[Birthweek 2017] Moogle Murder Mystery - Game Thread.

Dr.Fistbeard examines the alien egg
 
The message was intriguing. Coive was still munching through the Gyshal Greens with evident fervour; wow, spectacular creatures chocobos! He pushed a few more leaves in his direction and climbed out of the trough in a most adorable fashion. A rather rotund, creamy chocobo was sitting beside the feeding trough. It seemed that the chocobo had been sitting there for some time almost part of the furniture, enjoying the easy access to the succulent greens.

Dirk looked at the magnificent bird with his yellow eyes. From his mind to the chocobo's he projected his question:
"Would you perchance know what the poor unfortunate dead moogle may have been compiling at report on, before being so tragically interrupted?"
 
Vivian is absolute filth, but she feels prettier than ever with this head & shoulders covering her! The scent of apple is the best of the best of shampoo scents, as anyone with an ounce of fashion sense knows, so she's ecstatic! The malboro is starting to look much more...gentlemanly than he ever did before too. She decides to leave the room before this goes any further.

Vivian remembers some odd, frog-eating pin cushion that was wandering around before. "Where would I be if I were a pin cushion? Ah, the toilet!". Vivian goes to the toilet (room :lew:).

Vivian looks under the stall doors and sees that the weird being is in the middle stall. She knocks on the door. "Excuse me sir/madam/eating machine, may I have a word with one? I promise I won't bite! Hard!".

Vivan awaits a response while licking some of the head & shoulders out of her hair :griin:.
 
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Round 19:

Maps:
Click the maps to enlarge. For the clearest image open in a new tab.

Ground Floor:

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First Floor:

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Entertainment Suite:

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***

Particulars:

Sam interviews the Kraken.

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The Kraken has the following to say:

Oh ho ho ho ho!!! Freedom! Thank you, strange bird.
I promised I would tell you who I saw in here... I do believe I saw a suspicious herring not so long ago... Oh ho ho ho! It was the
irritating kid who placed the sack in the bin that you found earlier... Oh ho ho ho!!! I saw it all from this tank and people assumed I was just silly, slimy sea life!
I AM LORD KRAKEN AND I AM UNLEASHED!!! OH HO HO HO!!!!!

Sam's moogle doll grabs an assortment of candy... But he neglects to use the candy scoop and makes quite a bit of mess.

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Item obtained: heap of assorted candy.


-

Maybot questions Nutalie Selz about Pomson and Kuporius, and her relationship with them.

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Nutalie has the following to say:

STOP MESSING UP MY SWEETS, KUPO! THAT £$!% ROBOT!!!
Excuse me, ma'am. Not you, kupo!
What? Pomas Pomson... is dead, kupo?! Aw, nuts! Well life is cruel for sure. The poor guy had the hots for me, kupo. He kept writing silly poems for me all because our pom-poms tangled once and we were stuck together for days, kupo!!! Pomas saw it as a sign that we were meant to be married, but Kuporius thought Pomas was an idiot, kupo...
What began as a minor disagreement between them grew into bitter hatred, kupo... I wasn't in the mood for a relationship, kupo, but I do regret leading Pomson on like I did! I was just having a bit of harmless fun, kupo! How was I supposed to know it would cause distress, kupo?!

-

Dr. Fistbeard examines the alien egg...

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Uh-oh! The alien egg is opening up, making a disgusting squelching noise as the slime within rearranges itself...


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An alien facehugger has attached itself to Dr. Fistbeard's face! Dr. Fistbeard can still move and take turns, but the facehugger will be hugging his face and will likely cause some serious distress in the future...

-

Dirk ♥ talks to the Fat Chocobo with the face of Shace.

