Serious Complete jerk

[SapphireStar]

I should write a book or something lol. Or you guys get jobs as agony aunts lol.

Well, I recently got in contact with my first boyfriend via FaceBook. We dated for 9 months when we were 17 and went to the same high school. I was told he fancied me in high school, yet said nothing. We had a lot in common, but he dumped me saying he wasnt ready for a serious relationship. That almost killed me cause it was my first relationship and I was devastated. We then got back together for 2 months, then he dumped me again cause he confessed he was in love with a girl from work! Another double blow. But she had fancied him, but wouldnt have him as she dated one of his friends.

I then wanted nothing to do with him, but when I moved onto my next partner, he was back on the scene saying he needed me and I cheated on my ex with him for about 3 months. He said he loved me and wanted me to leave my ex for him. But I couldnt cause what had happened. I last seen him 6 yeras ago. Then met him on FaceBook. He was asking my friends about me and how I was doing.

We started chatting again and Ive told my current boyfriend that we're talking and hes fine. I then found out that after he dumped me for the second time he got into a serious relationship with another girl and he hasnt gotten over her, even though he is now in an open relationship with a married woman! I was gutted cause he said he wasnt ready with me, but he was ready for the next one. It hurt me.

Now I can say Im over him, but the pain has come back what I felt when I was 17. Im truly in love with my current boyfriend and want to be with him for the rest of my life (he doesnt know that lol!), but Ive removed him from my contacts list as the girl he left me for has started chatting to him as if she did nothing to our old relationship! It made me so angry how she was asking what uni was like for him and at that time I was seeing him. Its like he used and lied to me and it just hurts.

I know its along time ago, but its like I was a doormat to him. I did have strong feelings for him and he dumped me twice and moved on as quick as possible. Same happened with my ex, he dumped me for another woman and I feel like shit.

 

[Erythritol]

Augh, what a douchebag. Best thing to do is just completely cut him out of your life. Just feel lucky that you found another boy whom you love and want to be with for the rest of your life. That other guy just isn't worth your time. You also shouldn't feel bad for being a "doormat" to someone. That just means you were kind, and they abused that. That makes them horrible people.

 

[SapphireStar]

Ive cut him off again. I cant have communication with him cause something always happens. I just cant believe how I felt for him and he seemed like a true gent and all that. People said he was a great guy, they dont freaking know him! m sick of it. I had people defending my last ex after he cheated on me saying he was a great person.

Its happened twice in a row and Im scared its going to happen again.

 

[Blue Link]

thas horrible. its guys like that who make me sick, playing with womens feelings like that. he is, as this threads title says, a complete jerk! in fact, I think I'll call him an asshole! good thing about this is that you found a decent guy who cares for you more than that other guy and, if anything, it made you stronger. think of getting over him as getting EXP points and you just gained a level!

 

[SapphireStar]

Yeah, I just want to know what they tell women who they get into relationships with after dumping me. They must lie to them or the women just dont care they are with someone who is cheating on their girlfriend or theyve just come right out of a relaitonship.

I mean, they dont get hung up over me, yet they do over other women. it makes me feel less important and I was just there when they needed someone. 9 months and 3 and half years is a big difference, but I gave these bastards my time and my heart and they just trash it. Bastards. On the edge of crying before work. Shit.

 

[Erythritol]

Hm, it's quite possible they do get hung up on you, and you just don't know it. Obviously, they aren't going to call you and tell you they can't get over you. It's possible that rushing into another relationship so suddenly is a way of getting over you. I've seen many people who jump right into another relationship as a way of coping with losing someone they really liked and haven't gotten over.

 

[Bambi]

He sounds like a bit of a twat, to be quite blunt. I think you did the right thing removing him from your contacts list. My daughters dad still makes my blood boil and that was over afew years go. I think some people just have that effect on us >=(

I get people defending my ex's aswel, it's really annoying. They don't know what goes on behind closed doors and that makes me so mad

 

[Moogles]

The guy sounds like a prick. Dumps you twice, then comes crawling back AGAIN. Now he's working at ruining families by swarming in on married women...

Try not to get hung up on that dude, ma'am. It looks like you're better off without him.

 

[SapphireStar]

I did tell him it doesnt say much about her, having an affiar with a student as she was his medical teacher! I know they are both adults, but its beyond wrong! He defended her saying he didnt want me talking about her like that, I called her a tramp and all that. But its ridic. I cant believe he could do something like that. Its just sex though, they arent dating.

Im upset that hes gone that way, but its his fault if something happens and to be honest I want them to get caught.

