mizushinzui
Auron's Apprentice
Hi everyone =] Just thought I'd post one of my stories here to see what people thought about it. Any constructive critisismn will be welcomed (please not I have terrable spelling so if there are any error just let me know and I'll correct them. Also sorry for the format as they are all done using double spacing)
Also here is my site where you can find all my stories and e-mail me your comments.
Chapter 1: A long Night
Arkiel ducked, narrowly missing a blow to the head from a metal pipe. He heard a 'clang' as the metal pipe hit the floor. The creatures acidic skin had finally eaten through the metal and it started searching the area for a new weapon. Arkiel used the distraction to jump from his cover and bring his claw slashing down. The creature screamed in pain and anguish as the other-worldly metal seared through it's skin. It collapsed into a black, soggy heap on the ground and Arkiel tapped it with his boot to make sure it was dead. Satisfied he turned and was about to leave when he heard his boots start to hiss violently. Holes had began to wear their way through the material as the acid whent to work.
"sh**" he said, as his phone started ringing. He saw the name on the screen and jabbed the button angrily.
"Don? Why didn't you tell me they were still acidic when they were dead?" He shouted into the reciever.
"Oh" Came the suprised voice on the other end "I didn't know that"
"Bullsh**!"
"So, I can assume the things dead then?"
Arkiel pulled his coat tighter around him as he stepped out of the alley.
"Yeah, it's dead" He confirmed. He walked down the street, looking through dark shop windows. He had to admit that London was his least favourite place in the world, too overcrowded. Too many people. He glanced at his watch witch flashed the time, 3:00 am.
"You need pick-up?" Don said from the other end of the phone
"Nah, I think im going to take a walk"
"You sure Ark? The forcast says it's going to rain tonight"
Arkiel looked at the sky, it was heavy with dark sullen clowds, full to bursting with rain.
"I think I'll manage" Ark replied as the first tell tale drops began falling from the sky.
He hung up and ran across the street as the rain began to poor heavily from the sky. He walked past a door displaying 'XXX' and 'LIVE NUDES' all over the front of it. A women standing in front of a desk said "hey, looking for some company?" Arkiel waved his hand at her and she fell to the floor. Dead, for now. "I fu***** hate people" He said as he looked at his clawes and they seemed to melt, turning back into human hands for the first time all night.
Eventually he made his way down into a tube station. There was a smell coming from one of the guards. Arkiel recognised the smell, he had smelt it every day of his 'life'. It was the smell, of death. It lingered around a security officer who was standing guard at the entrance to the subway. "what's going on here?" Ark said to himself, under his breath. All that was clear was that this man was going to die, and soon too judging by how strong the smell was getting. Ark looked at the stairs that he had just come down and saw a man coming down with his hand wedged firmly inside his coat. Ark frowned, the man was looking at the timetables but he kept glancing over his shoulder at the guard. Ark looked around himself, there was noone else in the station. Odd, even if it was 3am. He looked over and saw the guard go towards the shifty man. 'Crap! It's happening now' He thought, turning his hand back into a claw again 'I can't get a little break'. Ark looked up again just in time to see the man turn and whip a gun out of his coat. The startled guard didn't even have time to draw his weapon as the bullet peirced his skull. Ark saw the shifty man take off down towards the platform and ran after him, nimbly hoping the security gate and sliding down the escalator. The man jumped as Ark landed infront of him at the bottem and waved his gun in Ark's face, trying to treaten him.
"You'd better move or I'll shoot. You saw me! I'll do it again" Ark laughed quitely and stepped forward, as he did so the man fired the entire magazine into him. Ark staggered backwards looked down and saw the bullet holes. He looked back up and cracked his neck.Raising a claw he said "My turn" and plunged the claw strait towards the man. Instead of tearing skin and rending flesh as it would havenormally done, the claw reached down into the depths of the man's soul tearing the very life that he held so dear strait out of him. Ark withdrew his claw and it held a small ball of light, he looked into the eyes of the fear stricken man and saw them darken. The life drained from him the man just keeled over. Ark ran back up the escalators to the dead gaurd and placed the ball of light on his chest. It melted into the man and spread from the top of his head to the tips of his toes. Eventually the light died down and the blood dissapeared, the colour came back to the man and his eyes lost their glazed look, then finally the bullet hole dissapeared and was replaced with a small black mark, on the man's forehead. Arkeil left, before more people arrived, or before the man gained enouph energy to ask questions. He stepped out onto the dark London streets and pulled a box of cigarettes from his pockets. He stuck one in his mouth and lit it, the rain made the job twice as hard. He took a deep drag from it and exhaled, he had been wanting that for a while. He suddenly heard screaming off to his left, and sighed.