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The Fat Chocobo can barely wark as well as walk, but Dirk ♥ extracts and translates these thoughts from the immobile blob through telepathic means:

Oooooh! A giant, walking gysahl green! Yum! Come on, then! Hop in my mouth! I don't think I am strong enough to lean forward anymore! Oh! Report?! Papers! I ate some of them too! It tasted like the kind moogle was looking after us chocobos, among many things! He thought we didn't have enough space to move around, but to be honest I've forgotten how to move anyway! Please hop in my mouth! I'M HUNGRY!!!

-

Vivian attempts to knock on the toilet stall which Quina is occupying... However, since Vivian is poisoned and confused while she thinks she is politely knocking, she instead slides underneath the stall and rudely interrupts Quina instead!

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Quina has the following to say in response:

I ate yummy-yummy frog... But yummy hurt my tummy! Worth it. Yum yum!
Near done! More room made means I eat more soon! Yum-yum!

It seems that we have reached one of FFF's lowest points, but Quina being innocent doesn't even care.

-

Pepe has been asleep for so long that he has forgotten to shave.

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-

You may all now post your next moves!
@Soulcorruptor @Linnaete @Six @Shace is Great @Mitsuki @Galadín @Daredevil @sly @greeny
 
What was Maybot realistically expecting? For the murderer to flat out admit without any substantial attempt at subterfuge that they are in fact the real murderer? That would be absurd, though it does mean that anyone in this museum is a potential suspect. Someone here, hiding their culpability under thick layers of carefully spun lies and honeyed words is either the true mastermind, or some silly sod who was just used and is part of a bigger scheme, which likely connects to Kuporius.

As far as she can discern, the major leads so far involve a dodgy blood-drenched sack that was discarded in the bin at the corner of the main hall on the ground floor, supposedly by an "irritating kid". Could this have been the sack that contained not an actual alien egg, but the bloodied corpse of a victim who was unknowingly planted there when Mogabod was distracted by an item that was mysteriously left on the floor earlier? And meanwhile, there is copious evidence to suggest that a good number of exhibits in this museum are fake, supplied by an unknown source and presumably something that alarmed Pomas before he was very unceremoniously ghosted this evening.

For the time being (Maybot is refusing to enter the aquarium while it is currently flooded!), she trundles to the security room. Inspector Fistbeard had already perused through footage in here earlier, but it cannot hurt to have another check of her own, just in case it yields another interesting clue that corroborates with current suspicions. After all, the cameras haven't stopped rolling...
 
The Robot is sent to assist Mogabod with carrying things, in exchange for taking him into the basement. Sam goes to interview the urine flavored child about the bloody sack and who told him to do it.
 
Vivian is pleased with her time in the luxury changing room with the ever so handsome perfume sprayer. Vivian tips the perfume sprayer a tenner out of satisfaction. She leaves the changing room (cubicle) and finds that she has magically appeared in the toilets (room).

"WHAT'S THAT SMELL?????"
Vivian is disgusted. She notices that there's some liquid (and incidentally a body) by the 1st cubicle. Vivian heads in and dives into the overflowing toilet, in the hopes of unclogging it...from the inside :/.
 
It wasn't easy being green. Dirk decided that he had learned what he could for now from the hungry chocobos and it was time look elsewhere. The letter he had found previously, although to all appearances was nothing to do with the dead moogle and his report, was still worth checking out.

Bidding farewell to the wondrous, albeit cramped chocobos, Dirk made his way quietly to the room of Modern Art. It was quiet inside.

It wasn't difficult to spot the offending piece of art the author of the note had been referring to. Whoever had created it had an odd sense of style. Beside it was the "art" the note writer had made....ew!

Dirk wrinkled his cute little nose at the noxious pile. He thought it would be a good idea to improve the "sculpture" so he took out the spray can he had acquired earlier and started to spray paint it.
 

We will have to round this up very soon!




Round 20:

Maps:
Click the maps to enlarge. For the clearest image open in a new tab.

Ground Floor:

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First Floor:

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Entertainment Suite:

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***

Particulars:

Maybot attempts to watch some CCTV footage. Much of the footage is still wiped or corrupted, but Maybot is able to watch fragments of footage of the library from before the murder.

