Yaoi Master Gavin

So....yeah.... -scratches back of head- Never done this sort of thing before. Well, I've never written a journal sort of thing before; at least, not when I'm not on drugs. So yeah...still new at it seeing as I don't remember. Maybe I'll keep going, make it a weekly sort of thing at least, maybe a more "whenever the fuck I feel like it' thing.

On the topic of writing, I found some of my old stuff and when I read it, I laughed my arse off. I thought, "Really? The fuck was going through my mind?" Of course they had been written during high school but that's no excuse. I'm really quite pleased that my style of writing has matured and changed. Of course this is back when I thought I was bi and not straight up gay. Or at least I was in denial of it. That incident at Halloween kinda...cemented that. But I digress.

It's a bit strange looking back at your old works, even when they're relatively recent. Sometimes you can see the inklings of how you write now and others it hits you in face and sometimes it's not even there. Back then, I was fumbling around in first person, trying not to you 'I' so much. It frustrated me to no end when a paragraph began with 'I' or when I had used a word too much, like 'walked.' Writing back then was neurotic. I was constantly rereading my work and making changes. I still do but only when I determine there's to be a fundamental change. Even now, while working on a novel, I went back to change the first chapter for multiple reason, primarily because of the advanced technology that exists it was unnecessary to do some of the actions then and later in the storyline and thusly, it cut out an entire facet of the world that was...stilted to say the least; that is of course to say that, it didn't feel right to use it.

Calming down has been the biggest change for me; I'm not spending hours looking over my works until the story is done. It's usually a once over for continuity, a few notes written down in the margins and spelling corrections if I see them then onto the next chapter. I don't even bother with proofreading my writing for my classes anymore; other than my ENGL 1101 professor, who I don't think really liked me for some reason or another, all of my college professors have enjoyed my writing; pulling a 100 mark on a research paper is a feat of strength with Bruce. Grammar either comes to the writing naturally or it doesn't. Quite frankly, grammar is far from primary, at least in active thinking, when I write. It never has been important for me and I don't really care. To me, story has always been far more important.

My mother's side of the family has what we call verbal dyslexia. No one has problems reading or writing but when we speak...its gets fucked to hell and back. My grandmother could never get names right on the first try- she would go through 7-12 different names, both genders, before she came to yours. I get words mixed up and twisted around when I speak but when I type or write, there's none of that. Even now, as I write this, it's all been one straight shot in my mind but if I were to actually be talking to you and trying to say the exact same thing, I would fail miserably. So it's always been more important to me to get what I mean across before put it into a 'rules acceptable' format. So yes, story trumps grammar, all day erry day. However, when it becomes so mangled that the story is near incomprehensible, then grammar is necessary to clean it up. Luckily, I don't have this problem.

Something else I've clashed with people over is 'What constitutes good literature?' We clash because what most consider classical literature, I call trash, arsewipes, or any other sort of easily tossable material. To be frank, I've come to the conclusion that most, if not all, of what we call classic literature is only called this because we circle jerk around it constantly. I can tell you right now that Shakespeare is absolutely nothing to shake a spear at. It is mediocre at best. Before anyone begins to call me out of such things, I'll also say that Twilight is trash as well, though I stand in a different stance over it. Part of what I think constitutes literature is the ability for an individual to go back to it and read it again and do so multiple times without getting tired of it, or in a short term phrase, it's ability to last. Ender's Game is one such book I've read. Though the sequels can, at times, be annoying, the original work is something I enjoy on a constant basis. Now that I think about it, I really want to start reading it again but alas, I cannot for I must prepare for my summer class which starts tomorrow.

As a general rule of thumb, if you had to read it, it wasn't worth reading in the first place, especially when it comes to European or American literature. There were only a few books that I enjoyed being made to read in high school, and three of them were written by Central American authors. Fahrenheit 451 was another that I enjoyed reading though everyone else hated it (I've come to the realization that I go against the majority on a lot of things). Historical writings, even in fiction are usually bad as well. I've read a number of them and I do not care for them whatsoever. -sigh- I could type out a list of authors who I think are shit and those i think are worth reading but you need to figure that out on your own; my tastes are different than yours.

And....I think I'm done for this morning.

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