A Dying Friend...

May 5, 2007, 8:06 PM

Has anyone ever experienced a situation where a friend or someone close to them are dying and you can't really do a thing about it?

My friend Marcos, who is diabetic, lives California and I haven't seen him for over a year now. I found out a few weeks ago that his kidney and pancreas are dead, and his liver are only .3% functioning, which is basically useless as well. He is barely 18 years old, and yet I cannot even begin to imagine what he's going through. His doctor told him that he doesn't have much time left here on earth, and that really saddens me and many others.

A week ago, he didn't have enough insulin in his body, and when that happens, usually it messes that person up mentally. So he rode his bike and eventually got lost. Well actually, he didn't know where the hell he was and called a few of our friends to help him find his way, but of course, they couldn't help him either because Marcos was in a deserted area, where he could hear coyotes in the distant.

A few hours later, he fell on a ditch and broke his ribs. He was unconscious for four hours. Two days later, he finally found his way back home...without eating. And that caused more problems for him. He was in the hospital for a few days and had a hard time breathing. I talked to him on the phone 4 a.m my time and we were both crying...he said if something happens to him soon, just know that he loves us very much. I told him to have hope, of course...

So now here I am, thinking about him constantly...and feeling scared every inkling moment, wondering how he's holding up. I heard that they found a liver donor for him, but as soon as he found out that it was from a thirteen-year-old, he's been having second thoughts whether he should take it or not. Obviously, he felt bad for the kid...and I am amazed all over again how kind-hearted my dear friend is...

I'm going back to Cali for a visit in June, and I really hope he would still be there...I'm trying to be optimistic about it, but there's still that tension every single day, and I can sometimes hear the time ticking loudly - a reminder that my friend can possibly die any day now...

May 6, 2007, 12:38 PM

Man thats tough. I feel for you, and him. My only suggestion is alot of praying, and send him stuff via mail. To actually have a letter that you can read is so much better IMO than a phone conversation. I"m not sayin not to call him, still do that. But I think if you send him a letter as well as some of your art he could hang up, it may make him feel better.

As far as the donor god thats soo hard. Why would someone so young be the donor? Family member I'm guessing. That I really don't have even a clue how to answer. But if the donor an parents are onboard with it then I feel he should accept it.

Either way it works out it was meant to be. I think its great your going to see him and I hope it all works out for him. When you do see him try to stay strong for him and also try to enjoy the time spent with him.

May 6, 2007, 12:42 PM

What a truly saddening story, but I don't know how that feels, no one close to me, in fact, no one I know has ever died.

May 7, 2007, 6:20 PM

*tear*
sadness it is

I haven't had any of my friends die yet, i've had a few come close to die'n and to be honest, idk if I could handle it. I mean, I knw eventually it will happen, but i'd rather be the first to go if anything.

Im sorry for your situation
Here is a great big hug

::HUG::

May 8, 2007, 3:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sever Off

Man thats tough. I feel for you, and him. My only suggestion is alot of praying, and send him stuff via mail. To actually have a letter that you can read is so much better IMO than a phone conversation. I"m not sayin not to call him, still do that. But I think if you send him a letter as well as some of your art he could hang up, it may make him feel better.

You're right...there's always something special when it comes to letters...it's much more personal and unlike via e-mail, you cannot simply delete it with just a "click." That's a good idea - I'll ask for his address today and send him a card soon.

As far as how he's doing...poor guy, he just had a close friend die a few days ago. I heard someone murdered his friend and now Marcos is angry at life itself...and I think he lost the will to live altogether. Sometimes I do wonder why life sneak up behind us like that, unexpected, and almost cruel. It is without a doubt the most bizarre thing for me...

I don't know how to comfort him now. It seems I've said all the cliche things anyone can say. "You'll be fine", "Be strong", "There's always hope", "We're here for you." You then wonder if he truly appreciate these words, when he probably knows it's futile and is perhaps only trying to make us feel better by letting us do the comforting...when in reality, it's really us who can never comprehend what he's really going through.

I've been reading his blogs every single day and I always wonder if those entries would stop someday, as well as his funny and witty comments to mine. Right now, the stress is not helping his condition, and like him, I feel angry at the circumstances and what life is throwing at his direction. It really is unfair...just when he finally had the strength and will to say "I want to live for you guys," things like these comes up and kicks him further down...

May 9, 2007, 1:55 PM

This is a tough situation for him and you right now. I lost a friend afew years ago and its not an easy situation. All you can do is be a friend and pray for him. Yes the time will come and I cant say prepare for it as no one can really prepare themselves for such a thing.

Just be strong for you both and hold your emotions back. Yes he knows he is going to die, but the last thing he would want is to see his closest friends in mourning whilst hes still alive. Cherish the time you have with him and remember the posertive times and memories of your friendship.