Im in a better relationship and I always make sure I have enough time to sort my head out before I jump into another relationship. It was 6 months after my last ex dumped me before I got into another one. He dived straight in.

 

[Donald Trump]

People make mistakes and do stupid things.
and you are in a much better relationship, you said so yourself, so you realise that. Hopefully you can move on and forget 'bout him.
guys can be total assholes, i know because i am one (a guy that is) but you obviously can cope with that unlike another certain member who may or may not express misogynist views.

but try to let go of the hate/negative emotion you feel towards him, as hate is ugly, you know? and it wont do you any good constantly hating him, as im sure there would have been good times and its much nicer to remember them

 

[Korytco]

I should write a book or something lol. Or you guys get jobs as agony aunts lol.

Well, I recently got in contact with my first boyfriend via FaceBook. We dated for 9 months when we were 17 and went to the same high school. I was told he fancied me in high school, yet said nothing. We had a lot in common, but he dumped me saying he wasnt ready for a serious relationship. That almost killed me cause it was my first relationship and I was devastated. We then got back together for 2 months, then he dumped me again cause he confessed he was in love with a girl from work! Another double blow. But she had fancied him, but wouldnt have him as she dated one of his friends.

He was immature , and did not know what love was yet. He had illusions of the idea, lied to himself and others. Hurt those that truly did love without understanding or caring about the effects of those truly loving. He was experimenting in life and looking for better results. You are not the person he was looking for , trial and error, young people who date do that....

He sounds immature, sexual and as if he does not believe in love. At least not in the way that you do or want him to, that is not likely to change, but who knows.

I then wanted nothing to do with him, but when I moved onto my next partner, he was back on the scene saying he needed me and I cheated on my ex with him for about 3 months. He said he loved me and wanted me to leave my ex for him. But I couldnt cause what had happened. I last seen him 6 yeras ago. Then met him on FaceBook. He was asking my friends about me and how I was doing.

Im confused here cheating on your X as you moved on ? When you wanted nothing to do with him? How is that cheating?

We started chatting again and Ive told my current boyfriend that we're talking and hes fine. I then found out that after he dumped me for the second time he got into a serious relationship with another girl and he hasnt gotten over her, even though he is now in an open relationship with a married woman! I was gutted cause he said he wasnt ready with me, but he was ready for the next one. It hurt me.

If he has not got over her maybe she is really what he was looking for in a woman and you were not. As for the married woman that would be considered experimenting some more. I would consider it immoral , and just wrong. Not responsible and considerate of those that love her , its just not right and people can not see this anymore.
Now I can say Im over him, but the pain has come back what I felt when I was 17. Im truly in love with my current boyfriend and want to be with him for the rest of my life
Perhaps your ex feels the same way about this girl, if so it works out nicely. I can not see you being happy with someone that did not think you were right for him anyways...Or maybe she is more easily played and has lower standards as to what a serious relationship is. I do no think you seriously wanted to be committed to a man who sleeps with a married woman....can you say DIVORCE ? It is best that he left you, and you would have been BETTER off if you had left him.
(he doesnt know that lol!), but Ive removed him from my contacts list as the girl he left me for has started chatting to him as if she did nothing to our old relationship! It made me so angry how she was asking what uni was like for him and at that time I was seeing him. Its like he used and lied to me and it just hurts.
He gave in to you irresponsibly, you should have not been together in the first place. It sounds like to me, at least. That you and him are not meant to be, obviously. Perhaps his latest GF is meant to be with him, the search is over. Or maybe the new target will learn as much from him as you did . Eventually his sins will bite him in the ass.

I would say used , but I think he was pretty honest in how he felt, he told you he wasn't ready for a serious relationship and he left you. He is with someone now, and you claim they are serious, perhaps that is the truth . He did not lie before. (based on what I have read so far)
He searched around , slept around and maybe found love...Or maybe he just found someone else that he thinks he loves.

He left you to experiment more. When you experiment more, you are looking for different or better results. Typically...better and different is opinionated, in his opinion it could mean lower expectations and more easy.

I know its along time ago, but its like I was a doormat to him. I did have strong feelings for him and he dumped me twice and moved on as quick as possible. Same happened with my ex, he dumped me for another woman and I feel like shit.

These guys are losers, you seem to want to get serious too quickly, just an opinion.

When he leaves his new gf is he does , I bet you could get some closure but talking with her on MSN or something , Im sure you both will be able to relate. The more you share with people that know the truth, the more the truth spreads. Or attempts to, if he never leaves here you know that he did not lie about you 2 not being right for each other. He is a jerk aways, and much worse.