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Sam attempts to talk with the young kid who slipped in Gerry's urine several turns ago.

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The kid is unconscious, perhaps even dead!

The attempt at conversation was not entirely wasted, however, as Sam finds a note within the hand of the poor boy. It reads thus:

Well done, lad. Next I’ll let you sneak into the pool and play with the blitzball if you scatter more pages in bins, toilets, or anywhere you see fit! Remember, every page you dispose of earns you a treat!


Sam's Moogle Doll checks if Mogabod will let him do some work in return for the keys.

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Mogabod has the following to say:

£!$%!" CHUCK NORRIS! Touching that £!£$"% alien, kupo!
Eh, doll... No promises about the keys, kupo, but I could really use a hand with this alien egg. It should have been carried downstairs, kupo. I could have sworn I'd removed this item ages ago.
NOW THE DAMAGE IS ALREADY DONE £!"£$ CHUCK NORRIS, KUPO!!! GAME OVER, MAN! GAME OVER!!!

-

Vivian decides on the peculiar act of diving into the toilet filled with Gerry Adams' wee in an attempt to unblock it.

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Vivian squishes herself to fit into the pipes, for it is quite a deep blockage.

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It turns out that Gerry Adams had expelled some potatoes and a pint of Guinness from his body with his urine.

Gerry's magical leprechaun water cleans the poison from Vivian's body, and she is able to unblock the toilet.

Vivian is no longer poisoned.

-

Dirk ♥ examines some curious 'modern art'.

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Dirk ♥ sprays his spraypaint can on the Excrements de Shoopuf 'exhibit', knowing well the true intentions of the 'artist' who deliberately deposited it in the museum.

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Dirk ♥ has done his bit for the art world.

-


You may all now post your next moves!
@Soulcorruptor @Linnaete @Six @Shace is Great @Mitsuki @Galadín @Daredevil @sly @greeny
 
Dr.Fistbeard uses the trident he has to try and pry the alien face huger off is face.
 
Restoring footage. Restoration process unsuccessful. Please try again. Restoring footage. Restoration process unsuccessful. Would you like to submit a report?

Drat. Maybot's functions are too archaic to allow her to restore any of the corrupted video files, so this measly untouched portion will have to do. She hastily attempts to copy it over into her own hard drive, but...have you ever tried copying and transferring sizeable files over to a potato? It is not exactly a speedy and comfortable process to endure. Maybot is luckily a strong and stable machine, so is unlikely to collapse from sheer boredom as the copying and transfer process gradually plays out bit by bit.

Once copies of the snippets of watchable footage are successfully saved in her system, she hurriedly trundles out of the room, nearly blowing her transistors for a moment when her computational functions are relayed visual information of copious water flowing from the aquarium and engulfing the floor of the main hall. Water! Her fundamental weakness. If only she was built to be water resistant like newfangled mobile phones are these days. Bloody modern technology and how quickly and exponentially it has advanced in recent years, leaving prim and proper, classic 1950s masterpieces like her trailing far behind and collecting dust.

Undignified as it is, Maybot crawls her way back up the stairs to the first floor and sidles into the library where the Book of Kelly is, ignoring the anthropomorphic green frog in a tutu on the floor. The guy even looks like he is gradually mummifying. As far as she is aware of, the Book of Kelly contains only charming Kellyisms (it's a delightful read, don't get me wrong!), but Pomas Pomson looked like he was eagerly examining it earlier today, only to dramatically react and look displeased upon doing so. Could there be something far more significant with this otherwise unassuming book? Maybe this rather forlorn Moogle has answers.

"Forlorn woman!" cries out Maybot to the uhh, forlorn Moogle deep maroon top and polka dot dress. She then plays the CCTV footage on her monitor thing in her lower abdomen.

