Cousins pregnant

My heart goes out to your cousin, Sapphy...I hope she makes the right decisions.

I understand that if she was on the pill, that no other contraceptive was used. Is it the smartest thing, necessarily? No. But, does that mean she's ignorant or dumb for it? No. If someone faithfully takes oral contraceptive and it has been successful for so long, then there should be noreason why they should go on thinking that it could one day be ineffective.

I don't really want to jumo into a heated debate such as this, just trying to put in my two cents' worth :/
 
Oh she was on the pill, but came off it because it gave her spots. Im on the same one as her and Ive had some spots, but Ive been told to stick to them and not change. I will have to ask her tommorow why she didnt just change them.

Ive been on the same pill since I was 17 (apart from that 6 month break) and I was wondering if her body had become immure to that pill. But Ive been told thats no possible. She must have come off and not used a condom when she last had sex.

As for the drinking, shes determined to knock it on the head. I have faith she will be able to do it, but I think we may have to remind her in case she tries to go out for an evening. Plus weve all told her she needs to eat more cause shes eating for 2.
 
Adamant says: (6:53:30 PM)
"I am no one to judge"
Squall True Lionheart says: (6:53:31 PM)
huh??
Adamant says: (6:53:49 PM)
says judge magister zargabaath
Squall True Lionheart says: (6:54:02 PM)
0_o
 
Adamant said:
Adamant says: (6:53:30 PM)
"I am no one to judge"
Squall True Lionheart says: (6:53:31 PM)
huh??
Adamant says: (6:53:49 PM)
says judge magister zargabaath
Squall True Lionheart says: (6:54:02 PM)
0_o
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What does this have to do with the discussion, seriously?

Come on Adamant - the LAST thing I want to do here is become the first Moderator on FFF to warn a staff member :P Lay off the spam, please, or I'm really going to make a name for myself xD.
 
Aye, but it doesn't further anything, other than your own humour. I understand the joke, don't worry, but it was off-topic, which is what I'm here to prevent from happening. Don't make me be the bad bugger, please :]
 
Aztec Triogal said:
I think the problem with the drinking is not so much her drinking when the child is born as it is while she's pregnant. Neither are good... but if she drinks while the child is developing it may end up um... er... with physical and mental deficiencies...
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Alcohol is the number one cause for birth defects. A woman should have absolutely no alcohol while pregnant. Even beer is bad.

An interesting fact, many women, who are smokers, usually find smoking disgusting while pregnant. So they will quit smoking during that time. But as soon as the baby is born, they are back to smoking. I noticed this with many of my female coworkers.
 
One's body doesn't become immune to birth control, so that's not something you personally need to worry about. As for getting pregnant while on the pill, it obviously does happen. Miss a day/take it at the wrong time, might be too low-hormone of a pill, or some people are just ridiculously fertile. No pill is 100% effective but the percentage of effectiveness is up there so I could see someone getting complacent with the pill use.

A cousin of mine just had a baby, actually. She's moved around a lot, changes jobs a lot, isn't married to her boyfriend, has made some poor choices in life, etc etc etc. I do, however, believe that she's going to be a good mother. Getting pregnant doesn't magically make one 'grow up' or become more mature, but there is a degree of instinct left, plus the reality of the issue does tend to hit people pretty well. Knowing that your life now is dedicated to the life of another person does sometimes inspire people to 'clean up their act.'

Either way, I wish you and your cousin luck! This whole having babies things is exciting and it can bring families together in some situations. Hopefully you'll get to be an aunt to a really great little niece or nephew :)
 
~SapphireStar~ said:
I got a phone call from my cousin about 40 minutes ago telling me shes pregnant. Im still in shock, just hasnt sunk in. Im 22 and shes only 6 months younger then me and shes been seeing her boyfriend for almost 5 years, on and off. Plus its my grandmothers first great grandchild.
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Okay, sweetie, since she's been seeing the guy for almost 5 years and she is well over the age of an adult, it's okay. I was 19 (going on 20) the same year I got pregnant.

Now you're probably thinking so what? Arent you happy? And God yes, Im very happy for her. Yet to me shes still a baby herself, she can just about look after herself. She sees herself as mature, yet shes never lived alone (I have), changes jobs almost every month and just doesnt seem like the parenting type to me. She reckons she'll be a great parent, but shes fond of going out almost every night and getting drunk. She told me she has gone for 2 weeks without drinking and I dont think she'll manage the whole 9 months.
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Every young woman that gets pregnant always does still seem like a baby. Everybody thought the same thing about me. The thing is, is that when you get pregnant, your body changes, hormones change and feelings change. Knowing that she's carrying a life inside of her, she's probably not going to go out and drink like that, especially if she wants this child. Have some faith in her. You'd be surprised at what pregnancy can do to women.

What gets to me is she was on the same contraceptive pill as me and she was on it since she was 16. Me, I was on since I was 17, but had a 6 month break last year after I split up from my ex. She stopped taking it because it gave her spots! But I see that as a vain reason to stop taking it. And she said that your meant to change the pill brand when you get older. Ive asked my mum if this is true, and shes told me to stay on the one Im using now.
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You should really only change the pill lest complications arise. She may have just been using the fact that the pill was giving her spots as an excuse because she wanted to get pregnant. It's always hard to tell.

