked, and made me cry when I first found out. (Now every FF game is going to be doing it. BAWWW!!)
4/10 – Because I feel like being a bloody git about it. It’s way to fucking easy, and things were removed that never should have been.
Controls – Not much to say here, they’re what they should be. Most RPG’s stick to the same control setup so I’ll go ahead and give it a 10/10.
Graphics – Not much to say about that either. Being the first FF on the PS2, of course the graphics were good, in fact, one of the only redeeming qualities about the game. Yet, I’m not too much into the graphics aspects of games as much as I’m into the overall quality. 10/10
Sound – Sucked to be quite honest. The music was not anywhere near close to Noboo’s other work. The battle music sucked, the boss music sucked, hell even the victory fanfare managed to suck, as well as the Chocobo music. Many people state that “To Zanarkand” is their favorite piece, probably because it’s the only good one. In my opinion, I couldn’t stand the music, and it is the only OST of a Final Fantasy game that I don’t own, because I simply don’t care to own it. 5/10
Unique features – Umm… Umm… I have to think about that… Blitzball? That was kind of fun. I guess… The monster creation thing? That got annoying really fast… Well, shit. That’s all I got for you on that part. 2/10 (Nothing unique at all about this game.)
REPLAY VALUE?! REPLAY VALUE?! WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU WANT TO DO THAT TO YOURSELF?! Are you asking for a death wish? If I could give it a -10/10, I would, but I can’t, so enjoy the 1/10.
Recap: Story: 3/10
Characters: 2/10
Gameplay: 4/10
Controls: 10/10
Graphics: 10/10
Sound: 5/10
Unique Features: 2/10
Replay Value: 1/10 (Non-existant)
Overall Score: 2/10 By this point, it shouldn't be a surprise what-so-ever about me hating this game. There is very little that I like about it, and the little I do like isn’t anywhere near good enough to cover up the things that I hate. That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it.
Introduction – The few of you probably know me from one of my many posts bitching about something that is relevant to the thread title. Do yourself a favor, and don’t expect anything different from my review. I bought my PS2 with the soul intention of buying the next FF game that came out for it, and lo and behold I got it a few days after its North American release. You can’t imagine the excitement as I popped that bad boy into my PS2 and waited for it to load. I got to the menu, hit “new game”, and started to play what I believed was going to change the face of RPG’s forever, and you know what, I wasn’t wrong about it changing RPG’s, I was wrong for believing that it would be for the better.
This was the first, and hopefully last, RPG that I actually had to force myself to sit down and beat. To be honest, about the time you arrive at Luca, I knew that I was tired of it. Everything about this game was terrible. (At least in my opinion, but you know that already or else you wouldn’t be reading my fucking review.) The characters were awful, the voice acting was terrible, the battle system was so simple it was easy, the leveling up system was full of fail, and all of these will be addressed soon. All in all, this game was about as fun as being a one legged man in an ass kicking contest.
I suggest not reading any further if you’re a die hard fan of the game. Mainly because you’re probably going to spam my inbox with your opinion, that of which I’ll just laugh at and never reply to.
Why am I writing this review you ask? Not to troll, as anyone who has gotten to know me may think, but to inform. Everywhere I go, I see a review on how great this game is, how epic it is, and when I state that I don’t like it, people look at me as if I’m a triple breasted whore. It’s almost as if the term “bad” has never been applied to the term “Final Fantasy X”. So, here I sit, offering a much different view of a game that most of you seem to love.
Storyline – Most of you have played this game, but in case of the off chance of someone who hasn’t, I will try my best on not giving away any spoilers. In West Zanarkand born and raised in the Blitzball field is where Tidus spent most of his days. Whining, complaining, and relaxing all cool while shooting some Blitzballs at goal pool. When a giant fucking monster, who was up to no good, started destroying his fucking neighborhood. He got in one little fight and Auron got vague, and said “You’re moving with some idiots in another world.” He fell into some water and when he came to there was a fish trying to eat him which wasn’t very cool, when he escaped he complained “YO IT’S COLD IN HERE!” Then some funny dressed guys came and found him and said “BITCH YOU A FIEND!” Tidus had finally made it, he was finally there, to sit on the ground as an idiot of Spira.
Yeah, I just fucking went there. I Belair’d FFX, sure it wasn’t great, but you do better. Essentally, everything that I just said is pretty accurate. That’s how the story starts, and that’s about as interesting as the game got before I thought to myself, “how bland.” Yes, this story has been done before, and guess what, it’s going to be done many more times before the death of video games happens. I was expecting something original, and was left… Disappointed, vastly disappointed.
You go on to find out that there is a giant monster out to destroy the world (Godzilla anyone) and the only person that can possibly stop it is the Summoner, that can summon big scary monsters, and with her wooden stick, give you a very nasty series of splinters.
Accompanied by a generic group of characters, you guys go on to save the world while only running into two plot twists along the way. Plot twists that I might add, a person with an IQ on par with a monkey could have saw coming a mile away. The ending… was HILLARIOUS! Seriously, that part where Yuna runs to hug Tidus, but… Well, you know where I’m going. That part makes me burst into full on laugher for a good 10 minutes.
3/10 Boring, not great, not even average, just bad. It has poorly written dialogue, way too bland for a Final Fantasy game. The only thing that saved this from getting a “1” was the fact that it did manage to sneak in a couple of plot twists (as predictable as they were) and the ending that made me bust out laughing.
