By "supermarket" I mean any large food grocery, such as Aldi's, Safeway, Giant, Kroegers, etc. Anyways, here's some "secret" facts about the grocery business that the vast majority of people seem to be oblivious to:
1. Grocery stores sell food. Not vacuum cleaners, not coffee grinders, not automatic transmissions. So please don't ask for them, and please don't complain to the manager when the poor sap you grinded about this earlier has to tell you "no".
2. Stop signs are serious business. Let me take a moment to explain what "stop" is. It is not slowing down to 10 miles an hour and blasting your horn at anything that doesn't get out of your way. It is not hitting the gas with the hope that you can "outrun" the pedestrians trying to cross the street. It is MAKING YOUR CAR STOP MOVING BEFORE YOU CROSS THAT STOP SIGN. "Not moving" does not mean taking your foot of the gas pedal and looking both ways. It means your speedometer actually has to read "0" before you start moving again. Regardless of the amount of police near the store, you can be sure as hell that the parking lots are being video taped and any collision you get in with in a pedestrian WILL be your fault in court.
3. Carts have the right of way, period. Believe me, courtesy clerks hate having to push in a dozen carts at a time a lot more than you hate having to wait for them. But you need to remember that unlike your car, a massive stack of carts do not have "power steering" or "brakes". Those carts aren't going to stop moving even if you suddenly appear in front of them. If you're still not convinced that trying to sideswipe a cart-pusher is a bad idea, just remember that no matter how tough you thing your vehicle is, a couple hundred pounds of sharp metal slamming into it will at least leave it with a nasty paint job if not total it entirely.
4. Employees do not spend days at training sessions learning the locations of every item in the store. The "official" training given by managers for most basic jobs are done in two or three days- most of the knowledge to actually do the job is passed down from older employees. Plus, very little of the checkers and courtesy clerks time is actually spent going through the isles, so it's unlikely that any one person will have a complete knowledge of all products moving in and out of the shelves. While you can trust them to have a general idea of most of the items in the store, don't be devastated when they can't tell you the location of those octopus tentacles you were thinking of buying for your crazy Aunt Esmeralda.
5. Courtesy clerks have to help EVERYONE, not just you. The main way managers know if employees are doing their job are through "secret shoppers", undercover shoppers that act like normal customers until they leave the store, where they write down an extremely detailed report of everything that went right and wrong in there entire visit. Often these reports are very tough and can have a huge impact on promotion or raise opportunities. If a courtesy clerk blows off a secret shopper (unintentionally, of course) just to help you, then they could be out of a job within a month regardless of how much good service you got in the situation.
6. YOUR CART ISN'T GOING TO BE BAGGED IF YOU DON'T MOVE IT DOWN THE REGISTER. At least 80% of the people I have seen in a register with a second person bagging cling to their carts like it's a long lost son even though all of their items are on the belt. If you don't push the cart next to the bagger, how are they supposed to put your items back in the cart? Then of course, people get annoyed when they discover that they have to put the bags in themselves because they didn't give a bagger a chance to do it in the first place.
7. Different types of carts are not interchangeable. Even slight differences like a cupholder on one cart can lead to massive jams and lockups when collecting large groups of them later on. Most stores all have only one type of cart, but if you notice that the one you have is different from any other cart in the cart corral, do NOT just slam your cart as hard as you can into the one closest to you. Leave it unattached to any other cart- it counts as a "good deed for the day" if you follow this rule!
Bonus Ultra Secret Tip: Do not steal carts from one store and leave them in the corral of another store half a mile away! You should not be visiting grocery stores in the first place if you feel the need to do this!
Super Bonus Ultra Secret Tip: If you DO happen to try to steal a cart, don't be surprised if one of the wheels locks up.
Final Platinum Alpha Tip: The wheel locking device can be circumvented by slightly tipping the cart sideways onto the side without the wheel lock while pushing.