So she must not have used other protection, ie condoms. Which does not sound like her at all. I was just hoping that my body wont become immune to the pill Im taking. Im all over the place at the moment. Im wondering why she didnt use any protection and if she did what happened. Because we were on the same pill, thats why Im worried.
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Well, there's another bit of evidence, though condoms do not prevent pregnancy by a long shot. Your body doesn't become immune to birth control pills so you shouldn't have anything to worry about as long as you're taking them regularly and at the exact same time every single day. If she didn't use protection then she probably wanted to get pregnant, but as you being on the same pill, don't sweat it sweetie. You don't become immune to birth control pills.

You probably think Im over reacting, but I get easily worried and uspet when it comes to pregnancy and such as I had a scare once about 2 years ago.
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I can understand that you get worried and upset when it comes to pregnancy, but this is probably something your cousin wanted and if she wants it, I'm sure she's preparing herself and getting ready for it. ;) *hugs* it'll all be okay.


As for anybody else who wants to continue to be rude, sarcastic and such, I suggest it stops now because I won't hesitate to hand out warnings to anybody who is doing it. I don't care who you are. Sapphire Star came on here in need of some advice and something to selle her mind about this as I'm sure it came as a shock to her and scared her. Enough is enough. She wasn't trying to say she was more mature because she's on the pill and her cousin wasn't, blah blah blah, so I'm serious. Knock off the sarcasm and the rude remarks.
 
Thanks for the advice guys, cousins doing well.

And thanks to Lady Aerith and Angel Aerith for the pill advice. From 17 to August last year I had always taken my pill ay 8:05am on the dot. But from Feb 12th Ive been taking it from 7:58am. My mum said it doesnt matter as I had a 6 month break and I should continue to take it as 7:58am as usual.

Plus I always use a condom because no contracption is 100%, so Im double protected. And Aeris on Fire, I didnt get my cousin pregnant. Do not know where you got that idea from!

Sorry to double post guys ...

My mum just called. My cousin had a miscarriage today. She went shopping and felt ill. Went to the hospital and the doctor told her that she had lost the baby. I feel so gulity for saying those things about her being too young to have a child.

I dont understand what happened, she was fine the other day.
 
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=O ... I'm so sorry... I don't really know what to say...how's your cousin? Now would be the time to really give her support...losing her baby is a traumatic event for her...
 
Sometimes our bodies can handle it, sometimes they just can't. Your cousin may not have had the proper prenatal care right away or she may have been accessively drinking or something before she found out she was pregnant. I mean there are many different things that could have happened to cause her to miscarriage. Sometimes we are left with why it happened and we'd never know. She's definantly going to need you right now as losing a baby is traumatic for any woman. I know, I've been there. Just be there for her and let her know everything is going to be alright.
 
My girlfriends sister has recently had a miscarriage about 4 month ago and is pregnant again. Stuff like that happens all the time, if your cousin really wants a baby she will just have to try again.
 
I ha<!-- google_ad_section_start(weight=ignore) -->ve ot agree with Lady Aerith because been there too.Be on here side and help here,now you can.Keep on having save S.x aslong you dont feel ready for having a Child.

For all the others i've seen in this Thread i've to say:
No Woman is born to be a Mum.No there is no age time of how old you should be beeing a Mum or a Dad.But the moment you whant having a child you should be grown enough for the knowleeg that a baby is not a toy.Well i dont say having a baby in a age of 14 or 16.
My believes are first life your live take a good taste of it,meet the one you think(because never you know for shure)you whant to build you'r life with.Manage a House a job,try to have some money beside,because you never know,And than have a Baby.
I will not tell get married or stuff like this because i never married and i've 2 kids.

i would tell you more stuff if i could but i'm not shure if you would understand what i mean.
So keep on taste life because its wonderfull.
What basicly i'm trying to tell you i thnk you understud
 
Thanks guys. I contacted her via text message and my gran seen her today and she got it. But shes very shocked and is very pale, which is understandable. It just hasnt sunk in cause I was getting use to the idea of becoming an auntie. She even named the baby and hoped it was a boy. Im just going to be there for her now and support her in anyway I can.

I just feel confused and angry at God because why allow someone to become pregnant, give them that happiness, then snatch the baby away? I cant get my head around it. My mum keeps drilling at me that I had nothing to do with it and should just get on with my life.

To those who have ever lost a child, Im sorry and hope the grief has managed to pass for you x
 
The grief never really goes away, it's always there, but I did get blessed with my son I have now and I'm grateful for that. I still kept positive and we still kept trying and we got Logan. Don't let your cousin give up hope if she really wants a child. Be there for her, keep her in your prayers and let her know that it happens to a lot of women and that she's not alone in experiencing that kind of pain.
 
I have to agree with Lady Aerith with everything she told you.After now about 9 years losing "my first child"I'm still wondering how would it be,would he/she have my hair and stuff like that.I'll never real come over it,but my too Boys are here and than the pain seems very small.
Stay to you cousin and be on her side,she is real not along.You'll make it im shure
 
I also agree with LA the grief never goes away no matter how hard to close your heart to it there also a reminder of it you feel guilty because you think it's your fault you feel angry at god because he took your unborn child away the grief only goes away when your last breath of life has gone
 
@ Thread starter (~SapphireStar~) Sorry to hear that, of your cousin losing her baby, this is the time, when she needs your support the most.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
About the pill, if you are having any doubts or if it is giving you any trouble there is only one real way to be sure of anything: Consult a doctor, it could only help you,<o:p></o:p>
 
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