Kit Fisto's Characters

October 17, 2007, 1:32 AM

Name: Aerandir Narmolanya
Title: Aerandir Narmolanya : Captain of the Mablung
Race: Elf
Gender: Male
Age: 108
Hometown: Calafalas

Appearance:
- Hair: Long golden hair that reaches as low as his waist.
- Eyes: His eyes are completely black like others of his kind. The black eyes give the ability to see farther away. The farther he tries to look the more resistant he can become.
- Height: He is 5’4
- Weight: He weighs around 200 pounds.
- Complexion: His skin is dark green with a soft texture feel. He isn’t very fat and he is also not super muscular either like most of the members in his clan. He has a giant scar that is over his left eye that was given to him when he was a boy. He also has pointy ears like most elves.
- Build: He is somewhat muscular but not so muscular that its extremely noticeable. He’s what you would call mid-sized.
- Noteworthy Features: He has other body scars from battle such as a scar that stretches across his stomach. He also has a tattoo on his back that signifies his clan it is the exact same sign that he wears on his neck. He was given this as a boy by the clan leader Zeris
- Attire: He wears a necklace made of pure gold that is a sign of his allegiance to his people in his hometown of Calafalas. He also has a bracelet that is dark blue and has writing on it that has the information “To my wonderful husband”. The bracelet was from his late wife that died 3 years ago.
Here’s the sign of his allegiance to his people in his hometown of Calafalas…

Personality: He is a shy and humble soldier that will do anything for his clan. Anything. He doesn’t talk much seeing as he is very traumatized by everyone he loved dieing. When he does talk, he speaks his mind and doesn’t care what other people think of him. Even though he doesn’t talk much, he is really easy to get along with. He’s also loyal to what friends he still has. Aerandir Narmolanya is a very smart and kind man that knows the answers to most things he is asked.

First Impression: At first you would be quite frightened by Aerandir seeing as he looks very tough and he is very mysterious. But as you begin to connect with him you will see that he isn’t as he looks. He would do absolutely anything for a friend. Aerandir Narmolanya doesn’t smile much seeing as he doesn’t really have much to smile about. If you are a stranger and you try to ask him a question his reply will most likely be dull or he wont reply at all.

Weapon(s): He equips a golden bow that has his clan name engraved on the tip around his back. The bow was given to him by the leader of his clan. It gives him the ability to shot more than one arrow at a time. His bow is very light so that he can be agile. It weighs around 2 pounds and is about 3.7 feet high. He equips arrows that have diamond arrow tips with feather fletchings on the end in a quiver on his back. He equips a Dragon Sword that is in the shape of a samurai sword. The sword is infused with the blood of a dragon which turns his sword dark red. It weighs around 8 pounds and he uses this for close combat. Its around 4.2 feet in length. A dagger is in a pouch at his lower left leg. The dagger is also infused with dragon blood so it is also a dark red colour. It weighs about 3 pounds and is around 1.7 feet. He also has a drinking pouch with medicine when needed. Its usually only needed when he’s low on health.

Armor: He wears red dragon-scale armour on his torso, which is made from a dragon that Aerandir Narmolanya has killed in the past. It has spikes on the shoulders of the armour which are from the dragons back. He has two belts across his torso that hold his shoulder pads in place. On each shoulder pad is the insignia of the elven armorer who made the armor. He also wears a belt that holds his sword and his drinking pouch. The entire drinking pouch gives him only 20% more hp when hes injured. He also equips gauntlets on his arms with small spikes on them. His body armour adds up to be around 20 pounds. He has chaps (which cover his legs) that are also made of dragon scales with spikes on the shin guards of the chaps. His chaps weigh around 7 pounds total. His steel toe boots that have a curved blade at the tip of the boot. These weigh about 8 pounds.

Magic: Aerandir Narmolanya relies on mostly brute strength but he also has acquired the element of fire and the lightning element.
Dark Magic:
Fire: Aerandir Narmolanya main element is fire so he is capable of using it for a longer time then his other magic spells. He is capable of keeping the fire spells close to him because of his armour. This only works if the fire is the fire that he casts. If someone else cast fire then it’ll affect him like other magic spells. He has the ability of casting every fire spell imaginable but it takes a lot of energy out of him. The only thing is it usually makes him tired depending on how much of it he uses. Some fire spells he has are fireball (makes him feel a little bit drossy) , magma (makes him feel very drossy), fire breath (makes him feel a little bit drossy), and fire pit (makes him feel very drossy).