"Pomas Pomson was murdered tonight, but before he was killed, I found security footage of him in this room with you and Sir Mogathon Pomcroft. He was evidently examining the Book of Kelly over there, but something caused him to react this way and it didn't look like a pleasant experience for you. Would you mind telling me what exactly happened at that time? Why were the three of you in here and what did Pomas say? What connection do you have with this whole thing? Does any of this have anything to do with the possibility that a lot of these exhibits are forgeries?"
 
Vivian realises all of a sudden just what she has done. The guinness wazz was delicious but now her hair feels a right mess! Vivian leaves the stall but is feeling a little woozy~.

Vivian feels a kick in her stomach...

Vivian comes to the quick realisation that she may be pregnant...but who is the father??? It could be one of so many from around the museum!

She thinks a distraction is in order. Back to the pub! Vivian isn't heartless though. She won't drink with a baby shadow person in the oven (other than a wee bit of Guinness, but in all fairness she didn't know at the time). Vivian checks out the left jukebox in the hopes that she can have a good head-bob. Vivian starts bobbing her head ahead of time in excitement :ohoho:.
 
Sam begins hatching a plan to force the mystery to an end. He orders the robot to pick up the egg, close it, and take it upstairs to the Hot Tub Room and stare at Kuporious.

I've got a bloody bag full of puns, deal with it.



Sam drags the child's body into the foyer with the rest of the corpses, and takes the note. He then proceeds to confront Sir Mogathon Pomcroft about the child and the letter.
Pomcroft's murder profile has certainly increased in Sams mind. He has plenty of motive and has admitted to dealings with the child in return for sweets. Although Kuporious still remains the strongest suspect.

What is Al doing anyway?



For the record, Al is in the hot tub perve
rsely looking at the girls. He's a hologram, but he still has needs.
 
We will have to round this up very VERY soon!




Round 21:

Maps:
Click the maps to enlarge. For the clearest image open in a new tab.

Ground Floor:

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First Floor:

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Entertainment Suite:


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***

Particulars:

Dr. Fistbeard attempts to pry the alien facehugger from his face with the Trident of the Oracle.

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The alien facehugger is loose and lifeless by the time that Dr. Fistbeard pokes it, and it comes off with ease.

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Dr. Fistbeard feels fine now...

-

Maybot speaks to the librarian, Kupobella Buqwyrm, and shows her the CCTV footage.

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Kupobella is quite traumatised by the footage and has the following to say:

A forgery? The Book of Kelly? HA! No way, kupo!!! Ah-ha ha ha...
I- I am the
world's leading expert on the Book of Kelly, kupo! I based my career on it, actually. I know what I am talking about and would notice a forgery, kupo!
Yes, Pomson was poking at it quite crudely, kupo... I don't recall the weird old man being here, but Pomcroft is almost part of the furniture these days, kupo! But Pomson...
AH! If it turned out to be a forgery it would be- AHHHH!!! No way, kupo!
It is real! It is truth!

-

Vivian turns on a jukebox and the machine selects a random song.

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Vivian's baby kicks to the rhythm of the song.

There is a note tucked behind the screen of the jukebox which reads thus:

Miss Selz is using you, Pomson... I hate to break it to you, but she means you ill. You think I'm only jealous, but I worry about your sanity! A truckload of kuponuts to her apartment is an excessive gesture. The song you wrote about the breeze from her wings being the only thing that cools your passion for her is a catchy number because it is funny, not because it is a good love song. Selz does not care about you. Please stop, Pomson. I care about you deeply and I worry that you are going mad. Your other obsession is also at conflict with your desires... You do realise that, right? Choose! Focus!


-

Sam drags the urine-soaked kid into the lobby and then interviews Sir Mogathon Pomcroft about said child and letter.

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Sir Mogathon Pomcroft has the following to say:

You ask about the boy, kup-O? My generation would often set boy-servants with menial tasks whilst we set ourselves to work on more serious matters you folk could hardly understand, kup-O... I also cannot move as quickly as I once could, and so it is only logical, kup-O. Ehhh! How am I meant to recall what the notes he was discarding are all about? There has been so much litter about in my home that I canNOT bear it, kup-O!!! If you see the lad, tell him to come up here so I can whip him for not being quick enough.... Imbecile! Day-dreamer! Kup-O!

