Quotes Thread

Scrutator

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Easy enough to understand, post favorite quotes from movies/TV shows. Limit anything from Advent Children please if you don't mind.

Anyhoo some Deadwood to start off with:

E.B. Farnum: Separate rooms, I'll arrange that by tomorrow, but today I can't fix it, unless you kill a guest.
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Al Swearengen: God rest the souls of that poor family... and pussy's half price for the next 15 minutes.
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Al Swearengen: You want a blow job while I talk to you?

Judge: No.

Al Swearengen: I wasn't offering personally.
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E.B. Farnum: Hickok's half-women friend's off somewheres on a tear. The orphan square head's in the widow's care. The widow feels put upon. She's asked me to find her some help. I suggested the gimp.
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Al Swearengen: Wave a penny under the Jew's nose; if they got living breath in them, brings them right around.
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Reverend H.W. Smith: When I read the Scriptures, I do not feel Christ's love as I used to.

Calamity Jane: Aw, is that so? That is too bad! Join the fuckin' club of most of us!
 
Wellllllll~ here are some of my favorites. I believe I may be immature %D xD

The Simpsons

Homer: No man should outlive his fictional wizard
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Homer: I'll own a basket ball team and a football team, and I'll make them play baseball.
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Homer: *looks up at the stars* I wish God were alive to see this.
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Futurama

Leela: You can't just sit here in the dark and listen to classical music.
Fry: I could have if you hadn't turned on the lights and shut off the music.
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The Colbert Report

The pen is mightier than the sword. If you shoot that pen out of a gun. - Stephen
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Here's mine:

Enter the Dragon

*After watching a martial artist hurl a board into the air and kick it away*
Bruce Lee: "Boards don't hit back"
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A Clockwork Orange

Alex: Ho ho ho...well, if it isn't stinking Billygoat Billyboy in poison. How are thou, thou globby bottle of cheap stinking chip oil? Come and get one in the yarbles, if ya have any yarbles ya eunich jelly belt.
 
Cruel Intentions

"everybody loves me and i intend to keep it that way"
"your just a toy - a little toy i like to play with"

Futurama

Bender "well im rich - goodbye losers - whom ive always hated"
The Professer - "Im BORED! lets go"

Ill think of more later ^_^
 
Family Guy

Brian: Swing and a miss (Trust me, it's funny went you see it)

Futurama

Bender: Every man for himself! Save me Leela!
 
XD just thought of another genious Futurama quote :

Professer "who are those little orange men?"
Slug-willy-wonka "why there the grunka Lunkas!"
Professer "Tell them i hate them!"

Leela "Look - the Near-death star!"

That one makes sense if youve seen the episode ^_^
 
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For future postings can people try not post up quotes that you'll only get if you've seen the show, not fair for others. Thanks in advance.

FatBot: I heard that in one single night you drank a whole keg, streaked across campus and cramped 15 humans into a phonebooth.

Bender: Well well most of them were children.
 
Chungking Express:
"Excuse me Miss, do you like pineapple?" (a character's chat-up line to a a woman in a bar)

Annie Hall:
"A relationship is like a shark, it has to constantly move forwards or it dies. And I think what we have on our hands is a dead shark"

"We used to have a saying - those who can't do, teach. And those who can't teach, teach gym"

Ghostbusters:
"Yes it's true...this guy has no dick"
 
Family Guy:

Peter: "I provide for my family cuz it's my duty. Hehehehe...duty.....hehehehe...diarrhea.....hey Lois!"
Lois: "What?"
Peter "Diarrhea!"

Simpsons:

Homer: "Ohhh! Half my pay goes to Bart, half goes to my Vegas wife! What's left for Moe?"
 
I could go on for hours with Futurama, Simpsons and Family Guy quotes, but here's some of the better ones;

Bender: "I hate the people who love me and they hate me"

Homer: "I'm not some sort of super-genius. Or are I?"

Death from Family Guy: "Oh, when the lightning struck, you soiled yourself. Enjoy"

But my personal favourite is from Scarface;
Tony Montana: "Say hello to my lil' friend"
 
Dane Cook: "I hate it when people shout at the drive-thru box. I'm like 'Hi sir welcome to burger King, can I take your order?' 'WHOPPER!!!' 'Sir...' 'WHOPPER NO ONION!!!'"
 
Napoleon : Do the chickens have large talons?
lol n pretty much nefing els from dat movie. its soooo funni
 
Here are some from the movie 300 :cool::

Spartan King Leonidas
: Spartans! Enjoy your breakfast, for tonight we dine in Hell!
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Spartan King Leonidas: We Spartans have descended from Hercules himself. Taught never to retreat, never to surrender. Taught that death in the battlefield is the greatest glory he could achieve in his life. Spartans: the finest soldiers the world has ever known.
---
Spartan King Leonidas:
"You threaten my people with slavery and death."
Persian Emissary:
"This is madness!"
Spartan King Leonidas:
"Madness? THIS IS SPARTAAAAA!!"
 
My favorites that I can remember.

"We can have in life but one great experience at best, and the secret of life is to reproduce that experience as often as possible."
-Oscar Wilde

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"If I don't do it, I'll overflow."
"What do you mean? What'll happen?"
"Probably...something amazing"
-FLCL
 
Some Hot Fuzz fried gold.

Danny Butterman: "Is it true that there's a point on a man's head where if you shoot it, it will blow up?"
 
From School For Scoundrels:

"Did Lesher rape you too?!"
"WHA-?! No, I just don't like him."
"uhhhh....yeah...me too....I...uh...just don't like him."

From Blades of Glory:

"Get out of my face"
"I'll get inside your face"*headbutt*

"No one knows what it means, but it's provocative"

"This guy's like a brother to me. And this, this is his girlfriend, WHO IS NOT A SLUT!"
 
Hot Fuzz:

DS Andy Wainwright: You do know there are more guns in the country than there are in the city.
Ds Andy Cartwright: Everyone and their mums is packin' round here!
Nicholas Angel: Like who?
Andy Wainwright: Farmers.
Nicholas Angel: Who else?
Ds Andy Cartwright: Farmers' mums.
 
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