Lightning: Aerandir Narmolanya also has the ability of using lightning base spells for a short period of time. He cast lightning over top of his opponent so that he won’t do any damage to himself. These attacks usually are faster then most spells. These spells usually don’t take as much energy as the fire spell does. It does make him dizzy though. Some lightning spells that he has are lightning strike(makes him feel a little bit dizzy) and lightning bolt (makes him feel very dizzy)

White Magic:
Cure: Aerandir Narmolanya has the ability to cast cure but only if he is wounded really badly. In most cases it makes him tired and dizzy and sometimes makes his attacks a little sloppy. Aerandir Narmolanya only has the ability to cast the low level cure.

Protect: Aerandir Narmolanya has the ability to cast protect which makes his opponents attacks to do fewer damage to him. This makes him feel weary. This spell doesn’t stop attacks but just makes it do a little less damage then the attacks should. Attacks usually do 100% but with protect it does 85% damage

Shell: Aerandir Narmolanya has the ability to cast Shell which makes his opponents spells to do fewer damage to him. This makes him feel weary. This spell doesn’t stop spells but just makes it do a little less damage then the spells should. Spells usually do 100% but with shell it does 85% damage

Abilities/Skills:
Skills:
HawkEye: Has the ability to see far away like anyone else in his clan. Takes little energy from him but it takes more and more depending on how long he is looking far away.

Attacks: He has an attack called “Daeron Vardamir” which allows him to attack quickly(Gives him the ability to attack his opponent twice). This takes a lot of energy from him so it makes him fairly tired. He can only use this if his energy is at full strength. He usually uses his bow for combat unless he must use his long sword or dagger for close combat.

Special Attacks:
Amdur Lissësúl: Shots 4 arrows at once that light themselves on fire but it takes time for him to recharge his strength to do it again. This attack is a fire based attack that takes up a little more strength then a normal attack does since it requires more arrows.

Rúmil Lissësúl: He uses the ability he has to see from a far distance and aims his bow up high and fires at his enemy. This takes up a little more energy then it does when he wants to just few his surroundings. It can usually only be used once in a battle.

Fingolfin Lossëhelin: Summons undead warriors at his aid that are weak and limited (between 3-7 soldiers, depends on strength). These soldiers are not for attacking but for protecting him against attacks. As soon as one of them are destroyed they all get destroyed. Seeing as these block attacks at him it does zero damage against Aerandir Narmolanya. It takes up a lot of energy and makes him weary. This attack can only be used once in a battle.

Celahir Léralondë: Allows him to push people that are close to him so that he can use his bow. This attack takes up a lot of his energy and it is his only wind based attack. He rarely uses these since he doesn’t know much about it. Its pretty hard to avoid it but it does no damage seeing as he doesn’t attack. It does damage after he shots his enemy with his bow.

Celebrimbor Vardamir: This is only used when his opponent is nearly dead and has not chance of coming back (finishing attack). In this attack he transforms into a wolf and attacks his opponent with one swift attack of his claws. This uses up almost all of his energy and it leaves him very wounded.

Quick History:
Being first born from his family which was highly involved with the army, Aerandir Narmolanya spent most of his days training with his brothers in his hometown of Calafalas. At the age of 68, Aerandir Narmolanya was training harder then ever before so that his father would approve of him. One day his father asked him if he would like to join the clan. Aerandir Narmolanya had no idea what his father was talking about. Aerandir Narmolanya’s father then told him about the secret clan (Mablung) of the elf’s where he is now currently Captain… Just like his father was. His father died a year later when he was struck with an arrow that pierced his heart. The person that killed him was from the Caranthir clan. Aerandir Narmolanya swore that he would take revenge against the Caranthir clan for killing his father.

When Aerandir Narmolanya turned 104 he got married to a beautiful girl named Huor Coamenel. Two years later his wife got sick from a disease that was going around. It was a very dangerous disease that killed you slowly and painfully. He took a year off being a soldier to spend time with his wife. 3 months later she dies from it.

Three years has passed since his wife died and he still visits here grave every day. Aerandir Narmolanya is now back in the army as a captain and he is currently searching for the man that killed his father. He doesn’t know the name but he knows the face…
Aerandir Narmolanya:

October 17, 2007, 2:05 AM

It's good for a beginner's start, but it needs a lot more detail and understanding. Feel free to check out mine....just click on my name, view my profile, go to the threads I made, and search for Zeria's RP Bio... that'll help hopefully....