Sam's moogle doll carries the alien egg upstairs next to Kuporius and the Pomboy models....

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Kuporius immediately spots the threat and shouts out the following:

WAAAAA-AAAAHHH!!!! HEY, KUPO!! PUT THAT THING AWAY, KUPO! AAAHHHHH!!!!!
N-n-no-NO!
Wasn't this thing supposed to have been removed ages ago?! Has Mogabod been asleep? WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?! Are... Are you a murderer? But who is controlling you now? AHHHH!!!!!!
I'm so sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Pomela, help me! Stop crying and help me!!! The other Pomboy girl - help me, kupo! My golden pom-pom might get ruined, kupo!

-

You may all now post your next moves!
@Soulcorruptor @Linnaete @Six @Shace is Great @Mitsuki @Galadín @Daredevil @sly @greeny
 
Dr.Fistbeard walks up to kuporius with the face hugger still on the trident and sits next to him so he can see the face hugger is dead, implying that it already did what it was intended to do and sits and waits for his inevitable doom next to kuporius to see if he will confess.
 
"Rick Astley is so handsome", Vivian thinks to herself. This cheers her up no end!

The baby is growing quickly! It's already kicking and has great rhythm! Maybe too great...

In fact, the baby seems to love the song so much that it wants to reach out and experience it fully!

*POP*

With that, a beautiful baby...thing was born! It crawls over to the bar and asks for a double vodka. Vivian sighs, "Kids!".

Vivian heads over to the dead body in the main hall and pokes it a bit. "Why can't you just tell me what happened? :/:\:/". Vivian glares at the tart standing next to the corpse. "Who would wear that when standing over a corpse?".

 
I mean, we joke about Maybot being a robot because she seems to be capable of only saying the same few soundbites and slogans, but this murder mystery has truly brought out the best in her. Against all odds and logic, she has developed human emotions and behaviour. Were only her maker here to see her now. Now it is time for Maybot to proudly prove to us all that she can be like a human, a feat that she has never come close to accomplishing in the sixty-odd years since she first came online.

She angrily seizes Kupobella with one of her clamp hands and hauls her kicking and screaming out of the library. This commotion still does not wake Pepe the Frog, and we can only presume the thing has died in his sleep - yet another figure to add to this evening's body count. Maybot hauls Kupobella round the corner to confront Sir Mogathon Pomcroft, before ungently unclamping Kupobella's arm and shoving her aside to the floor.

"I asked this woman about what Pomson said and did when the three of you were in the library earlier. He was clearly examining the Book of Kelly and reacted in a rather surprised and hostile way. The librarian here does not appear to be capable of providing me with an actual answer and was content to just bleat on about her expertise in that godforsaken book that was probably written by some filthy Northern urchin. So, Sir Mogathon, while the lady is here now, may I ask you what happened in the library at that very time? The CCTV footage clearly captured you there, and it is unlikely that Miss Kupobella here would not have even noticed your presence there. You clearly showed an interest in the book, and you are also at the epicentre of a lot of mysterious other clues found that point to your involvement."
 
Since Fistbeard has turned Sams idle threat into a real one, Sam has the robot escort the Pomboy models to the swimming pool area, and consequently out of the way of impending doom. (Hopefully the girls will be very very grateful.)

He then leaves Maybot and Pomcroft to talk about the good old days. Then he asks the security guard to accompany him down to the security office to see if he can help him with the CCTV equipment.
 
We will have to round this up very VERY VERY soon!




Round 22:

Maps:
Click the maps to enlarge. For the clearest image open in a new tab.

Ground Floor:

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First Floor:

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Entertainment Suite:

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***

Dr. Fistbeard shows the alien facehugger to Kuporius and sits next to him. His very presence is a threat.