Characters – They all piss me off. They’re annoying and very generic and all of them have little to no character development, meaning that the attitude of the character when you first run into them doesn’t change much at all over the journey.
Tidus: The main character of the game. A star Blitzball player from Zanarkand, this little boy has some daddy issues. He loves to whine and complain, and he does it often! Borrowing his attire from the ideals of the young group “Cris-Cross” he wears his pants one pants leg up, one pants leg down. Easily has the worst attire in the- oh wait, I stand corrected. Wakka, whom of which I’ll get to later, has the worst attire in the game. Typically, he fails all around.
Yuna: The main female protagonist of the game. Yuna is that girl that is so sweet and whenever you see her, she just gives off that “I’m so nice and lovable” vibe. She’s the summoner of the game and the daughter of the summoner that defeated Sin (Godzilla) 10 years ago. She’s a klutz, and overall, actually not that annoying. (Yet, still annoying enough for me to hate her too.)
Wakka: ANNOYANCE FUCKING INCARNATE! How the hell can anyone like this douchebag? He’s annoying, has the worst voice actor ever, and over all fails at everything. His attire is the worst in the game due to the fact that it’s essentially fucking overalls and some stupid looking hairdo. Yet he’s the comic relief of the game. Always there to lend a hand, or a smile, he’s guaranteed to piss you off immediately.
Lulu: Local Goth chick that is trying way too damn hard to be dark, mysterious, and a badass. She’ll frequently look down on you, say some harsh things, while wearing all black, over exposing her massive “assets”, while performing Black Magic as your Black Mage. Oh, and get used to that annoying ass personality of hers, like I said, little to no character development, IT DOESN’T FUCKING CHANGE.
Khimari: What do I need to say about this guy? He’s… there. Utterly useless, he’s quiet, and… Useless.
Rikku: Annoying, but in a… slightly less annoying way than Wakka. She’s the thief, she steals things and is also the cousin of Yuna, and also Al-Bhed, but don’t tell Wakka that, because he’s racist!
Auron: The only redeemable character in this game. He’s pretty awesome, and wields a huge blade that will seriously give you a head splitting headache. (GET IT?! I made a pun!) Sporting the only good attire in this game, Auron shops at the AWESOME STORE!
The antagonists… If you can even call them that are Jecht (annoying), Seymour (what the fuck kind of name is that?), and Yu Yevon (practically non-existent throughout the game.) and Sin (Godzilla). None of which, upon learning their back story, can be rightfully classified as a true villain. They’re all just about as useless as a four cylinder engine in a motherfucking tank.
2/10 – Because you’ve all seen these characters before, only there were in just about every anime you’ve ever seen ever. Only, those anime’s did it better, and they did it with a little something I would like to call CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!... Also, class.
Gameplay – Fucking simple. You run, you fight, you “level up” and proceed with the linear as fuck storyline.
The battle system is so simple; it made the whole game terribly fucking easy. You get to see when your opponent is about to attack, and if you have even the slightest sense of strategy, you are able to kill all of your opponents without much difficulty at all. The only way you can really lose is by being under “leveled”. You might ask why I’m putting quotation marks around the word “level” in every variation. Replacing the leveling up system is the Sphere Grid, an un-clean, un-holy, beast that shouldn’t be there, because it sucks. You use it by moving a piece on the board in a monopoly type style around attempting to collect everything on it. After a while, you can have Lulu learning Auron’s skills on his sphere grid, completely throwing the concept of classes and jobs out the fucking window.
THE AIRSHIP SYSTEM!!! FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-! The overworld is gone. And you can’t control the airship, taking 98% of exploration in the game out of the question. Shit sucked, and made me cry when I first found out. (Now every FF game is going to be doing it. BAWWW!!)
4/10 – Because I feel like being a bloody git about it. It’s way to fucking easy, and things were removed that never should have been.
Controls – Not much to say here, they’re what they should be. Most RPG’s stick to the same control setup so I’ll go ahead and give it a 10/10.
Graphics – Not much to say about that either. Being the first FF on the PS2, of course the graphics were good, in fact, one of the only redeeming qualities about the game. Yet, I’m not too much into the graphics aspects of games as much as I’m into the overall quality. 10/10
Sound – Sucked to be quite honest. The music was not anywhere near close to Noboo’s other work. The battle music sucked, the boss music sucked, hell even the victory fanfare managed to suck, as well as the Chocobo music. Many people state that “To Zanarkand” is their favorite piece, probably because it’s the only good one. In my opinion, I couldn’t stand the music, and it is the only OST of a Final Fantasy game that I don’t own, because I simply don’t care to own it. 5/10
Unique features – Umm… Umm… I have to think about that… Blitzball? That was kind of fun. I guess… The monster creation thing? That got annoying really fast… Well, shit. That’s all I got for you on that part. 2/10 (Nothing unique at all about this game.)
REPLAY VALUE?! REPLAY VALUE?! WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU WANT TO DO THAT TO YOURSELF?! Are you asking for a death wish? If I could give it a -10/10, I would, but I can’t, so enjoy the 1/10.
Recap: Story: 3/10
Characters: 2/10
Gameplay: 4/10
Controls: 10/10
Graphics: 10/10
Sound: 5/10
Unique Features: 2/10
Replay Value: 1/10 (Non-existant)
Overall Score: 2/10 By this point, it shouldn't be a surprise what-so-ever about me hating this game. There is very little that I like about it, and the little I do like isn’t anywhere near good enough to cover up the things that I hate. That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it.
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