I would write even more but I'm too irritated just thinking about this to continue. If you happen to work at a grocery store feel free to contribute any similar experiences.
1. Grocery stores sell food. Not vacuum cleaners, not coffee grinders, not automatic transmissions. So please don't ask for them, and please don't complain to the manager when the poor sap you grinded about this earlier has to tell you "no".
2. Stop signs are serious business. Let me take a moment to explain what "stop" is. It is not slowing down to 10 miles an hour and blasting your horn at anything that doesn't get out of your way. It is not hitting the gas with the hope that you can "outrun" the pedestrians trying to cross the street. It is MAKING YOUR CAR STOP MOVING BEFORE YOU CROSS THAT STOP SIGN. "Not moving" does not mean taking your foot of the gas pedal and looking both ways. It means your speedometer actually has to read "0" before you start moving again. Regardless of the amount of police near the store, you can be sure as hell that the parking lots are being video taped and any collision you get in with in a pedestrian WILL be your fault in court.
3. Carts have the right of way, period. Believe me, courtesy clerks hate having to push in a dozen carts at a time a lot more than you hate having to wait for them. But you need to remember that unlike your car, a massive stack of carts do not have "power steering" or "brakes". Those carts aren't going to stop moving even if you suddenly appear in front of them. If you're still not convinced that trying to sideswipe a cart-pusher is a bad idea, just remember that no matter how tough you thing your vehicle is, a couple hundred pounds of sharp metal slamming into it will at least leave it with a nasty paint job if not total it entirely.
4. Employees do not spend days at training sessions learning the locations of every item in the store. The "official" training given by managers for most basic jobs are done in two or three days- most of the knowledge to actually do the job is passed down from older employees. Plus, very little of the checkers and courtesy clerks time is actually spent going through the isles, so it's unlikely that any one person will have a complete knowledge of all products moving in and out of the shelves. While you can trust them to have a general idea of most of the items in the store, don't be devastated when they can't tell you the location of those octopus tentacles you were thinking of buying for your crazy Aunt Esmeralda.
5. Courtesy clerks have to help EVERYONE, not just you. The main way managers know if employees are doing their job are through "secret shoppers", undercover shoppers that act like normal customers until they leave the store, where they write down an extremely detailed report of everything that went right and wrong in there entire visit. Often these reports are very tough and can have a huge impact on promotion or raise opportunities. If a courtesy clerk blows off a secret shopper (unintentionally, of course) just to help you, then they could be out of a job within a month regardless of how much good service you got in the situation.
6. YOUR CART ISN'T GOING TO BE BAGGED IF YOU DON'T MOVE IT DOWN THE REGISTER. At least 80% of the people I have seen in a register with a second person bagging cling to their carts like it's a long lost son even though all of their items are on the belt. If you don't push the cart next to the bagger, how are they supposed to put your items back in the cart? Then of course, people get annoyed when they discover that they have to put the bags in themselves because they didn't give a bagger a chance to do it in the first place.
7. Different types of carts are not interchangeable. Even slight differences like a cupholder on one cart can lead to massive jams and lockups when collecting large groups of them later on. Most stores all have only one type of cart, but if you notice that the one you have is different from any other cart in the cart corral, do NOT just slam your cart as hard as you can into the one closest to you. Leave it unattached to any other cart- it counts as a "good deed for the day" if you follow this rule!
Bonus Ultra Secret Tip: Do not steal carts from one store and leave them in the corral of another store half a mile away! You should not be visiting grocery stores in the first place if you feel the need to do this!
Super Bonus Ultra Secret Tip: If you DO happen to try to steal a cart, don't be surprised if one of the wheels locks up.
Final Platinum Alpha Tip: The wheel locking device can be circumvented by slightly tipping the cart sideways onto the side without the wheel lock while pushing.
I would write even more but I'm too irritated just thinking about this to continue. If you happen to work at a grocery store feel free to contribute any similar experiences.