October 17, 2007, 9:37 PM

thanx lol ill check yours out right now. i appreciate the opinion.

Updated RP!!!

October 17, 2007, 11:05 PM

Well done. Much much better. The outfit could use a little more detail, but other than that, it's good!

"He was given this as a boy by the clan leader Zeris"....XD sounds like Zeria, my character! Or is it and you just spelled it wrong? O.o?!

October 17, 2007, 11:23 PM

no its not but i can be if u want too XD i was trying to think of a name and i guess it came to mind... afterwards i thought... "wow this sounds alot like Zeria... hope she doesnt mind" lol...

P.S ill try to think of more to add on to the Equipment later... Im glad u like it tho lol.

October 17, 2007, 11:37 PM

XD tis quite alright. I was just curious because it sounded so much like Zeria....no need to change it...though you should probably explain more of his history with this Zeris...just to clear up a bit of his past....

October 18, 2007, 2:02 AM

well, seeing as how you asked me to look over it...

Before I get started, I wanna point out I am not a mod, and I am neither approving it nor disapproving it, nor do I have the power to do that.

Now, to the meat of the matter...

Right off the bat, it's not anywhere near the RP Bio Format of this site. That's a huge thing.

Secondly. Appearance. Way too little detail, especially on what he's wearing. I can't picture this guy except naked with a necklace and bracelet. Even then, you're not clear on what they look like, and I can't really picture either of them.

Even the armor isn't very clear and, as you can probably tell from my bios, I have an overactive imagination. All I can see is Dragon hide and wolf shoes. Not very original, nor is it descriptive. You should also say what part of his body it covers, not just that it covers.

Personality. Way too brief. Same for First Impression. You have to place yourself in Aerandir's shoes, see what he's like from his own point of view. Ten you have to put yourself in the shoes of a lot of other personalities, and se what he'd be like to them. 2 lines = nowhere near enough.

It might help if you mentally place him in scenarios and then describe summatively what he'd do, not in the scenarios, but what his actions in the scenarios would represent.

Magic. If I didn't see potential in you, i'd give up right now. but, as it stands, you seem to have potential, so I'll keep going.

For EACH magic ability, you should state the appearance, and the theoretical effects they will have on your opponent/you if they succeed. Remember to keep them within the RP God-modding/Power-modding guidelines of FFF.

Also, you should state how much energy each spell uses, and if some spells cause exhaustion on you, or make you feel weary, tired, etc. remember, no status ailments!

Life is, from my knowledge, an unnacceptable skill, simply because it can revive people. Immortality, even if it's not your own, is outside of the Godmodding rules at FFF, and, from my knowledge, is not allowed.

Weapons. Not bad, not bad at all. Your only fallin point here is your descriptions. Nowhere near detailed enough. You have to describe everything about your weapons, from weight to length to colouring, etc.

Daeron Vardamir. You should state duration, energy costs, any other positive/negative effects it will have on you, does it demand a certain amount of continuous energy flow for upkeep, etc.

Armdur Lissesul. You should state things like damage, damage type (i.e. fire, ice, lightning, holy, etc.), appearance, how long it will take you to recharge your strength, etc.

Celahir Leralonde. You cannot have a 100% success rate on any skill. In fact, you can't have ANY success rate on a skill whatsoever, because this counts as god-modding. You can say how fast it moves, and how difficult it can be to dodge, but not how successful it is. Subtle, but important, differences. Animating corpses is an exception to this rule, because it's not manipulating your opponent.

However, with your Undead soldiers, you should state how weak/strong they are, not just that they are weak. The substance is in the how, not the being. You should state their strength in relation to lifting things and breaking things. Speed and how long they can stay around are really nice to have, too.

History. It should be obvious, but there is nowhere near enough detail here to constitute even being a MINUTE history, let alone brief. Explain his origins, show his experiences, and paint a picture of his life.

Update that stuff, and I'll have a looksee again

I'm sorry if I seem harsh. I'm literally a literature/English geek, and I love my literature. When I see stuff that has potential, but isn't placed to even half its max, I get ticked. You have potential. Use it

October 18, 2007, 2:14 AM

well so far i like how much effort youve put into this for me. I will definitly fix it up. I appreciate it so much. I know ur not done but Its good so far. only thing that i had a problem with was u saying that it didnt follow the guidelines. I might have copied the wrong ones from the sticky but i did copy the requirements out of the sticky lol... but i do 110% appreciate this.