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Kuporius has the following to say:

Oh! So the egg already hatched, kupo.... WAAAAHHH!!! YOU MEAN THE THING ALREADY GOT YOU?! YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS, KUPO?!!! YOU DO?! AHHHHH! HELP ME, KUPO! PLEASSEE! I'M GONNA RUN AWAY!!! I SWEAR TO YOU I DIDN'T MURDER THE MAGGOT, KUPO! WHY WOULD I LIE TO YOU! AHHHHH!!!!!


-

Vivian gives birth to the 'beautiful baby thing'...

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People wonder who the father is...


The beautiful baby thing orders its first drink...

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Kupa Skiphop is not very impressed.

Vivian herself investigates Pomas Pomson's corpse.

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Vivian, being well acquainted with poison, detects that a debilitating poison had been in Pomson's system.


-

Maybot grabs Kupobella and carries her to Sir Mogathon Pomcroft.

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Maybot questions Sir Pomcroft regarding the CCTV footage and Kupobella's behaviour. The 9th Earl of Mogton has the following to say:

Heh-heh, kup-O! There is hardly any reason for you to be so aggressive, ma'am. Why, of course I frequent many rooms in this building. It is my ancestral home, kup-O. Those middlings never understood that, kup-O... Kupobella's alarm is understandable. Pomson had indeed shouted out that the Book of Kelly is a fake. Rather than being a medieval manuscript of high value, the book was written by some tipsy ladette as a joke. Pomson said he could prove that the vomit on one of the pages, which stained underneath the ink, is actually dated within the last 10 years, kup-O... Kupobella here is clearly an upstart who, despite her claims, is hardly an expert in anything...
We should pity her, and the decline of our educational institutions, kup-O!

-

Sam requests for Nanaki to help him with the CCTV footage. Nanaki complies and manages to restore some footage from the Natural History wing.

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Sam's Moogle Doll escorts the Pomboy models to the relative safety of the swimming pool.

They are generously grateful...

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-

Kira Frazer has fallen asleep!

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Pepe the Frog has been asleep for so long that Quina has worked out that Pepe had wasted away and is now an easier meal...


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Quina eats Pepe.

-

The Kraken eats Elenaboko's corpse...

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-



You may all now post your next moves!
@Soulcorruptor @Linnaete @Six @Shace is Great @Mitsuki @Galadín @sly @greeny
 
"Pathetic," huffs Maybot to Kupobella, "sure, our government has increased tuition fees for students, but we expected only greater academic excellence as a result of this while placing a fairer burden on all graduates, not just the most successful ones. I should have known that it would still not deter the likes of liberal arts students like you who bring very little of worth to the job market, and by extension the wider national economy as a whole. You disgust me."

And with that, Maybot leaves the permanently forlorn Moogle to weep on the floor by Sir Mogathon's feet as she marches towards the stairwell heading up to the entertainment suite. After a ten minute ordeal of ascending to the very top with intent to confront Kuporius once again about some of these...interesting exhibits, she so happens to bump into Mogabod in that very room. The stakes have clearly been raised and the endgame is nigh, so let us just drop the pleasantries and go straight to hardline tactics.

Utilising those clamp hands that look capable of puncturing an artery or two, Maybot seizes Mogabod by the throat and hauls him back towards Kuporius, ensuring that the servant and the master can be interrogated at the same time. A bit of force seems perfectly adequate at the moment. Maybe dangle Mogabod above the tub while she's at it.

"You both should know considerably more about the exhibits in this museum than anyone else," declares Maybot to the two men, "therefore you should both also know that a substantial number of these exhibits are also fake, such as the library's Book of Kelly and that dinosaur mural in the Natural History room. Some of these exhibits are also fatal for some inexplicable reason, such as the one next to the Coeurl that actually seemed to poison Pomson before his corpse was found this evening. What is going on here and where are these exhibits from? You will tell me or I will puncture some of your arteries..."
 
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