Cloud8

Well I have a great, amazing girlfriend which I am going to marry soon and I am no asshole. (Well I can be a dick sometimes...when upset) I work almost 24/7 plus studies. Seriously pal, bitching about it won't get you anywhere. Don't generalize. Sure some women do make honorary membership to Club "Dumb Airhead" but there are those who do remain that are looking for a good person to be with.

Why are you wasting your time whining about it in the cyberspace? Is not gonna change anything, is it? You are frigging 24 and you got a buckload lot to live. Most of the women you talk about are immature knuckleheads who think that some dewy-eyed glittering effeminate dick is gonna send them into world of adventure.

Also a lot too is about personality. If you go out there with all this negativism and "woe-is-me" you won't make it to first base.

GO out man, live, get drunk, enjoy life. You only live once. Life is short, heck is even shorter for some of us. Don't go down without banging a few gongs.

Close your computer, go to a Bar or a Pub, there are tons by the hotels (at least in my country there are). Make friends, try and try again. You won't get Daphne away from Fred out of the get-go. Get some vacations, visit other states or countries. I don't know.

Well hope this helps, nothing personal. Just trying to help. I have a friend back home who has your same problem and it took me a while to get him to actually enjoy life again.

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No offence OP but this post is kind of insulting to the women population out there. What you have said about woman loving ass holes is only like 2% true. I have never been with anyone who had the hots for only being with 'ass holes' as boyfriends. Like @Dean Winchester said....I myself have a lovely girlfriend and we've been together for over two years and we care about each other a lot and I am most certainly not an ass hole either.

Like he continued to say, is get out there more, explore the world and it's wonders and you might find that someone to share it with in the future

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No offence OP but this post is kind of insulting to the women population out there. What you have said about woman loving ass holes is only like 2% true. I have never been with anyone who had the hots for only being with 'ass holes' as boyfriends. Like @Dean Winchester said....I myself have a lovely girlfriend and we've been together for over two years and we care about each other a lot and I am most certainly not an ass hole either.

Like he continued to say, is get out there more, explore the world and it's wonders and you might find that someone to share it with in the future

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I also think that you are being too negative with your approach on dating. Different girls like different things. I'm not sure what your circumstances are but it sounds like the basis of your complaint of girls come from a small sample pool. And if that is the case then it is unfair to say that all girls only like assholes. You need to broaden your horizons a bit. Maybe going to a bar to pick up girls isn't for you. Have you tried talking to girls at the book store? Or coffee shops? Hell, if you are into anime and manga, try going to the local college on anime night and talk to the girls there.

You need to build relationships with things you have in common. Then focus on the good/interesting things about yourself. You have to sell yourself to them (but not in the terms of prostitution) and you do that by showing girls what you have to offer. Be it your physical or intellectual features.

Everyone likes to talk about themselves, it is just what we do as human beings. So listen to what the girl has to say. Get to know her. Maybe just listening to a girl once in a while will show you the proof you are looking for that ALL girls don't just date assholes.

There is my two cents and good luck.

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I am glad Cloud8 that you have decided to live a lonely, reclusive, virgin life away from women. I am sure it will be enjoyable.

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Originally Posted by .Mosh

No offence OP but this post is kind of insulting to the women population out there. What you have said about woman loving ass holes is only like 2% true. I have never been with anyone who had the hots for only being with 'ass holes' as boyfriends. Like @Dean Winchester said....I myself have a lovely girlfriend and we've been together for over two years and we care about each other a lot and I am most certainly not an ass hole either.

Like he continued to say, is get out there more, explore the world and it's wonders and you might find that someone to share it with in the future

so please let me see if i get this straight so i should be very easy never challenge never fight with her so point is do you want someone who is boring who is very easy to get or do you want a challenge with a backbone and someone to fight with take your pick

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Originally Posted by Cloud8

so please let me see if i get this straight so i should be very easy never challenge never fight with her so point is do you want someone who is boring who is very easy to get or do you want a challenge with a backbone and someone to fight with take your pick

You should just be yourself. Not being an asshole doesn't mean not speaking up when you disagree with something. Just be respectful. There are plenty of women out there would like a guy that's going to treat them nicely. If you put yourself out there with a negative attitude though, it's not going to go well.

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I've struggled (and continue to struggle) in the past to understand the whole relationship thing too, and I can understand the false conclusions that all girls want overconfident assholes who mock everyone, spit all over the place, or can lift up a bull with their middle finger, etc, etc. This is the sort of generalisation that outsiders can make when lonely.

From my eyes while at bars / clubs, I've never understood how that sort of thing happened. One minute two people in the room I'd assume had no connection with each other as they were not interacting at all (and were in different corners of the room, etc), and the next they're kissing.
Or on other occasions I'd see people speak for a short while, skip off into the dark, and then return as a couple. Curiouser and curiouser.

But no, the club and bar business does not seem for you, and that is the sort of thing you'll witness there. That is the sort of scene that will lead you to believe what you are believing, but not all relationships are like that or are based on those principles. When people are either strutting like a peacock or thumping their chests like a gorilla then some girls will swoon and go for that, in these sorts of situations. Not all. Others would go for people who like to pick fights etc, I guess in the same way that female gorillas accept the dominant silverback to be the Big Daddy of the band, and therefore not a decision based on any morals. Avoid this.

Of course, there are girls who would go for the assholes in any situation. One of the tropes of high school dramas (which I avoid, thus explaining any ignorance on my part in anything I say here) is the idea of a 'jock' being a complete asshole to unbelievable levels, but yet, curiously, all of the girls love him. Growing up you'd probably have seen this in real life too, and I know I saw it. Witnessing this might also lead you into believing that this is the case for everyone.

But as others have said it is not always the case. There are lots of nice people who want to know nice people, and sometimes you may meet other nice people. It's all a bit of luck, unless you do the dating websites / etc thing like some would suggest. Some of us are just on the slow road. So long as our bride doesn't turn out to be Death herself, it might not be a bad thing, but I admit that it is a lonely journey.

I wish you luck with yours.

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Originally Posted by Cloud8

so please let me see if i get this straight so i should be very easy never challenge never fight with her so point is do you want someone who is boring who is very easy to get or do you want a challenge with a backbone and someone to fight with take your pick

No, what most of us are trying to say is that you can't generalize. Life is like this: a handful of men like straight-up bitches and a handful of women droll over assholes. You can blame the media for that. Sometimes is about a common culture among a certain group of people.

Surround yourself with better people, believe me you'll find the perfect woman for you after working your ass off for a while. But like most of us mentioned, it's all about attitude. Women have sensor for that.

If your face looks like as if you were stone and begging for a death-wish, chances are, they'll walk away from you. Heck they won't even look at you, especially if you look desperate.

You've got to be confident and most of all, be yourself. A positive attitude will make you more approachable. Libraries, movies, college, at work... those are a couple of places you could go. You've got to socialize because the girl of your dreams won't shazham her way in front of you if you sit around doing nothing while complaining about how crap your love life is.

In summary: Stay positive, be pro-active, meet new people, go out, be approachable and most important... BE yourself.

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