Cloud in the Golden Saucer

December 4, 2006, 4:49 PM

Wll this is my first ever Fanfic, it didnt take much time, and it isint complete either, and i need serious comments, please, I want to improve....
And some parts might not be very accurate since I dont remember the story exactly....

Cloud in the Gold saucer

Cloud sprinted to the monorail and slipped through the sliding doors moments before it leaves North Corel. Vincent and Tifa were already in there, waiting for him to join them to the Golden Saucer. The insides of the Monorail was thick with the smell of Lavender, as the lady who just came out was spraying that everywhere.

"Where were you?" Asked Tifa. " I was worried sick!"
Cloud seemed confident and Explained, "I was just talking to a strange little man, he seemed to know something about the whereabouts ofSephiroth."
"Ahhh, I thought we came here to forget about our problems and have fun!" Vincent reminded Cloud, brushing his hair away from his eyes.
"Finding Sephiroth is our first priority, lets find him and then we can have time for fun. I'm doing this for you guys."
"Oh come on, dont be like that, it wont kill us to go to the Gold Saucer, anyways, you promised me you will take me there ever since that night inNilbelhiem!"
"Fine then, but then we focus our target on Sephiroth"

Everyone was silent as they all looked down on the ugly Mako reactor they were floating above. A deformed bird flew from the reactor and landed on the monorail. It started to peck on the polished metal, it continued for a few minutes before Vincent took out his new Cerberus and shot it down, forming a hole in the ceiling. Knowing he had to pay for it, he left a few hundred Gil on the floor beside him.

"When are we every going to be there?" Moaned Tifa, staring at Cloud with a sweet smile.
"I don't know"
"Do you even care about me?"

Tifa was fuming mad at Cloud, Cloud just stood there, as silent and calm as before. He looked at the gigantic building ahead and looked at his watch.

After a minute of silence, Cloud replied,"it will only take five more minutes."
"Finally..." Sighed Tifa.

Vincent looked at Cloud with a suspicious look, Cloud just ignored his snare.
The monorail approached the huge golden building slowly, they could hear the joyful music and Tifa kept gasping at the scenery.
A nerdy voice came out of the top right microphone, informing the passengers not to get out of the monorail until it comes to a complete stop.
Vincent just jumped out of the window, injuring himself in the process. The monorail came to a complete stop a few seconds later, Cloud andTifa hurried out to check on Vincent.
He layed there, motionless, like a block of wood. Vincent's real arm was badly bruised, leaving a brown mark there. Cloud picked him up and Tifa started shouting to him about not doing that again.

"Why the hell did you do that?!?" Tifa screamed angrily.
"I th-thought it w-was safe to j-j-jump out of the w-window."
"Don't do it again, please, we don't want to lose you!"
"A train fall wont kill me!"
"Well if you fell down and a dragon ate you, you would die..."
"Ill just kill it with my gun."
"What if it was very strong?"
"Ill turn into Chaos"
"What if you couldn't?"
"Ill Just....."
"SHUT UP, both of you!"

Cloud walked quietly to the skinny man standing at the ticket counter.

"Ticket for one, please."
"Here you are, enjoy the Golden Saucer!"
"Hey! What about us?" Screamed Tifa.
"Pay for yourselves, that's what you get for arguing"

Cloud walked into the circular room, and hid behind the wall.

"So stubborn!" Sighed Tifa.
"I got some Gil on me."
"where did you get it from?"
"Sold my old gun for fifty grand!"
"Well, at least we can get in."

Vincent and Tifa walked up to the Ticket Vendor and bought two one time pass tickets. They both hurriedly ran to check on Cloud, he was standing at the side of the circular room, staring at the floor. He heard Vincent's metallic footsteps and instantly looked up to see them both.

"Whats wrong with you, Cloud?" Tifa asked.
"Nothing, can we please continue?
"NO! Not until you tell me what's wrong!"
"It's just that.... we've been after Sephiroth and now we just decide to stop!"
"You can't be serious all the time, you know!"

Cloud stayed silent for a very long time and headed towards the Chocobo hole, Tifa and Vincent jumped in after him. The slide was very long, full of turns and twists, but after a minute, they ended up on the top of the Golden Saucer. Cloud sprinted towards the door, it slid open before him, allowing him in. They all walked at anequal pace to the Rider's entrance. A weird woman greeted them all.

"Welcome to the Chocobo Races, your name please?"
"Cloud."
"TIFA!"
"And you sir?"
"No need for you to know."
"Fine then..."
"We got two places available, who shall be riding?"
"Me." Cloud said with complete confidence.
"I wanna ride too!" screamed Tifa.
"OK then, were full! Good luck to both of you."

The weird woman showed Cloud and Tifa the way to the stables, Cloud took Fluffy the black chocobo while Tifa chose Tweety, the green Chocobo. The race was about to start, Cloud got onto his chocobo and rushed to the starting line. Tifa was still putting on her boots and feeding the chocobo, the countdown started and Tifa got on her chocobo and it hopped to the starting line. Instantly, the race started.

Clous got a tiny head start over all the chocobos, rushing into first place, on the other hand, Tifa started over three seconds late, mainly because the chocobo was still chewing the food. Tweety then sped off at max speed, beating fifth and fourth places easily, as they had puny average yellow chocobos. Fluffy was still sprinting at full speed, widening the gap between him and his opponents. Cloud's chocobo became exhausted then, and couldn't run at all!

Tweety beat the fourth place and hit another chocobo, injuring both. Tifa gave the chocobo an X-potion, but it took some time for the wound to heal, by that time, she was last again, but with a small gap in between her and the fifth.Tweety had max stamina so he sprinted at max speed, gaining speed as she went down the slopes. The wind was blowing past her like a rocket, not knowing that she was second, she saw Cloud, riding Fluffy, who was extremely exhausted from all the running, but he still finished first withTifa moments after him!

Since Cloud was first, and he broke the Gold Saucer record for fastest chocobo race ever, by no more than a few milliseconds, the Gold Saucer gave him the Gold Medal, it was golden and shiny, covered with tiny particles of diamond to give it extra shine. He alsoreceived a lifetime ticket to the Golden Saucer. Tifa with second place, got an ether only, she wasn't jealous though, she was extremely happy for Cloud.

December 23, 2006, 4:37 PM

in some areas, vincent is just not vincent

December 23, 2006, 4:49 PM

lol, I know it isint good, but whatever!
It's my first, probably my last, I was just trying Fanfics...