It was going to be a long night...
Also here is my site where you can find all my stories and e-mail me your comments.
Chapter 1: A long Night
Arkiel ducked, narrowly missing a blow to the head from a metal pipe. He heard a 'clang' as the metal pipe hit the floor. The creatures acidic skin had finally eaten through the metal and it started searching the area for a new weapon. Arkiel used the distraction to jump from his cover and bring his claw slashing down. The creature screamed in pain and anguish as the other-worldly metal seared through it's skin. It collapsed into a black, soggy heap on the ground and Arkiel tapped it with his boot to make sure it was dead. Satisfied he turned and was about to leave when he heard his boots start to hiss violently. Holes had began to wear their way through the material as the acid whent to work.
"sh**" he said, as his phone started ringing. He saw the name on the screen and jabbed the button angrily.
"Don? Why didn't you tell me they were still acidic when they were dead?" He shouted into the reciever.
"Oh" Came the suprised voice on the other end "I didn't know that"
"Bullsh**!"
"So, I can assume the things dead then?"
Arkiel pulled his coat tighter around him as he stepped out of the alley.
"Yeah, it's dead" He confirmed. He walked down the street, looking through dark shop windows. He had to admit that London was his least favourite place in the world, too overcrowded. Too many people. He glanced at his watch witch flashed the time, 3:00 am.
"You need pick-up?" Don said from the other end of the phone
"Nah, I think im going to take a walk"
"You sure Ark? The forcast says it's going to rain tonight"
Arkiel looked at the sky, it was heavy with dark sullen clowds, full to bursting with rain.
"I think I'll manage" Ark replied as the first tell tale drops began falling from the sky.
He hung up and ran across the street as the rain began to poor heavily from the sky. He walked past a door displaying 'XXX' and 'LIVE NUDES' all over the front of it. A women standing in front of a desk said "hey, looking for some company?" Arkiel waved his hand at her and she fell to the floor. Dead, for now. "I fu***** hate people" He said as he looked at his clawes and they seemed to melt, turning back into human hands for the first time all night.
Eventually he made his way down into a tube station. There was a smell coming from one of the guards. Arkiel recognised the smell, he had smelt it every day of his 'life'. It was the smell, of death. It lingered around a security officer who was standing guard at the entrance to the subway. "what's going on here?" Ark said to himself, under his breath. All that was clear was that this man was going to die, and soon too judging by how strong the smell was getting. Ark looked at the stairs that he had just come down and saw a man coming down with his hand wedged firmly inside his coat. Ark frowned, the man was looking at the timetables but he kept glancing over his shoulder at the guard. Ark looked around himself, there was noone else in the station. Odd, even if it was 3am. He looked over and saw the guard go towards the shifty man. 'Crap! It's happening now' He thought, turning his hand back into a claw again 'I can't get a little break'. Ark looked up again just in time to see the man turn and whip a gun out of his coat. The startled guard didn't even have time to draw his weapon as the bullet peirced his skull. Ark saw the shifty man take off down towards the platform and ran after him, nimbly hoping the security gate and sliding down the escalator. The man jumped as Ark landed infront of him at the bottem and waved his gun in Ark's face, trying to treaten him.
"You'd better move or I'll shoot. You saw me! I'll do it again" Ark laughed quitely and stepped forward, as he did so the man fired the entire magazine into him. Ark staggered backwards looked down and saw the bullet holes. He looked back up and cracked his neck.Raising a claw he said "My turn" and plunged the claw strait towards the man. Instead of tearing skin and rending flesh as it would havenormally done, the claw reached down into the depths of the man's soul tearing the very life that he held so dear strait out of him. Ark withdrew his claw and it held a small ball of light, he looked into the eyes of the fear stricken man and saw them darken. The life drained from him the man just keeled over. Ark ran back up the escalators to the dead gaurd and placed the ball of light on his chest. It melted into the man and spread from the top of his head to the tips of his toes. Eventually the light died down and the blood dissapeared, the colour came back to the man and his eyes lost their glazed look, then finally the bullet hole dissapeared and was replaced with a small black mark, on the man's forehead. Arkeil left, before more people arrived, or before the man gained enouph energy to ask questions. He stepped out onto the dark London streets and pulled a box of cigarettes from his pockets. He stuck one in his mouth and lit it, the rain made the job twice as hard. He took a deep drag from it and exhaled, he had been wanting that for a while. He suddenly heard screaming off to his left, and sighed.
It was going to be a long night...
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